imagonnacry Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 A mutual friend recently came in contact with MM. After singin my praises, MM responded, "Yeah, but just don't mention her around W." Now, he told me about this, HOWEVER, he went on to say, "Well, in case she runs into W at a party or something." WTF??? At first I was glad he acknowledged me, but now that I think about it, I am really pissed that he is already worried about bringing W to a party...? WHAT PARTY? Thought you were miserable? I guess not if you are going to bring her out and about!!! I am thinking NC might be in order for a little while here. I have been thinking for a while that I should date other (single) people anyhow. Not that I really want to. I sent a text reading, "Not sure about your "party" comment, will have to roll that around a bit." How should I take this?? I am so confused. This same man was talking about moving out just last week, now he is worried about W being OFFENDED at a party? Been had again. PLEASE don't bother with the "you reap what you sow" B.S. I just want some SINCERE opinions, please.
Owl Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 I don't know your story. But my first impression is that he's NOT going to end his marriage. He's not leaving her. Because he's clearly worried about what her reaction would be if she learns about you. Cake-eating at its finest. He's trying to do damage control and keep BOTH of you in his life. I'm not sure what his wife knows about you, but I'm sure he's not worried about her being "offended". He's worried about her reaction to learning that he's cheating on her with you...which is gonna be a darn site bigger than "offended". LOL Why go NC "for a little while"? Do you intend to teach him a lesson or make him feel bad for his statement by going NC? Make him "pay"? Or do you intend to break off your affair with him? If its the first...it'll probably work. If its the second...you can't go at it with a "for a little while" mindset. Its really only going to work if its 'forever'. Make sense?
Gwyneth Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 PLEASE don't bother with the "you reap what you sow" B.S. Haha, good luck with that around here! Sweetie, don't cry over this guy. Now I don't know if you should look into bringing his W to a party as a means of their marriage is working kind of thing. Sometimes there are things you just have to do--like have sex with the spouse you are not happy with. Maybe people don't know they are not having a good marriage, and this is a cover-up (let me bring my W so it looks all good). Many people are more concerned about image than reality--this might be the case. Before NC, maybe you want to reach out to him and let him know this is a concern for you, let you know for real what is going on with W and him, and let him know that you are very confused why he is bringing his W who makes him so miserable, and see what he has to say. Figure out his lying pattern too--I have had to do this with many men, and after a while with the MM I was with, I noticed that his cries were just him--his complaints were just him; he was the one with the problem!!!! He was born with issues. Make sure you MM isn't stringing you along with the same ol' pre-programmed lines that many men use whether they're married or not.
Author imagonnacry Posted February 28, 2008 Author Posted February 28, 2008 Make sure you MM isn't stringing you along with the same ol' pre-programmed lines that many men use whether they're married or not. Certainly food for thought, Thank you.
bentnotbroken Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 Haha, good luck with that around here! Sweetie, don't cry over this guy. Now I don't know if you should look into bringing his W to a party as a means of their marriage is working kind of thing. Sometimes there are things you just have to do--like have sex with the spouse you are not happy with. Maybe people don't know they are not having a good marriage, and this is a cover-up (let me bring my W so it looks all good). Many people are more concerned about image than reality--this might be the case. Before NC, maybe you want to reach out to him and let him know this is a concern for you, let you know for real what is going on with W and him, and let him know that you are very confused why he is bringing his W who makes him so miserable, and see what he has to say. Figure out his lying pattern too--I have had to do this with many men, and after a while with the MM I was with, I noticed that his cries were just him--his complaints were just him; he was the one with the problem!!!! He was born with issues. Make sure you MM isn't stringing you along with the same ol' pre-programmed lines that many men use whether they're married or not. Now Gwen, why would you tell her good luck with that?
carhill Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t144757/ Is that pertinent? I'm at a loss
Gwyneth Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 Now Gwen, why would you tell her good luck with that? You know why
Meaplus3 Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 A mutual friend recently came in contact with MM. After singin my praises, MM responded, "Yeah, but just don't mention her around W." Now, he told me about this, HOWEVER, he went on to say, "Well, in case she runs into W at a party or something." WTF??? At first I was glad he acknowledged me, but now that I think about it, I am really pissed that he is already worried about bringing W to a party...? WHAT PARTY? Thought you were miserable? I guess not if you are going to bring her out and about!!! I am thinking NC might be in order for a little while here. I have been thinking for a while that I should date other (single) people anyhow. Not that I really want to. I sent a text reading, "Not sure about your "party" comment, will have to roll that around a bit." How should I take this?? I am so confused. This same man was talking about moving out just last week, now he is worried about W being OFFENDED at a party? Been had again. PLEASE don't bother with the "you reap what you sow" B.S. I just want some SINCERE opinions, please. He tell's you that's he's moving out next week.. and then is afraid of how his W might be offened at a party??... Sorry to tell you this.. but I would bet he's Not planning on going anywhere anytime soon. Seem's to me.. your beign strung along here.. by a man that like's to have his cake and eat it too. Just my opinion. Good luck. AP:)
ICallsEmAsISeesEm Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 Not a "reap what you sew" reply, but this is a sincere opinion. It's a realistic opinion, actually. The man lies. He cheats. He deceives. He sneaks. He makes promises he doesn't intend to keep, and you're honestly surprised when he does something that directly negates everything he's told you so far? Why?
whichwayisup Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 It means things aren't as bad as he's made it out to be in his marriage. It means you're the OW, and he doesn't want to get caught cheating. You know this man is a liar, a cheater and a betrayer seeing as he's cheating on his wife. Don't fool yourself into thinking that he's never lied or omitted the truth from you. I guess this is an eye opener for you. Things are not as they seem. Question is, what are you getting out of this situation? How long will be you the OW or will you end it? Or will you stick around in hopes that he'll leave his wife for you? You have ALOT of control and power here, that is, if you want to take charge of your life.
twice_shy Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 PLEASE don't bother with the "you reap what you sow" B.S. Ok, won't bother you with that. But the last thing it is, is B.S.
BetrayedMM Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 Been had again. PLEASE don't bother with the "you reap what you sow" B.S. Then... you already know. Opinion? Yes. You are correct. You have been had. You do know how to avoid a repeat of this situation, right? I'm asking, because telling you could fall into the reap/sow category.
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