xfess Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 I dated this girl for about 5 weeks and I felt that things were going great, until she decided to breakup with me on sunday because she didnt feel a "spark" between us. Instead of talking to me in person she decided to breakup with me via a MySpace email. I was a little surprised and upset but I got over it and decided to move on because she really pissed me off with what she said in the message. So, instead of being depressed I decided to go back on the online personals and meet someone new. Well I did meet someone and began talking to her on AIM about a few hours after the "breakup" and we began chatting. The next day when we chatted, she asked me when my last relationship was -- My biggest mistake was telling her it was recent. Instead of saying 1 day ago (which it was) I said a few days. She was very surprised and seemed very hesitant now. I know she's not into playing games and wants a serious relationship - and so do I. She wanted to let me know that she didnt want to compete with feeling I had for my ex - I told her "that I moved on" and "That if I wasnt sure of it, I wouldnt put her in this situation" I didnt tell this girl that my ex broke up with me via email and what she said about me. pretty much in a nutshell that my ex thinks that she's too good for me and that she saw me as a friend rather than a lover or potential husband/father to her future kids. **note that all of us are 24 ** and she was freaking out that she realizes that shes getting older and found out recently that 3 of her friends are getting married after being with their BF/GFs for less than a year. I can explain the whole thing but I dont think its really necessary. I thought my ex was nice girl and down to earth but in the end I found out she was a spoiled little B****. This girl I met now is very interesting and I actually found out today that I went to HS with her. Im wondering if she should be worried (I honestly dont think so) but how can I explain and assure her that I am 110% done with my ex-gf and that I am looking for something serious, possibly with her.
EYECANDY000 Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 Its best that you was with her for only five weeks and found out how she really is, than be with her for years. I think you need to get to know someone a little more before you become exclusive with them. The whole point of dating is to get to know their likes/ dislikes, etc. Dont just jump into an relationship and then get to know them. Five weeks wasnt a really long time to be in a relationship, so its great that you was able to bounce back after the break up. Its only natural for the new girl to be a little hesitant about hearing that you have just gotten out of an relationship. Im sure she feels like she doesnt want to be your rebound person. If yiu like the new girl assure her that the relationship was only for a short period and you ntwo didnt see eye to eye.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 I think the best thing you can do is try to reassure her that you're not looking for a rebound in the first place. Let her know that your past relationship with your ex was short, and wasn't something that held enough significance for you to maintain longterm status of. Let her know that the position from which you're coming from is sincere, and that you are not in a rush to be in a relationship with her. Tell her that you're willing to follow her pace, and that when she's ready, you will reciprocate that same feeling. Good luck
SeraBella Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 It's healthy that she is worried about your last relationship. You should probably just explain to her that the relationship was only 5 weeks and you're no longer harboring feelings for the last girl. Personally, if a guy told me he was just out of a relationship, I'd be hesitant, too. But if I heard it was short-lived, I wouldn't mind as much because I barely consider 5 weeks much more than dating.
AriaIncognito Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 It's healthy that she is worried about your last relationship. You should probably just explain to her that the relationship was only 5 weeks and you're no longer harboring feelings for the last girl. Personally, if a guy told me he was just out of a relationship, I'd be hesitant, too. But if I heard it was short-lived, I wouldn't mind as much because I barely consider 5 weeks much more than dating. Im will Sera on this one. 5 weeks is nothing in my eyes. If you were with her a year and were on the prowl a day later, then I'd find it suspicious. Just make sure she knows you're into her and want to get to know her. Not like you're exclusive right now either way.
AdriannaV Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 She's hesitant because she thinks your coming off a rebound, something like that which happened so soon doesn't give her much confidence in you. She is wondering how you could be over someone so quick, and that it probably is a rebound which she won't want to deal with if she is looking for something serious.
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