Elena62 Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 "You're too fat" "You're too skinny" "You're no good at sex." "You don't give me enough sex." "If you don't give me sex, I'm going to f@$k other women." "F&@k you, I'm leaving." 25 years later, and after various PA and EA, I'm giving him what he wants: A divorce! (I should have left his sorry arse when he started to f$@k another woman when I was five months pregnant with our first child and he told me he didn't love me anymore!)
sandflea Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 Well - other than cheating on me repeatedly over the last few years of our marriage - she also told all of our friends that I was gay, that I had an eating disorder, and that I was a stupid, selfish, hack. I'm sure she just did so to rationalize her own behavior. Add to that the fact that she slept with my best friend, and left me on Valentine's day(05). But... That was another time. The good news about the whole mess was - once I found out about everything I immediately knew that there was not way in H311 I'd take her back. It made it easier to get on with my life. SF
Lizzie60 Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 I have placed this thread under coping as it is sobering to recall some of the nasty things people say to each other during the separation / divorce. So, what is the nastiest thing your Ex said or did? My last ex, when he read a letter that a young Cuban sent me.. he was furious.. he kicked my car on both sides, damaging it quite a bit... He also hit me.. first and last time.. He also paid 'cash' for the damages.. close to $2,000. Now we're best friends...
imagonnacry Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 He gave away my puppy while I was at work...
Pyro Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 He gave away my puppy while I was at work... Thats awful.
Ms. Red Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 Well, this wasn't during the breakup but during the marriage. My STBXH picked a fight with me while I was in labor & punched a hole in the wall. I can't believe I put up with him for another 12 years after that. And, I he punched 3 more holes after that through the years. I think the worse thing he did was when he smacked me on Christmas morning & our son was standing behind him & saw the whole thing.
e.clipse Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 oh, the exbf said and did a lot of nasty things to me during the moments we'd be breaking up. here are the ones i vividly remember: *takes a deep breath* + "May you burn and rot in Hell, where all of the other trolls like you live and spit at each other." + "Shut up, you f*cking slut. That's what you are, a slut. Pinche puta pendeja." (ouch, it sounds so much worse in Spanish: "Stupid f*cking slut.") + "These past months have been a mistake." + "You are a parasite." + "Just shut the f*ck up. I don't want to hear your sh*t. Ugh. I just want to slap you." :eek: he'd always take it back, though. he's the type of person who says ungodly awful things when he is angry, so i try to not take them to heart. but some of the things are unforgettable.
Phateless Posted February 27, 2008 Posted February 27, 2008 You don't love me. You never show me you love me. You don't do anything for me. (In reality it was quite the opposite...) I feel nothing for you. I still love you but I love someone else more. Her breaking up with me was the best thing that ever happened to me... Someday I want to tell her so.
Ashbash11 Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 "I love you like a sister" (after a 1 1/2 year relationship) "I feel guilty because I can go mess around with whoever I want and not get attached, like you do." "This whole relationship just felt like we were good friends. Nothing more."
Blue Eyed Brain Posted February 28, 2008 Posted February 28, 2008 Hmmm, haven't thought of it, yet....
so_sad Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 Worst things my ex-fiancé did: - spat at me - had an EA with another woman, hid it from me, then lied to me when I confronted him about it - sent me a message the day I was coming home from a trip, saying "I can't wait to see you! xoxoxo" then dumped me within an hour of me getting home Worst things he said: - that I was a bitch, a c**t, a retard, spoiled, and selfish - a month after our breakup, as I was crying on the phone telling him that I missed him, he told me to "stop wallowing" I know there's more, I just think I've blocked it out.
Touche Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 My ex said and did many hurtful things over the 9 years we were on and off with each other but for some reason the one that stands out is when he once told me that I couldn't even carry his ex's briefcase.
