Peter_pan Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 Well I wanted to get an opinion on this as it could be extremely tricky for me. basically my ex's brother has fallen out with his GF back in england and is going through depression etc. now me and him just clicked in a big way and was if he was my mutual brother. for anyone that dosnt no, me and my ex gf where togther for 3.5yrs. so ive known him for a long time plus her family considered me as part of theres. My ex txt me the news the other day that he was moving up and is going to be living with her... so when i called her last on Vday for my own sanity and closure i did bring it up and she announced he was going through heart break (ironic really when you think about , me being told this from her who had left me for a new man) she told me he is wanting to not only see me but join my sport (snowboarding)!!! at first i was very excited but now i dont know what to think or do. he is clearly going to remind me of her but at the same time we can help each other out but...... it means she can "check up" on me anytime she likes and so can live her life with new bf and know what i am up to. so in a sense i feel she can have her cake and eat it.... im thinking if i told him it would be to awkward then i would offend her family. and get this. whilst i was away on holiday and i found out about this new guy i said i would talk to her once i return she at least owes me that, she said yeah but i dont owe you anything. and dont talk to my family again you just upset them, now she is telling me he is moving up and wants to hang about with me !! could i use this as an opitunity to maybe win her back eventually? even though to tell you the truth i would like to meet someone new ! advise and help greatly needed.
s_n_d Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 Honestly, Once two people have broken up it isnt very likely that you will get back together.. But If its meant to be then you will find your way back to eachother. I think you should let it be.
Author Peter_pan Posted February 16, 2008 Author Posted February 16, 2008 why did this happen to me if only i wasnt so stupid and took her back when she wanted me. none of this would have happened. why couldnt i see at the time she was this special to me
s_n_d Posted February 17, 2008 Posted February 17, 2008 Well I believe that everything happens for a reason. Whats done is done and you cant take it back. If only we could... Try not to beat yourself up over it.
norajane Posted February 17, 2008 Posted February 17, 2008 NO, it's not a 'sign'! You're 20. Yes, she was your first love, and yes, she's beautiful, but don't you want a woman who is totally into you? Isn't that what is most attractive about a woman, how she thinks you're the most special guy in the whole world? So why set your sights on winning someone back who thinks some other guy is the most special in the whole world, not you? What will you end up with if she comes back? More OCD? You can move on. You can snowboard with her brother and enjoy snowboarding and not talk about anything personal - guys are really good at that. Let it go - you won't start healing until you accept it's over and let it go.
Author Peter_pan Posted February 17, 2008 Author Posted February 17, 2008 you know what you are right. i have let her go now. its done. i cant love someone that dosnt love me back. but when you said "but don't you want a woman who is totally into you? Isn't that what is most attractive about a woman, how she thinks you're the most special guy in the whole world?" she was totally into me and thought i was the most special guy in the world but i constantly pushed her away and almost resented her for being totally into me. im such a fool. I almost in my mind wanted this to happen but cant work out why? i think its because i thought the grass was greener when its not. well, not yet.
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