sedgwick Posted March 11, 2008 Posted March 11, 2008 i had a dream about joe and it was so real i feel like my heart's going to explode. it was a very, very vivid dream about seeing him and touching his face and sobbing. this effing sucks. i've never been this heartbroken in my life. i have no frame of reference for how to get over this. i miss him with all my neurons. i have no idea how or what or who he's doing. he thinks it is better not to know me. why, how? same old questions for months and months. i am still so sad all the time. work is good, things are exciting, but it's like i see everything through a gray filter. what good is it if i can't talk to him about it? he was my collaborator. we came up with so many ideas having conversations with each other. and I WAS A GREAT GIRLFRIEND. dammit, i KNOW i was. i was so good to him. i told him all the time how sexy he was, i made him laugh, i never gave him a hard time about playing music all night long, i was awesome. i was SUCH a good gf. so why can't i find any of my self-confidence again? how long is this going to take? this has been the hardest year of my life. hands down, no question.
D-Lish Posted March 11, 2008 Posted March 11, 2008 I truly think you put way too much energy into wondering why this man walked away from "wonderful you".... as if it makes you question whether or not you are wonderful.... You shouldn't question that, because you are. From everything I have read about what you have been through, it is HE that is damaged... You just happened to fall in love with a man who isn't capable of being with a strong, capable, stable woman. Those are his issues- please don't internalize them as your own.
Recommended Posts