Mom2my3Monkeys Posted March 5, 2008 Posted March 5, 2008 Hello there, I am new to this site, I just came across it today and it looks like something where I can get some support and advice. I have been married for almost two years (second marriage) we have a nine month old little girl, of course in the bigging it was like a fairy tale...almost to perfect, I moved away from a good job, a good place to live to be with my husband when we got married, he sold EVERYTHING that belonged to me since we combined houses, he even sold the two cars I had and bought two new ones...He said for a new start I say now, for control. The past year he has turned into someone I hardly know, he got upset at me for asking a question about a female friend the night before Valentines Day and he left for awhile and came home and slept on the couch and when I tried to talk to him he just said that I AM A TOTALL F'ing B*&%h. He has never name called, he tells me to F off a lot when he gets frustrated wiht me, and I have yet to figure out why he gets frustrated, he said that I need to just give him his space and let him do what he wants to do and we will be fine. I sometimes don't even feel like a married couple, I feel like he has this total seperate life on the side and that he just wanted a family and that is why he married me. I used to love when he would come home from work, now I dread it cause I am unsure of what kind of mood he will be in when he walks through the door. I had broncitis and was so sick last week, what does he do, gets on his laptop and has me get up to make him food....I just am so hurt and when I try to talk to him he just gets MAD and it gets worse. So lonely, SO hurt...but getting so SICK OF IT ALL!!!!
sb129 Posted March 5, 2008 Posted March 5, 2008 Sorry to hear that you are feeling this way. I have a problem with the way your H says this: that I need to just give him his space and let him do what he wants to do and we will be fine. A good partnership doesn't work like that- there are TWO people in the R, and if one wants their own way all the time, then they should be single instead of completely disregarding the other persons feelings. How is he with your daughter?
Author Mom2my3Monkeys Posted March 5, 2008 Author Posted March 5, 2008 He is awesome with the baby.....Shows her MUCH MORE ATTENTION than he does to me. I agree with what you just said, I do not understand why he even wanted to get married in the first place. He wants the wife but wants the single life to and I can't handle that.
guessjeans Posted March 6, 2008 Posted March 6, 2008 That behavior is abusive and you should NEVER have to take that, from anyone. Would you allow your next door neighbour to talk to you like that?? Your daughter when she grows up?? Your boss at work?? Your sister or brother?? No, NO, and NO again. Then why the hell should we tolerate that kind of abuse from a spouse?? I would be wanting to teach that lad a lesson or two i"ll tell ya. I would DEMAND that he treat me with the respect i have EARNED and desire..this is not negotiable and a DEAL BREAKER! Secondly, i would tell him flat out, you want to be single, I can make that happen for you. Why oh WHY do woman give up their independence for a relationship?? Everything that was once yours, no longer exists. Love truly is blind! Stand up for yourself girl! He sounds like a bully! Its like how dare you question anything I do! Do your job, looking after our daughter, and let me do what I want to do! Ahhhh! Reality check mister! Last time i looked, we have a marriage license and vows to honour and cherish, and if you arent up to it anymore, then tell him to check out! Have you considered that he is seeing someone else?? I would be doing everything in my power to check on that.
Recommended Posts