btc8 Posted February 21, 2008 Posted February 21, 2008 So, in my previous posting titled "Redemption," I wrote an email to my ex stating that I made a mistake, and that I was willing to work on the relationship only if he was. I asked him to reply to give me an answer so that I could be able to move on. He did reply and basically said that I should move on. I replied to that in a pretty retaliatory manner, saying that he pushed others away. It was along the lines of blinding him with all my feelings and how he really made me feel. Here is his initial email and my reply (if you want to read the whole post Redemption, then please click here): Me: I'm not ignoring you. I'm at work and having somewhat of a busy day. I like you. I like spending time together. I haven't felt good at all lately and it doesn't feel like it's going away anytime soon. I don't think it makes sense for us to continue a relationship where we want some kind of commitment but neither of us is capable of making one. As much as I dislike saying so, I think you should move on so you can get over feeling bad. Him. Here's my reply: Him, I accept that you want to move on, and I am glad you told me so that I will be able to do so. I don't need you to placate me. I don't care anymore that you still like me, or that you liked spending time with me. You push people away, and that's why you feel so bad. This 'bad' feeling isn't something you can so non-chalantly throw around. I loved you; you also said that you loved me. You drug me along the past few months but did not want a commitment in the end. I did want a commitment; you're the one who didn't. So don't try to pretend that it was something that I wasn't capable of making. You drug me along the past few months and then decided that you should try to move on with your life. I had such respect for you; you impressed me, and you made me feel safe and loved. You cannot escape your problems by moving to another state and starting a job at the beck and call of your sister--it's all an affectation. You try to drown your problems with substances, but yet you have no idea why you still feel so badly. I was there for you, but you pushed me away. I am intelligent, driven, motivated, and willfully commited to moving on. I deserve better than this. Thank you for allowing me to realize this. ME Okay, I sent the above email at about 2 PM yesterday (we live in the same time zones), and I wasn't expecting a reply. This was like my closure letter, my FU letter, so to speak. However, at 11:30 PM or so, I found in my gmail account his curt reply: i am totally f*cked up That was it. He is not a manipulator, but is he expecting me to reply to this in some way to try to console him or something? I don't know what to do. I suspect he really realizes that I may be gone for good, and he's trying to inspire sympathy in me. What should I do? Any help is greatly appreciated! -Brad
Geishawhelk Posted February 21, 2008 Posted February 21, 2008 Ignore it. Move on. Just why are you two playing this little cat-and-mouse game? What purpose does it serve except to maintain hostile, tit-fo-tat comments, one-upmanship, manipulation ("I'll put this, s/he'll have to respond now"....) seek any way possible to have the last word, but at the same time, see what the'll come back with, smart-alec answers... What the heck do you think you're both playing at? Silly silly game. Like I said.... Ignore it. Move on.
ANGUISHEDandBROKEN Posted February 21, 2008 Posted February 21, 2008 What you should do is.........NO CONTACT! Its not hard, just keep it all to yourself and your friends who lend you a shoulder. Forget him, move on, and let him move on.... Its over! Sorry for being so blunt, but thats just the way it is! I feel your pain and Im sending you a big hug ((((btc8)))). Be strong....
Author btc8 Posted February 21, 2008 Author Posted February 21, 2008 Sound advice, as usual. I am moving on now. I deleted his phone number from my cell phone (I never remembered it anyhow), and I am looking to get on with my life! Thanks!
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