richardcruz Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 1)Me asking her what about her first experience with me (I was her first). Me:but what about you and I being together and you saying you were glad you waited for the right person? Her:People make mistakes. 2)Me asking about our breakup Me:Why are you doing this to me. I have been good to you. I never cheated on you and I always tried to make you feel as special as I could. Her: Thats Life. 3)Me telling her that I feel that I lost my bestfriend Me:I really miss talking to you at night like we always would and telling each other about our days. When I lost you, I also lost my bestfriend Her:Well your just going to have to get used to it. Just don't call me 4)Me telling her that I didnt want to give up on our relationship Me:you told me the first time you left me when you came back to never give up on you and I'm trying as hard as I can to do what you asked me to. If you were seeing someone then that would be different. Her:Well do you want me to start seeing someone so you'll stop trying 5)Me telling her that I miss her and I dont want to lose her Me:dont leave me. We've been through so much. It hurts so bad. (I start sobbing audibly) Her:you always get so dramatic about these things!! Me: (still sobbing) its just that it really hur Her: (cutoff by her) You know what, I don't have time for this Me:wait plea.. Her:---------------------------DIALTONE------------------------------------
dfreeman Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 Worst things he said: - that I was a bitch, a c**t, a retard, spoiled, and selfish Wow - "spoiled" musta really hurt!
RecordProducer Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 (edited) So many hurtful things I've read. Yet mine are no better. My husband and I have both said horrible things to each other. The following are excerpts from various fights (most of the scenarios repeat from fight to fight): Me: You are impotent! I don't buy it that you don't want ME, you just can't f*ck! I can't wait to finally get some.. I haven't had good cock since I split with my ex-husband. He: I don't wanna f*ck you cuz you gross me out and you're not good in bed! Me: I am fantastic in bed - everyone before you and after you [there was no one after him] has told me that I am the best, including yourself! If you were good, your wife wouldn't have cheated on you. And after the divorce, you were sharing her with another guy. He: Just get out of my life! I can't wait to get rid of you. Me: Bullsh*t! Is that why you're hugging me at night? He: I just feel sorry for you. Me: You'll be crying over me when I leave cuz you'll never find a woman like me and you'll never be able to sustain a relationship! He: Great, can you leave by the end of the month? Me: I'll leave very soon. He: You promise? He has called me a bitch and a turd and "F you!" and I've called him an ass hole and a jerk and all kinds of names. In reality, I get angry when I think about his divorce threats. We had a really good month lately, but he would mention the divorce occasionally, just in the fly, in a friendly way, and drive me crazy. I realized that even when things are good he wants to split, and I finally exploded a couple of days ago. The nastiest thing my ex ever did was not to be nasty at all. After HE dumped me, he's always acted sad towards me and around me, said inappropriate emotional things to me, asked me for advice in his life (on things I had given advice on while we were together and was ignored or dismissed), and actually included a representation of me in a huge tattoo he got so that he'd "never forget our time together". Oh, and said that hopefully we can be together in the next life because we can't in this one. I'd much rather be told I'm an ugly, nasty, horrid b*tch instead of his totally mental passive BS. That's such a good strategy, I must implement it on HIM. My ex said and did many hurtful things over the 9 years we were on and off with each other but for some reason the one that stands out is when he once told me that I couldn't even carry his ex's briefcase.For a moment I thought he was talking about a real briefcase and I tried to figure out the point at issue. Why didn't you just tell him: "You bet I can't carry her briefcase! She should carry my suitcase - from your house to my boyfriend's house - the one who is 2.5 decades younger and 2.5 inches longer than you!" Edited February 29, 2008 by RecordProducer
Touche Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 You're hilarious RP. I know. I should have said that. Ok, curious about this. How do you mention divorce in a "friendly way?" I mean seriously how does that work? I'm not being a smart ass. Can you give an example? I mean is it like this? H: Morning dear. Isn't it a lovely day? Perfect for a nice quickie divorce, don't you think? So why don't you put on your prettiest dress and we'll run down to that friendly attorney's office and sign some papers, honey bunch. Ok, seriously, how do you bring that up in a friendly way? I can't fathom it.
D-Lish Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 A guy I dated for four months- he begged me to hire him to paint my store for me because he needed money and I was interviewing contractors. I agreed- and fronted him the money.... $900. He painted half the store, then took off with the rest of my money. It turned into a text war where he finally said: "Look, I f**cked you, I painted for you, and I aint paying you back the rest of the money". I didn't see that coming....
underpants Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 "Look, I f**cked you, I painted for you, and I aint paying you back the rest of the money". Now see, this is where I might have to retaliate...in a hilarous and overstated yet benign way. Unfortunately, I have cultivated this sick talent. This thread is terrible to read. Yet, it is good to glance over your shoulder and see what you have been through and survived. Some here know that I have a list. A terrible, awful list. The likes of which I am embarrassed to admit to. Embarrassed that I stood for any of it for one second. I learned a hard lesson in the cost of caring versus the risk of emotional investment. Love smart peeps....and bounce.
