loneshark Posted February 17, 2008 Posted February 17, 2008 I want to make this concise, not one of those 10 page essays on my relationship. Let me know how I did I've been dating this girl for about 5 months. The beginning was great, fantastic. We started seeing each other pretty regularly, things escalated physically including sex, and it seemed like things were going pretty well. However... From the beginning, she's been hesitant about relationships. She had gotten out of one only 2 months before we started seeing each other. She also exhibits non-commital behavior like sometimes she won't call back, or she'll disappear for the weekend with her friends or whatever. So, over time, I'm starting to wonder if things are going anywhere. So, I basically started to question what was going on between us and whatnot, yet she was still non-commital. And then, she started to become more distant; she was starting to withdraw from physicality. So, now I'm freaking out, is it another guy? Is it me? etc. Finally, things come to a close early January. Says she can't be physical without being in a relationship, and she doesn't want to be in one. So I say, well, I guess that's that. 2 weeks later, she comes back to me. We talk, talk about how things ended, and I said there wasn't much else we could do. She said, well we could've stayed together. So, big question mark there. and I say how? She says, I just didn't want to be in a physical serious relationship. I say, but not just friends? Yes, she says. So there you are. We're super casually dating. She still likes me, still behaving the same way. I still spend the night at her place every so often. We're just not physical. I mean, we hold hands stuff like that, but it's much less than before. We still have a lot of chemistry. We still talk about "we should do this one day", and "we should this some other day." I'm just not sure how I should approach all this. My instinct/heart says, SLOW DOWN, ball's in her court, grain of salt, etc. My mind keeps racing, however. And I've asked if it was another guy or her ex. And she said no, and even moreso she has 'no interest in dating other guys anyway'. She DID say that if I were to meet any other girls, that it's ok. I've just never been involved with someone like this. What do you think? She afraid? Uninterested? Leading me on? A big fat phony? Also, how do you think I should proceed? sorry if it took too long, don't hurt me...
Peter_pan Posted February 17, 2008 Posted February 17, 2008 hey dude are you wanting this to be a long term relationship? if so this pissing around will only haunt you both if you both decide to do that. however from my experience when i girl says they dont mind you seeing other girls it nearly always means they are seeing another guy and so they are in a strange f**ked up way making it easier on themselfs for doing the same thing. personally i would walk away while you have the chance. you had your fun why dont you leave it there
mental_traveller Posted February 17, 2008 Posted February 17, 2008 Ask yourself - would you rather be with someone who strings you along like this, or someone who doesn't? Hell, I'd rather be single than in your shoes. If you were really meant to be together, this wouldn't be happening. There are so many other women out there, why settle for being second fiddle?
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