Ariadne Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 example, offering better commentary on his performance...You're so right that "true love" takes time and work. More like make him your btch. He has the passion thing going for him. And no, I don't think true love requires work at all, but it grows with time. Later (have to go to work now..grrrr)
Author spookie Posted February 18, 2008 Author Posted February 18, 2008 OMG... Is it terrible that I laughed? At least he provides comic relief. I think I mentioned to you in another thread that I once dated a guy with Asperger's and he was also a nightmare in bed (but not to such a comical degree). I warned you, Spookie! He was the worst kisser I've ever had. He would make movements with his mouth like a fish. No rhythm whatsoever or natural responsiveness to what the other was doing. Everything was forced and unnatural. He once told me that he had a running commentary in his head during sex and couldn't let himself just experience the moment. In turn he tried to overcompensate by feigning extreme passion. He also expressed a desire to be "pegged," but I wouldn't stand for it. He confessed that he had once stuffed a cherry up his ass. I was so emotionally and sexually scarred by being with him, that for a few months after our breakup I had no interest in sex whatsoever. I got paranoid that every guy I encountered harbored a hidden well of kinky desires and weird fetishes that he would spring on me once we became intimate. LMAO. That's Mr. AS, to a tee. Mine has also mentioned the running sex dialogue, how he coudln't turn it off, and how there was also a timer in his head that indicated when he ought to change movements lest he bore me. He also keeps a running commentary regarding everything we do, in and out of the sack, in a google document that he shares with me. It's organized both by time and event type. It's pretty creepy to read.
SpanksTheMonkey Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 [quote=oppath;1538004 But jumping Jesus on a pogo stick, . oppath may I use your Jesus for a quote? as mine is kinda worn out from all the gridiron? lol.. Sorry OT for a min there ok back to reality um last I saw spookie was happy with this guy even buying Lego's no? Sounds like your life is going at full speed there just be careful with the heavy drugs.
shadowplay Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 (edited) LMAO. That's Mr. AS, to a tee. Mine has also mentioned the running sex dialogue, how he coudln't turn it off, and how there was also a timer in his head that indicated when he ought to change movements lest he bore me. He also keeps a running commentary regarding everything we do, in and out of the sack, in a google document that he shares with me. It's organized both by time and event type. It's pretty creepy to read. OMG. Run, Spookie...RUN. I hate to see it because I feel sorry for him and he's a nice person, but this guy is creepy as fck. I wouldn't have been able to put up with him as long as you have. Don't wait around to see what other creepy surprises he has in store for you. Edited February 18, 2008 by shadowplay
Art_Critic Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 OMG. Run, Spookie...RUN. I hate to see it because I feel sorry for him, but this guy is creepy. I wouldn't have been able to put up with him as long as you have. Don't wait around to see what more creepy surprises he has in store for you. The guy has Asperger's Disorder .. there is no need to beat him up..He isn't being creepy.. He is acting like he has Asperger's. Spooky knew what Asperger's Disorder was before she went into the relationship so there is no reason to beat the guy up for a condition that she knew about before getting involved with him. I remember a thread she posted about Asperger's Disorder where she did all this research on it and asked the posters of LS about getting involved with someone like that.. Spooky.. Leave the guy alone at this point.. Remember that he has Asperger's Disorder and treat his actions with that in mind...
shadowplay Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 (edited) The guy has Asperger's Disorder .. there is no need to beat him up..He isn't being creepy.. He is acting like he has Asperger's. Spooky knew what Asperger's Disorder was before she went into the relationship so there is no reason to beat the guy up for a condition that she knew about before getting involved with him. I remember a thread she posted about Asperger's Disorder where she did all this research on it and asked the posters of LS about getting involved with someone like that.. Spooky.. Leave the guy alone at this point.. Remember that he has Asperger's Disorder and treat his actions with that in mind... I know his behavior is because of his disorder, but unfortunately that doesn't make it any less creepy. It is only natural for Spookie to react the way she does. It would take an extremely patient person to want to be with someone like that. Edited February 18, 2008 by shadowplay
Replicant Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 It is only natural for Spookie to react the way she does. Not exactly, she went into this well informed and with her eyes wide open with what to expect from him. To draw him in any further is not right. If she's going to self destruct she should either do it alone or work at fixing her own problems. Otherwise she's not adding any qualities to this guys life by keeping him like a pet then manipulating him like a tool when she needs to be brought up.
