Maxi Posted March 4, 2008 Posted March 4, 2008 I was just wondering if anyone has ever experienced a needy SO in a relationship? If so how did you deal with it? It seems as though my GF has a million problems and needs at the moment and she expects me to make them all disappear. I've helped her through a lot of difficult situations in the past... but it seems that all Im doing at the moment is giving and solving her problems. Any comments or advice is appreciated! Cheers
Star Gazer Posted March 4, 2008 Posted March 4, 2008 What makes you think she wants you to actually solve her problems? One of the main misunderstandings between the sexes is that many women complain just to be heard, understood, and validated, while men think that it is their responsibility to fix whatever it is she's complaining about. Once you realize she just wants you to listen and not make changes/fix things, perhaps you won't view her as being needy anymore...? Just a thought.
CaliGuy Posted March 4, 2008 Posted March 4, 2008 She just wants to vent and for you to listen. Until she ASKS you to do something for her specifically or ASKS for advice, just sit there and listen to her talk.
Author Maxi Posted March 4, 2008 Author Posted March 4, 2008 Thanks for your posts... I agree with you both and can recognise when its just her venting. However it rarely is! Its usually followed by comments such as "I really need your help" or "your the best problem solver in the world, I dont have to worry... you fix everthing".... and a million more comments along those lines. Believe me, I would much prefer to listen and provide advise... but when she specifically asks for me to fix her problems ALL the time.. I think its a bit more than a vent or her seeking validation...
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