Guy665 Posted March 9, 2008 Posted March 9, 2008 Hello to everyone, New member and first thread... I'm sure the question has been asked before but I'm going to ask it again. Basically I have met a girl and we have been dating for approximately 2 months. I'm 27 years old and she is the first girl I've ever been romantically involved that I genuinely like. In fact to go even further I would say that I have seriously fallen for her. I really enjoy being with her and her company. The thing is now I have actually met a girl that I do actually like, how can I keep her interested? It sounds insane but now I've met her, even though I'm enjoying the feeling, I'm also really scared of loosing her. I managed to create enough attraction in the first place to start dating her, the trouble is that I can feel myself becoming p$%%^-whipped and even turning into a wuss. Does anyone have any tips on once you've found a girl you like, keeping her interested so that the attraction remains. Any comments would be appreciated..
Kaito Posted March 9, 2008 Posted March 9, 2008 I would say... just be yourself. If she likes you, she'll be interested. You can't force her to like you though. It seems she's enjoying your relationship though so I wouldn't worry.
witabix Posted March 9, 2008 Posted March 9, 2008 Oh dear, someone has got it bad haven't they? Now dear boy calm your beating heart. She already likes you,, So just continue to be, you, as the previous poster said. You could try dressing as a rodeo clown, thats quite interesting. Or turning up for her with a helmet from a space suit under your arm, that would be a good conversation piece too. Shaving the back of your head and getting another face tattooed on, that will raise a few eyebrows. But if you try too hard she may get a little 'over-sweetened' and toddle off into the distance. So just remeber how you behaved when you met her, that is the you she liked..... And please don't say that she met you while you were working as a rodeo clown.....
Phateless Posted March 9, 2008 Posted March 9, 2008 Just make sure to continue doing the things you were doing that attracted her in the first place. I mean the other things in your life. Give yourself one night a week where you go out with your boys. Make sure you two go out once a week. Continue lifting weights, mtn biking, concerts, whatever it is you do that makes YOU happy. DO NOT give up the things you love to spend time with her - that will ultimately be your demise. Another good suggestion - both of you take up salsa/swing dancing together. LOADS of fun and you'll be doing it together so it's something to bond over.
Respktfl1 Posted March 10, 2008 Posted March 10, 2008 I think that he is right. Ultimately, show confidence. She always knows when you're lacking. She pays attention to you.. lift your head, pull back your shoulders, and smile!!!! She's still with you, right? Just be yourself, add a little spice now and again with little happies sometimes. Show up on your next date with some of her fave food or rent a motorcycle. Go do things and experience life together. If you show her that you are interested in life, and mostly interested in her, she will have more fun with you. Guard your heart til you know that you two may have a future, so you dont become obsessive. She will stay if she wants. She will go if she wants. The goal here is not to make her want you, but to let her be. You sound like a nice guy, now over time your true intentions will show. I have recently learned this. And it is very important to let her still have her own mind. I would say good luck, but I don't think you need it!
Balthazar Posted March 10, 2008 Posted March 10, 2008 If you look around the Internet , you will find tons of stuff and different theories on this matter. Read up on some of the material and you will form your own opinion on how to keep your GF interested. What does come across, unfortunately, is that you have a lot riding on this relationship and you may care too much! You need to remember that it is a two way relationship, and your needs are just as important as hers. Assert yourself when necessary, and don't be afraid of taking the lead. Show new, positive sides of yourself and keep it lively. At the same time, constantly assess her attitude and stance as well, and don't put up with her sh@t when it comes(and come it will!).
Phateless Posted March 11, 2008 Posted March 11, 2008 Always remember that if she pulls any BS with you, you CAN find another girl with no trouble.
NuTuDating Posted March 11, 2008 Posted March 11, 2008 Something I had to learn the hard way when I started dating again! It's not the man's job to keep her entertained 24/7. Best two things I EVER learned about dating and "keeping someone interested": 1) Be a good listener. If she's remotely interested, she will give you lots of things to talk about, even if she doesn't say much. 2) Ask lots of questions. If you don't listen, you won't know how to ask questions. There's lots you probably don't know about her. Find out! Listen for clues, then dig deeper. Beyond that, connect with her when you get the chance. If she mentions something that she's interested in and you share that interest, let her know. Then ask her questions about it. This keeps pressure off you to feel like an entertainer or to "be interesting". Being able to hold a conversation goes a long way and avoids awkward situations that might run her off. This holds true even if you're just asking questions and she's doing most of the talking. Nobody is that damned interesting. Her included. She puts her pants on one leg at a time, too (unless she's trying to squeeze into something she shouldn't be!).... Plus, it serves two other purposes... 1) It keeps you semi-mysterious if she does all the talking and you're asking the questions, and 2) you actually might find out something about her that will either further endear her to you or you might find out something that would be a deal-breaker. And all of this with a good sense of humor. Make her laugh.
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