Shane7 Posted February 15, 2008 Posted February 15, 2008 Lets get down to the chase, shall we? I met a girl last Friday (2/8/08) who came up to my college for an over-night stay. (She's going here next year.) Needless to say, I was interested in her and I ended up finding her online. Turns out she was interested in me and was also trying to find me.. So, for the last three days, we've been chatting online. Today, it was for 5 and a half hours. Didn't feel like it, but yeah. We are obviously clicking on a variety of levels. In other words, on the surface, things are looking quite good right now. There is definitely a chance for a relationship here I think.. (Note: keyword.. Chance.) However: She lives about 2 hours and maybe 10 minutes or so away from me as it stands now. (Me at my college, her at her high school, as she is a senior.) I do realize that she IS going to attend my university, which, ~~if~~ we do end up progressing to a relationship, is great. However, from today's date, it will be about 6 months or so until we could actually meet each other on a regular basis, face to face, at the university, when we both are there.. Does anyone think 6 months is too long a time to wait? How could I maintain a healthy relationship from this distance if that is what this eventually turns into..? The good news, again, is that, if a relationship occurs, the END goal will be positive= We meet up at the same place instead of moving farther apart or what not.. Is this worth pursuing in the first place? Thanks everyone.
HisLove Posted February 15, 2008 Posted February 15, 2008 Absolutely!! My man lives about 600 miles from me, and is currently working about another 1000 miles beyond that for the next few weeks! I think out of all the trillion square miles on planet earth, and how many billions of people who inhabit it, that a great match for you is not located within 6 blocks in any direction lol. (well maybe, but it's a big wide world out there). She likes you, you like her, have fun with it and the time will fly, you will be together before you know it. LDR's are a great basis for relationships - they require patience, good communication, trust, and creativity.
Author Shane7 Posted February 15, 2008 Author Posted February 15, 2008 Thats a beautiful reply...thanks so much! =) It really makes sense.. =)
Phil McCracken Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 LDR's are a great basis for relationships - they require patience, good communication, trust, and creativity. Yes, excellent post. Excellent, excellent post. They work exceptionally well when there's a plan for the future. A plan to be together. And you're working towards making the plan a reality. Six months is nothing - go for it.
Author Shane7 Posted February 20, 2008 Author Posted February 20, 2008 Wow...Sorry to bring this thread back from the dead, but I just can't help but respond... There ARE SO MANY people here at LS that are against LDR's in their entirety... It's freaking me out so much that I am seriously contemplating just waiting the 6 months out, even though the more I talk to this girl, the more interested I become. ... This could become a sticky situation, and I'm a little scared.. Thoughts ?
HisLove Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Those people who are bagging them, have they actually been in a LDR?? Not that it matters what sort of relationship you've had - LD or up in your face 24/7 - Loveshack isn't generally known for the SUCCESS anybody has had in any kind of relationship. You just gotta read the cheating forums and the marriage problems forums - ummmmm these don't exactly seem to be stellar relationships either. I've been married and divorced twice and they weren't LDR. So exactly how do you define something that works and will succeed lmao. Pay no attention to em. Do what feels right for you.
TMichaels Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 (edited) There ARE SO MANY people here at LS that are against LDR's in their entirety... It's freaking me out so much that I am seriously contemplating just waiting the 6 months out, even though the more I talk to this girl, the more interested I become. ... This could become a sticky situation, and I'm a little scared.. Thoughts ? Shane7, Think about it for a moment... It's just like real life. When everything is going swimmingly, do most people walk around asking others how to make things worse? No, they don't. However, when thing AREN'T going well, they ask everyone who will listen for advice -- and this forum is no different -- in fact, that's what it's for! Yes, all LDRs don't work out, but neither do all real-life ones. Why do LDRs fail? For the most part, for the same reasons face-to-face ones also don't make the grade -- lack of trust, commitment, shared values, honesty, and communication. Were I you, would I spend the next six months trying to get to know someone better that I've already met, am attracted to, and know is mutually-attracted to me -- even if meant have to do it long-distance? Certainly! What would I (or you!) have to lose? The worst that could happen is the relationship doesn't progress. So what? The best that could happen is that you hit it off big time, then in the fall have the luxury many in LDRs don't have so easily -- to be able to near each other and continue your relationship back at school. Besides, who says you have to wait six months to see each other, again? There's no reason sometime this summer you can't plan a visit or an outing and see if the two of you "still click." Personally, I would rather take the chance and see how things go, rather than spending my life wondering "what if?" But, you need to make that decision. All I am saying, is that don't let some of the horror stories you may read on this forum make you think there aren't just as many people out there happy with the path they chose. Best, TMichaels Edited February 20, 2008 by TMichaels
iSmiley Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 (edited) 2 hours or 3 hours is not long at all. My bf lives in canada and am at UK. Next year..i be in Borneo island and he will still be in Canada. Does it bother us? No..its all about commitment and how you feel for each other. PLUS 6 months is not long at all. Then again, if its time spending w/o ur love..a minute even feels like a hour T-T Spend time with her thru webcam, voice chat or better..jus go to see her..2/3 hours..not that bad..correction..pretty good for LDR. Don't worry so much abt what others have said. This is your life..ur chapter..anything could happen- good or bad. If its bad, jus b a man and take it as a learning experience. If you dun try and jus get freak out by wat other said..then you will never hit the jackpot. Either you seize your chance or live your life wondering how life would have changed if you decides not to pursue it. ^^ GOOD LUCK! Edited February 20, 2008 by iSmiley
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