mine Posted February 22, 2008 Posted February 22, 2008 My bf and I dated for 7 months...broke up 5 weeks ago...3 weeks ago he said it was over and we could never be friends. One week later he called me...I called back the next day...we talked for two hours. He sent a Valentine's and we talked for 4 hours. He invited me over and we made out for 2 hours...he asked me to stay. I did...now he hasn't called for 3 days. He e-mailed me last night, it didn't say much. I called today in response to the e-mail and at the end of the conversation he said don't get mad if I don't call you later tonight and preceded to tell me what he was doing. I didn't even ask him to call. I don't know what to think...
Elyssa Posted February 22, 2008 Posted February 22, 2008 I don't think he wants to give you another chance. He's simply used to you and since he knows you will cave, he figures, why not? It will likely stop once he finds someone else. Don't disrespect yourself by allowing him to have his cake and eat it too. You obviously want a relationship so don't give in to anything less than that. Ask him straight what his intentions are and tell him if he doesn't intend to give the relationship another shot, he needs to stop playing games. -E
s_n_d Posted February 22, 2008 Posted February 22, 2008 Elyssa is absolutely right. By letting him lead you on again, your just going to be more hurt in the end and lose all the respect you have for yourself. If he wants you back, he WILL tell you eventually. Until then, dont let him do what hes doing..
xpaperxcutx Posted February 22, 2008 Posted February 22, 2008 Don't overanalyze it, it's right there in plain sight : He doesn't want you back. Harsh as this might sound, but he really doesn't care about you, and he's just using your feelings for him as a way to boost up his sex life or whatever egotiscal means of way to lift up his spirit. What you need to do right now is tell yourself, you've had enough and initiate NC. You can do better.
Author mine Posted February 24, 2008 Author Posted February 24, 2008 Interesting...why did he call now 6 days after...apparently him and his son are both pretty sick. He said he wanted me to know that. So you still think I am being used?
xpaperxcutx Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 (edited) Interesting...why did he call now 6 days after...apparently him and his son are both pretty sick. He said he wanted me to know that. So you still think I am being used? Hmm... Even though you guy are broken up, I don't think he wants to sever ties with you completely. He still wants to include you in his life, just not as a potential SO, maybe as a friend. Edited February 24, 2008 by xpaperxcutx
Star Gazer Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 I'm not sure how anyone here can so matter-of-factly say your Ex is DONE with you given the little information you've provided. Sheesh, such negativity. IMO, all we can say is that he missed you - that's why he contacted you. However, that doesn't necessarily mean he's prepared to give it another try. Why did you break up? And why did he say the two of you couldn't be friends?
strife Posted February 24, 2008 Posted February 24, 2008 I'm with Elyssa on this one, though Star Gazer is right that we have too little information to make assumptions. But this is what i think. 1) It isn't a good idea to get physical after you break up. Men (and women) sometimes go to the ex for sex even clearly knowing they don't want to continue a relationship. 2) It sounds like he is in complete control and is abusing his power. He tells you when you can be friends and when you can't. You see and speak to him when HE wants you to. Then he basically tells you he won't be talking to you when you want. Not cool.
Author mine Posted February 24, 2008 Author Posted February 24, 2008 He broke up because he just got temporary custody of his son and too much was going on and couldn't give me the time he wanted to. He said our relationship was great, but there was stuff he had to work out for him and his son and he couldn't drag my daughter and I down into that. We talked about it...I said that should've been my choice. He said as he broke up, he still likes me and cares, but I deserve better. We agreed not to talk. Then, I drove home that night and was in a car accident. I did not tell him...2 days in the hospital. A week later he calls, I called back a day later. We talked for 2 hours. He was mad that I didn't tell him I was in an accident. He said he didn't like not talking to me...he was confused. Over the next few days, we talked, e-mailed. We agreed to keep the kids out of it, til we knew what was going on. He asked me to dinner...unfortunately we didn't go...he got sick. I dropped off chix noodle soup, movies and sprite. He was very sick. We still talked. He asked, "What we were" I said, "I didn't know and it wasn't my place" so I asked him...broke it down...what he wanted...not to talk to me ever, friends, friends with benefits, girlfriend, girlfriend with benefits. I told him I could delete two...never talking, friends with benefits. He said he wasn't sure but could delete never talking. Long story short...we continued talking. He invited me over...that's where I started. I never said we had sex...I said I stayed the night. The moment I walked in, he kissed me. Does that help a bit.
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