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Does he want me back? Should I believe him?


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Posted (edited)

I was in a relationship with a guy from the US (I live in UK), unfortunately things didn't work out. Some months ago he made it really clear that he would never get back into a relationship with me, but by the way he has been acting recently, being super friendly, wanting to chat to me all the time, trying to persuade me to go visit him, it's making me think otherwise.

 

Here are some examples of recent conversations:

 

(05:18) Sudo: we let other ppl get to us and it tore us apart

(05:18) Sudo: we should have stuck together

(05:19) Guy: we should

(05:19) Guy: i dont know if i wanna thinx is too late

(05:19) Guy: you did all the hard work sudo ;p

(05:20) Guy: learnin hard lessons with me

(05:20) Guy: you dont want me running off using my newer skills on

other girls right

(05:20) Sudo: lol

(05:21) Sudo: i can't do it again

(05:22) Sudo: i had the best times with you

(05:22) Sudo: and the worst

(05:22) Guy:

(05:23) Guy: i wish you'd try with me :/

(05:23) Guy: or idk

(05:24) Guy: just come visit and see if you wanted to

(05:24) Sudo: if i come visit you i know i'll want to

(05:24) Sudo: but right now that seems a really foolish thing to get

back into

(05:24) Guy: :/

(05:25) Guy: cant be all bad

(05:25) Sudo: it's not all bad

(05:25) Guy: it could be amazing

(05:26) Guy: and you wouldnt have to stay with me if you didnt

want to at the end

 

 

(05:49) Guy: if you were a crazy killer sudo

(05:49) Guy: who killed all their boyfriendz]

(05:50) Guy: after sleeping with them 3000 times

(05:50) Guy: should i be cauhgt up about dying after 3000 wonderful momentz?

(05:50) Guy: or should i be happy that i had those 2999 awesome one

(05:50) Guy: (s)

(05:50) Sudo: hmmm yea

(05:50) Guy: i think i was trying to decide for you

(05:50) Guy: that you would rather not die after 3000

(05:50) Guy: tahn have 2999

(05:51) Guy: when idk

(05:51) Guy: i shoudnt make that for you

(05:51) Guy: i should try to make it teh best for both of us

(05:51) Guy: and not try to predict the ending before hand

(05:51) Sudo: yes i see what you mean

(05:52) Sudo: and my problem is every time i've touched the fire i get burnt

(05:52) Sudo: that's not a good example is it lol

(05:52) Guy: lol

(05:52) Sudo: cos fire always burns

(05:52) Guy: roflz

(05:53) Guy: kinda works

(05:53) Guy: but fire could warm you foreverrzzzz

(05:53) Sudo: yes :)

 

 

(We joke about ECT sometimes)

 

(05:54) Guy: maybe if they

(05:54) Guy: ECT you~~

(05:54) Guy: i can get fresh startt

 

 

(Mac is my step-dad, who's really sweet to me)

 

Guy (11:07:40): you know sudo

Guy (11:07:44): if you dont takez me back

Guy (11:07:47): im goin to date mac

 

 

(michelle is someone he met when we weren't together and seemed to be getting fond of)

 

sudo (16:02:07): and you would be acting very differently if you

wanted me back

Guy (16:02:58): ya

Guy (16:03:02): you're right

Guy (16:09:10): what would i be doing if i wanted you back?

sudo (16:09:21): lol

Guy (16:09:44): lol

Guy (16:09:51): besides not talkin2michelle

sudo (16:10:24): i don't mind you talking to her

sudo (16:10:34): you wouldn't think about her the way you do

sudo (16:11:07): you would feel differently about lisa incident too

Guy (16:12:05): mmm notedz

sudo (16:12:14): none of this really matters anymore

sudo (16:12:31): i'm just crazy about you

sudo (16:12:38): and i need to stop being like that

sudo (16:12:42): let go

sudo (16:12:55): i'm not telling you how to think

sudo (16:13:08): just saying

Guy (16:13:15): i kno ;o

Guy (16:13:23): just tellin me how to think if i wanna be w/you ;o

sudo (16:13:41): you need to think it on your own without me telling you

Guy (16:13:51): i am ;o

 

 

Considering he said he would never get back into a relationship with me some months ago, do you think he means it? Does he really want me back?

Edited by sudo
Posted

Personally I dont like long distance relationships so i would say try to move on. Hes hurt you a lot in the past and you know it.But If you really think hes worth it, then take it slow and dont get ahead of yourself. Its hard to tell if he really wants you back or if he just misses having you there for him.

Time will tell..

  • Author
Posted

Thank you for the great advice.

 

The distance is a problem, it was so much easier when we were able to be together. My children are much less dependent on me now though, so it is possible if things worked out I could move over to US. I know I would need to be very sure before making such a huge decision though.

 

We have been through some very bad times, sometimes through no fault of either of us. We do seem to be getting better at sorting through our problems, although there are still a few things we need to work on.

 

We have been in constant contact since the day we met (apart from a few days where we were sulking), even after the break-up, so he is very used to having me around.

 

Whether he is worth it or not is a difficult one, we are amazing together in so many ways, our relationship has been a very passionate one, and we can clash at times. He is unlike anyone else I've ever met, he can be so incredibly wonderful, and also very stubborn.

 

I am a little worried that he could just be playing a game with me, I'm not sure why, possibly saying he wants me back to test my reaction. He said months ago that he would never have me back, and he is the kind of guy to stick to his word.

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