Art_Critic Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 It would take an extremely patient person to want to be with someone like that. I do agree with you shadowplay.. it would take someone who was very patient to be with someone who has that disorder.. There was a poster a few years ago that had AS.. because of my run in's with him here on LS I read up on AS and became more aware of that type of personality and how to socially interact with an AS.. The poster no longer posts ( or at least I don't think he does ) but I did learn to be more empathetic towards someone like him... If I may ask.. Your post to Spookie on her thread about AS was this : http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=1470182&postcount=42 Here is the thread by the way... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=140043 Do you think she finally saw thru his wall and now sees that there isn't much there ?
Author spookie Posted February 18, 2008 Author Posted February 18, 2008 I think it's a tad bit unfair that the general consensus is that I'm trying to fk with this guy's head, and that I'm not respecting his condition in some way. He might have Asperger's, but he's also an adult, I've been honest with him, and IMO the people that think I need to leave him the fk alone cause he's so delicate are the ones who aren't being respectful. Cause, just like everyone else, he deserves to experience all this, the good and the bad. Human interaction. I think I've tried to be understanding of his condition. If I hadn't tried, I'd have run at the first indication of non-normal behavior. But TBH it doesn't bother me that much. I think it's funny, but I don't think it's wrong that I can laugh at it; I laugh at myself all the time, after all, in the most self-depracating kind of way; that ought to be sufficient proof that I'm non-discriminatory in whom I make fun of. What bothers me about Mr. AS is our apparent lack of chemistry - and I don't know that that's even related to his "condition". I haven't worked out yet how I want to act. There's how I feel, and then there's good points that my mind, and Ariadne, for example, are making. If I am taking too long with this breakup/nonbreakup, it's because I don't know what the right decision is, not because I want to mess with this guy's head.
shadowplay Posted February 18, 2008 Posted February 18, 2008 I do agree with you shadowplay.. it would take someone who was very patient to be with someone who has that disorder.. There was a poster a few years ago that had AS.. because of my run in's with him here on LS I read up on AS and became more aware of that type of personality and how to socially interact with an AS.. The poster no longer posts ( or at least I don't think he does ) but I did learn to be more empathetic towards someone like him... If I may ask.. Your post to Spookie on her thread about AS was this : http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showpost.php?p=1470182&postcount=42 Here is the thread by the way... http://www.loveshack.org/forums/showthread.php?t=140043 Do you think she finally saw thru his wall and now sees that there isn't much there ? It seems that the bigger problem in his case is awkwardness, lack of confidence and submissiveness -- not as much emotional unavailability. Were she to accept those flaws, I suspect his emotional flatness might become a problem down the road as she started to crave a deeper connection. I can only speak from my own experience. I'm someone who needs deep intimacy to be happy in a relationship. Someone with Asperger's would frustrate the heck out of me. I believe that people with Asperger's usually have shallower emotions, even deep down. That doesn't mean they're not human, but they can be hard for normal people to relate to.
Ariadne Posted March 2, 2008 Posted March 2, 2008 Ahhh.... And I never get into arguments with people. I don't like it, it makes me very stressed. And now I did. I go to check on my two washers (to make sure someone is not trying to empty them)... And I find another woman, a third person, emptying the other two washers of the girl that was after me watching for those. So I told her, why are you emptying the clothes? Don't you see she has a whole bunch more to wash? You are interrupting her laundry. Well, she's not here she says. I'm like, you can't sit here all day waiting for these to finish so that people like you don't come and take the clothes out (I know). I'm using these two machines and I have a whole lot more to wash when these are finished. Sorry, but I have to work she says. So she started this big argument and then the girl shows up, and the woman goes call the manager to tell her that is ok to remove the clothes from the washers etc. Sigh! What stress...
Ariadne Posted March 2, 2008 Posted March 2, 2008 Oh no! Now I'm afraid to go get my clothes maybe that woman put ink in my clothes or dirt or something. People are so crazy. If I see her I'll apologize or something. What crap.
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