smileysmile Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Hi guys. STBXW birthday is on the 26th February. She will be a very sexy 37 yrs old. I have bought a card and prezzie from our 15 mth old D for her. Nothing big. So considering all the crap I put her through in our R do you think I should buy her a card? I know she wouldn't buy me one. One from our D but she wouldn't. What do you think?
PinkRibbon Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 I don't know??? My husband's birthday is the 28th so I am thinking the same thing also. But I am really leaning towards not getting the card. Honestly why should I??? He left me...obviously he didn't want any of my future cards. So you may want to think about not getting her the card from you.
Author smileysmile Posted February 20, 2008 Author Posted February 20, 2008 Isn't it all according to why they left? If your H left you because of no fault of yours ie an affair etc then yes you shouldn't get one. If you have a connection ie kids..then it is an excuse at least. Besides, I don't think my ex would care if I did. I don't think she would expect one. As long as she gets one from her D. I think I might get one because I still care about her. Not to get her back but because it is her birthday and it is a celebration. Gawd strewth!! Shes my life! I feel like crying again
carhill Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Forgetting (or perhaps more precisely purposely not remembering) dates of importance in a relationship is part of the letting-go process IMO. It doesn't matter who let go first. It's never easy. I would be tempted (to send a card/gift/flowers, etc) but would do everything in my power to resist. Feeling grief over that decision is good.
mark982 Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 it all depends on the status of the break up is.are you friends?can't stand each other?
carhill Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 In that case (status of breakup and overall friendly feeling), the OP should examine how many platonic female friends/co-workers, etc he sends BD cards/gifts to. If this is normal behavior, and his STBXW and he are parting on a friendly basis, then, yeah, send it. But, if it would be extraordinary, I'd examine the motives.
Mr. Lucky Posted February 21, 2008 Posted February 21, 2008 What do you think? I think that part of your recovery should be doing what you want to do; those things that make you feel good. Don't overthink it - if you want to give her an appropriate card, then do it... Mr. Lucky
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