Trialbyfire Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 That's a good attitude unders. To look at it in a positive light of surviving potentially toxic situations in our lives, and moving on. No more limping, no more settling and for some of you, no more abuse. While some of you are on your own, there's no one to say or do these hurtful things to you now and potentially, there will never be anyone else who will be given the opportunity to say and do hurtful things to you and get away with it. Actions to consequences. Move onwards and upwards.
RecordProducer Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 (edited) How do you mention divorce in a "friendly way?" A friendly talk goes about financial aid for law school. He says: "Well, you are ineligible right now for a need-based loan, but next year, you will be divorced and thus become eligible." :mad: Or: "You should apply to that school in Florida. I could visit you more often. I would also consider renting an apartment there and I would spend more time with the kids." :mad: Well, I told him I didn't give a rat's ass about where he wanted me to go to school or to make it more convenient for him. H: Morning dear. Isn't it a lovely day? Perfect for a nice quickie divorce, don't you think? So why don't you put on your prettiest dress and we'll run down to that friendly attorney's office and sign some papers, honey bunch. Hahahaha! "Look, I f**cked you, I painted for you, and I aint paying you back the rest of the money".This is actually hilarious! It reminded me of what hubby said to me: "I brought you to the States, supported you, you stole money from me [this refers to the postnuptial agreement that we both signed]... I married you cuz I felt sorry for you and the boys..." Whenever I started an argument, he threatened with divorce. He said many times: "I am filing for a divorce tomorrow! I am calling my lawyer first thing in the morning." The last time he even called her number and I left the house after two minutes. This was a month or two ago and he never mentioned it again. He did tell me some law-school story that he heard from her in that conversation though. Another hurtful thing: "X told me that he called the house and spoke with you and you were very nice to him." Why is this hurtful? Because after I heard it about a few different people, I realized that all these people didn't just tell him "Hey, we called your house, your wife answered the phone and surprisingly, she was very polite and instructed us to call you on your cell phone... why did you tell us that she's a bitch?" I realized that he actually asked them: "Was my wife nice to you on the phone?" As if I am a mental patient or something.. Edited February 29, 2008 by RecordProducer
dfreeman Posted February 29, 2008 Posted February 29, 2008 A guy I dated for four months- he begged me to hire him to paint my store for me because he needed money and I was interviewing contractors. I agreed- and fronted him the money.... $900. He painted half the store, then took off with the rest of my money. It turned into a text war where he finally said: "Look, I f**cked you, I painted for you, and I aint paying you back the rest of the money". I didn't see that coming.... ... if you did see it coming, you coulda said, "I shoulda known by the way you f#ck, that the job was only gonna get half done"!!!
RecordProducer Posted March 1, 2008 Posted March 1, 2008 (edited) ... if you did see it coming, you coulda said, "I shoulda known by the way you f#ck, that the job was only gonna get half done"!!! Hahaha! That's a good one. The thing is HE called himself a prostitute (gigolo) when he said he f*cked her and painted half of her house for the money. Can't you see it? I think he buried himself in sh*t with that statement. I mean if a girl would say that, she'd be considered a major slut. The thing that hurt D-Lish is that it sounded like he wouldn't have f*cked her if it weren't for the money. That's an insult, but we know that it's not true. I would just tell him dead serious with an angelic voice: "So that's your second job? Honey, why don't you go back to school and get a degree and a decent job? I mean, isn't it humiliating to sell your body for money? I am sure you can rise above the bottom of the society. I know it takes brains to get a good job, but there are some well-paid job out there that do not require intelligence and you would fit perfectly. Think about it." Actually, Lish, you could have sued him. You don't need a lawyer for lawsuits that involve small amounts of money. You only pay the court fees, which is peanuts. I'd like to hear him stating at court: "Your honor, I had sex with her, that costs $750 for ten intercourses." Edited March 1, 2008 by RecordProducer
Wheetabix Posted March 10, 2008 Posted March 10, 2008 "I wish you were dead" Ouchiee.. That was a tuff one, even tho he said he was sorry for everything he said in the last 3 weeks that we had to continue to live together even after we broke-up.
2sunny Posted March 10, 2008 Posted March 10, 2008 "nobody will ever love you 2sunny" god that still gets to me today...
Issues & tissues Posted March 10, 2008 Posted March 10, 2008 "Fancy a goodbye f***?" What was he thinking???
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