Loli241 Posted March 2, 2008 Posted March 2, 2008 (edited) There is this guy that I work with who has done some things that make me think I should not get too close to him, even though he has tried to strike up a friendship, and I was hoping to get some feedback. The first week he started work, he was getting to know everyone. One of the people there is a nice person who just happens to talk - a lot! Its not really offensive, I don't think. Anyways, the new guy was asking me some questions about myself and the chatty guy started to mention some things, and the new guy turned to him and said, very nasty, "oh, shut up! You are so annoying! It is so difficult to have a conversation with you interrupting!" I was kind of shocked, because I really felt this was uncalled for, especially as he was new and just getting to know everyone. Well, at a meeting with our boss and others sometime later, a casual conversation on the way different organizations are run came up, and everyone was sharing their thoughts. The new guy shared his, and our boss politely shared hers, which was different from his. He then proceeded to get extremely irritated and in a snappy tone went on to say how he knew he was right and why he knew he was right, ("and so there!" kind of attitude) Then our boss had some constructive criticism for him. He was so offended by her criticism that he was calling her a bitch behind her back (I really felt her criticism was justified.) Another time in a conversation, someone tried to express an opinion different than his. He refused to listen and then, when the person politely dropped it, he waited a few minutes and then brought it up again, saying that anyone who thought differently than him would have to be a complete ..... he didn't finish his thought, but it seems idiot would be a fair fill in the blank word to surmise! He then caught himself and said, well, I better just stop myself. Later he mentioned he couldn't wait to get back around people who think like him. There are many examples like this of him getting snappy and rude. He even called a girl we all work with, who is really a great, extraordinary person, wonderful hard worker and so pleasant, a drama queen behind her back even though he does not know her that well! (I have never told her this because it would hurt her feelings.) Well, he has made suggestions in the past that we should hang out, but I have always sort of put him off. My reason for doing so is that I feel while he can be very pleasant, his snappy, critical attitude which seems to come out of nowhere is a bad sign. For someone who does not know other people that well, to talk that way, seems to suggest if I got to know him it would just get a lot worse! I was wondering if other people think that these instances I have seen are red flags as well? Edited March 2, 2008 by Loli241
xpaperxcutx Posted March 2, 2008 Posted March 2, 2008 His refusal to accept others opinions says that he's very self absorbed and has no consderations for others feelings. I think you've made the right choice not to go out with him. He might have some underlying issues you might not know about. I get the image that should anyone begin dating him, he might be verbally abusive to her.
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