Jons511 Posted February 13, 2008 Posted February 13, 2008 Need on a breakup! I need some advice; I appreciate your help! I had been going out with this girl since December. We are both 25, and we were starting to fall in love with eachother (we said I love you to eachother). Then this mess happened: I messed up really badly this past weekend. Saturday night she went out with her friends, I was upset that I couldn't go with her, so I stayed home and got wasted. When she came home, I didnt want anything to do with her, so I ignored her and went to bed. She cried herself to sleep probably feeling rejected. The next day (Sunday), we worked out our differences, and things seemed to be OK. However I was still drunk from the night before. She told me I left a glass of liquor on the computer desk, and I should drink it so it didnt go to waste. I drank it (full tall glass of Bacardi Limon), and became "re-drunk" (getting more drunk when being still drunk from the night before). We started arguing again and I made the biggest mistake of my life, I called her a "****ing whore". She was obviously very upset. I tried in my drunk state to make things better, but only made them worse. After that we drove (still fighting of course) to her cousin's apartment. I attempted to make things better while there, but also kept drinking. I basically had a liter of wine to myself. I attempted to get close to her, but she didnt want me to, making a scene in front of her cousin. After this I fell asleep on the bathroom floor after vomiting three times. Once we got back to her house, I kept trying to make things better. She didnt want to talk about it that night, so I got loud and beliggerent. I woke her mom and her brother up, and was so emotional and bothered that I started crying until I finally fell asleep. How embarrasing! The next day I brought her flowers and wrote her a nice note. Then we talked and she stated that she didnt even know if she could be my friend anymore after this. She said she wanted to break up with me, and see if I can handle being her friend before we could ever get back together. I apologized and said that I would prove to her that I love her and that this will NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN. (I have never been that drunk/angry in my life!) I asked her if I could prove it to her over the next few weeks if she would get back with me. Her answer was "why wouldn't I?" but it honestly didnt sound that convincing. Because I am staying at her house, she said I am still welcome to stay here, but I have to sleep on the couch. I also asked her if I could still make her dinner on Valentines day, and still take her out Friday night (we had plans), and she said yes, but said that we would be just friends when we go out. My question is: Is she just testing me or is this really over? I have some reasons why I think this is all a test which I list below. I want to keep trying unless its hopeless. How hard should I try to get back with her on Valentines day or Friday night when we go out? This is one of the reasons I think this is just a test: Last night (Monday), we watched a movie together. She kept asking me to get her things (water, food, etc...), so I said "You're going to make me work for this aren't you?". She said "Yes I am".
D-Lish Posted February 13, 2008 Posted February 13, 2008 I think she is just very, very angry. Being called a f**king Wh*re by your bf would be super hurtful. Yes, your behaviour was out of control. Just because she wanted to go out with her friends didn't mean she was rejecting or abandoning you.... but that is how you chose to see it. She only wanted to have a little bit of time with her friends, and you chose to punish her for that. I would have a problem if my bf pulled a stunt like that with me too. I suggest that you do go out of your way to make it up to her. I also suggest that you don't drink that much again.... Okay, you messed up and you don't need people to keep bashing you for it. I do think you need to tread lightly for the next little while. I am quite sure you shocked and hurt her. Your words won't make things better, but your actions will. You need to show her that this incident was a one time deal....
Author Jons511 Posted February 13, 2008 Author Posted February 13, 2008 Yes but does this mean I still have a chance if I can prove it to her? Or is she just saying that so I dont go crazy?
D-Lish Posted February 13, 2008 Posted February 13, 2008 I think if you guys have an established relationship, some good history together and you make a concerted effort to make up for the damage that you can save this.
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