Finn87 Posted March 6, 2008 Posted March 6, 2008 (edited) So I am in a really complicated situation right now. I dated a girl for 4 years and it was the most incredible time of my life. We loved each other so much and spent every second with each other until I went off to college two years ago. This put a huge strain on us. The long distance thing made both of us really unhappy so I decided to transfer to a really great liberal arts school here in our hometown. After a year on the rocks, this really put our relationship back on track during this past summer. We were no longer stressed and were very optimistic that things would get better. Well, they didn't. They got worse actually. We had both changed so much during my first year in college that it was hard to find that spark again. I still loved her more than anything in the world, but we just couldn't find any common ground. We made it through the summer, I started school here in town, and then out of nowhere we break up. She came to my house and broke up with me. She said it was just a break at first, she just needed time for both of us to do things on our own and to become individuals again so we wouldn't stress each other out. Although I was devestated and so was she, it seemed like the right move. We had both neglected our own lives to be with each other and the sacrifices were starting to become too costly. We had stopped hanging out with our friends, stopped having serious hobbies, it was all about the two of us just being together. Well this break turned into a full blown break up. She basically let loose, I dont blame her, and started partying and to my surprise hooking up with other guys. I guess she found out she liked that life better so she told me to move on for good. I was reluctant at first, but I eventually decided it was best. I started picking up my old hobbies. I was a decent up and coming amateur boxer back before I met her so I started doing that religiously. I joined the Army ROTC program and signed a contract to put in 4 years of active duty once I graduate. My life was back on track, I was doing the things I had always loved and wanted to do, but I still missed her and still loved her so much. I had moved on, but inside I was hurting a lot and wanted her back. She had her time in the sun and got all the partying out of her system and from what I hear has settled down. She still hasnt had a boyfriend in all this time which is weird. You'd think she would try dating someone new. Its been 7 months and she still hasnt tried dating. And I know lots of guys have tried to date her. She is absolutely gorgeous and could have anyone she wanted, but I guess she is having fun being single. She did find a new group of friends and she told them a bunch of negative stuff about me like I held her back for years, etc. She also told them she wishes she never dated me because she missed out on so much, which hurt me to hear. But here is where it gets complicated. We are two years apart in school. I found out she is coming to the college I go to. I knew when I transferred there that she really wanted to go there, but I didnt think she actually would once we broke up. This school is only 1600 people. I am going to have to spend the next 2 years right by her, passing her everyday. How is this going to work? I mean we were high school sweet hearts, were deeply in love for years, and then she broke my heart. As soon as I start making progress and moving on, she is right in front of me again. It gives me false hope, makes me think that its impossible for us not to get back together. We both have our own lives now, so its not like we would be holding each other back anymore...at the sametime, I know I shouldnt think like that but its impossible not to. I just dont know how to handle this situation, it really complicates things. And lets say for one second we do happen to get back together, well as soon as I graduate im on active duty in the military, probably going to Iraq since im going to be an infantry officer. Anyone have any advice or similar experiences? I still love this girl so much, I think I always will, and its hard knowing I have to go to school with her again for 2 years. Edited March 6, 2008 by Finn87
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