g1976b Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 Well I think today is the day that has broken me. We've been broken up for about 5 weeks and it has not been pleasant. Today she came over to pack up her things and brought 2 of her girlfriends. Terribly awkward. She and I got into a fight nearly right when she walked in the door as she was mad that I had taken down all of the photos of her. Huh?! SHE left ME! That put me over the edge as she complains about me 'moving on' and having no problem doing so when she later finally admitted (after lying about it) that she's been dating! So, she'll be back next Saturday to get all of her belongings and furniture. She even had the guts to talk about her "guy friends" coming along to help. I know the situation with one of them and I'm not worried about it, but I told her that the new BF or whatever the hell he is would not be welcome in my house. She was angry, but I think I'm perfectly within my rights on that. I guess I never thought it would be this ugly. She still talks about needing her 'time and space' and that we'll see what happens in 6 months or whatever. I just don't get it. It's like she's almost PLANNING on it. And as much as I want us to give it another try now, something tells me with the way she's treating me that too much damage may be done by then. Either way...in one week, it'll be over for good. (Although she still somehow thinks that we can be friends.) I don't know if she's just angry, spiteful, or immature (she's 23, I'm 31). It's so frustrating though when you can see people making decisions that are incredibly short sighted. Anyway, sorry for the venting/posting. I'm just really hurt. I know I need to move on. As much as this has been so painful, it's maybe going to help me now that I'm angry. As always, perspectives and thoughts are very much appreciated.
atc2410 Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 5 weeks is a long time between breakup and her collecting her things. Her cracking it at the photos is unreasonable but understandable in the sense that it is an emotionally charged environment and you're both compromised due to that. It would all feel hideous to you now but to to and fro between you both is not that ugly from a third party perspective given it's a break up (never easy). It will calm down after a bit of distance. Distance being the key word there. At 23 she's definitely immature. You being 31 would probably concede during your calmer moments that at 23 she's not doing anything too extraordinary.
Ocean-Blue Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 Sounds like she wants to have you around, just in case. She wants the best of both worlds: for her to move on, explore her options while you languish in thoughts of her, walking around your home wallowing amongst her images. Whatever. She sounds silly. Sounds like you're better off without her.
xpaperxcutx Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 She's angry and spiteful at the fact that you haven't begged to get back with her, or went crawling to her. Don't fall for it. She's just being really immature and egotistic. You should be the one who's angry at her, not the other way around. Let her get her stuff, and move on.
Author g1976b Posted February 24, 2008 Author Posted February 24, 2008 Well unfortunately that's not entirely true. I have begged to get back with her. I made some mistakes and have taken responsibility for them and I'm changing those things about me. The problem is she won't consider anything for "6-12 months". I just don't get it. All I know is I can't (for my own self respect) wait around for her to figure out whatever the hell she needs to figure out. If something comes back around in time I'm sure there will be a lot to work through, but I'm not going to worry about that now as it's not even on the horizon. Sometimes you just wish you could shake someone to snap them out of whatever's going on. It's like she's a completely different person.
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