Jealousy.

[samunknown]

Does anyone else feel extremely jealous when the person you like is talking to someone else? Ever get that feeling 'she is doing the same thing, talking the same way to me as other people.

[rgiles]

No......because I'm not insecure....jealousy comes from insecurity.....and it will ruin relationships....but if you keep thinking they are....dont drive yourself crazy with it.....just let it go.....

[shadowofman]

So are you jealous of the other person or possessive of the girl you are talking to?

 

Possessive behavior is normal for most people. Jealousy is a sign of a poor self-esteem and possibly a feeling in inferiority to what you perceive as threats. While also normal, it is not a healthy emotion.

 

But to answer your question, no, I don't get jealous and I'm mostly lacking the ability to possess another. That's just me.

[samunknown]

Jealous of the other person.

 

How do you stop being insecure? Can't help feeling it. Also, the girl may just be one I have a crush on.

 

Any advice?

[D-Lish]

Well, it's an anonymous forum here so you can feel free to be 100% honest about who you are in this picture and who the person you are talking about is.

 

I think jealousy is a pretty natural emotion when you like someone. It becomes unnatural if it's something you obsess about or it stems from a major self esteem issue.

 

If it's just a matter of liking a girl and wondering if she likes you back, that's not strange to feel a bit jealous.

 

If the jealousy leads to anger- control issues when you are in a relationship, then there is a problem that needs addressing.

Care to share more of the story?

Maybe we can help better.

[shadowofman]

Don't know. All I can tell you is to be happy with who you are. Accept the fact that you are not the best looking, the smartest, the funniest, the richest, and you don't have the biggest pecker, etc. Do what makes you happy, even if it's not "cool". But I don't know how this is done if you have a serious issue with insecurety.

[Lovelybird]

Jealous of the other person.

 

How do you stop being insecure? Can't help feeling it. Also, the girl may just be one I have a crush on.

 

Any advice?

If you know she likes you, not the other person, would you still be jealous?

[carhill]

When I feel jealousy, I look at myself. The emotion is telling me something. Is it pervasive or situational? Is there a basis for it?

 

For example, if I think someone is "using" me, but am not sure, my jealousy can serve as a wake-up call to examine that and deal with it. That might be applicable to the OP.

 

I also use that feeling as an intrinsic gauge of my emotional involvement. I'm never jealous of someone I don't care about, even briefly. So, if I do have brief pangs of jealousy, I view that as a sign that the person it relates to does matter to me. That's good information.

 

I think the trick is to use jealousy as a tool and not let it rule one. I've noted, as I've become older and more experienced, I can more easily dismiss such emotions, recognizing their value, but moving on from them.

 

Some peace for the OP might come from the realization that the person they like might like them too and that's a really cool thing. Take a risk and let that emotion work for you instead of against you. It's normal for people to like more than one person, and even love more than one person, in different ways. Life experience will teach you to discern that and value the love for what it brings to your life.