Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 How crazy is that? Her bday, they vday right after...this might be a hard week. I'm going to hold tight on no contact, however, because if I hear her voice, I'll go crazy no matter what she says. Just something to put out there for everybody. I was having real issues with "how would she take it" if I called, or didn't call, or whether I should text, and what that would mean as opposed to calling, should I make it short, what would that mean, how many words should I use, should I sound caring or carefree, blah, blah, etc., etc. Bottom line, whatever you do is gonna be construed negatively, especially if there's no hope for the relationship. So do what YOU want and don't worry how they take it. I have decided to not contact at all, either day. I think it will get me over a big hump.
WakeUpPeople Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 DONT CALLLLLLLLLLLLLLL, dont text dont nothing, its no contract for a reason sometimes the best times to call is the worse time to call. If she really loved u, believe me bro she is going to feel it, trust me I know from first hand experience. Its hard to lose a love one but life keeps going and u will meet new ppl trust me I would know.....you'll get over it....But keep doing no contact and disappear from her life with no where abouts, practice not caring it also works like a change and dont let her words mess with you logic, when she tells u things that u wanna hear...action speak louder than words. try not to contact her until your completely heal and over her and depending on the relationship and what she did never contact her...
underpants Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 I read some of your prior posts. It seems you dumped her because you didn't know what you wanted or that you could not fully give her what she needs or stuff like that. So, no don't call her or her birthday and don't do anything for her on Valentine's Day. To do so would only send vague and mixed messages.
CalamitousJane Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 Haohmaru, Have you told her exactly what you've told us? I think she deserves that, at some point. And I think you deserve hearing what she has to say to you too. Maybe after V-day though... I think NC is great, but only after everything is said that needs to be. I KNOW my ex cares about me, and I KNOW he can't give me what I want in a relationship right now. Not needing to wonder about either of those things brings me a great deal of peace.
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 Normally I guess I'd say the same thing, Jane, but this chick is a tough one. I've never seen anybody just get over stuff so quickly as she does. I would bet that she's way farther ahead in this process than me, even though I did the dumping, and even though she professed her love to me.
CalamitousJane Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 Even if that's the case, it would probably be good for you to know, instead of wondering. It's always better in the long run when both sides know the whole truth.
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 What is it exactly I need to know? I don't think there's one bit of information that would be positive for me to know. 1. If she's moved on, I'm gonna be crushed 2. If she still loves me, I'm gonna be crushed cuz I haven't had a chance to grow up yet 3. If she treats me like ****, I'm gonna be crushed 4. If she treats me nicely, I'm gonna be crushed cuz that means she's moved on and is dating Travis Barker or somebody
LOVE DAISIES Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 Hao...if you don't mind me asking, how old are you?
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 27...why? Says the message must be at least 10 characters. That's a stupid rule.
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 No, no daisies! You have to tell me why...
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 Because now I'm at a disadvantage. But cmon! Really, I came on this board to learn about myself and if you explain your reasoning you might help me realize something I didn't know before. Only a woman can be so cruel!
LOVE DAISIES Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 I was just wondering....I have NO ulterior motives..and I am NOT a cruel woman I assure you. Now if you said you're 57 ..I'd be worried.. LOL
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 WHY were you wondering? What made you wonder? Why didn't you ask anybody else their age??? You are being cruel!!
LOVE DAISIES Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 WHY were you wondering? What made you wonder? Why didn't you ask anybody else their age??? You are being cruel!! LOL.You're right..I have been a complete witch. I apologize....how can I make it up to you?
CalamitousJane Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 What is it exactly I need to know? I don't think there's one bit of information that would be positive for me to know. 1. If she's moved on, I'm gonna be crushed 2. If she still loves me, I'm gonna be crushed cuz I haven't had a chance to grow up yet 3. If she treats me like ****, I'm gonna be crushed 4. If she treats me nicely, I'm gonna be crushed cuz that means she's moved on and is dating Travis Barker or somebody Yeah, you'll be crushed, but you need to be otherwise you'll never rise from the ashes/grow up. I spent years, or perhaps decades, avoiding being crushed by avoiding the truth, and all I did during that time was make the same mistake over and over. Seriously, I hope she's dating Travis Barker. The visuals on that one should help you get over her REAL fast.
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 Jane, u r cruel. Love, u r cruel. Only women... And you say men are the mean ones...
LOVE DAISIES Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 Who is Travis Barker?? Is he a well hung porn star???
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 You know what...actually you're not cruel...you gals are making me glad that I dumped that @#*$#...and I know what women are capable of, so I'm gonna dump 20,000 more! One of my biggest problems, DAISIES, was that my ex would NEVER answer a question until I'd asked it like 400 times! Men hate that and you women know we hate it, so you do it more... And YOU, Jane! Why would you hope she's dating Travis Barker? You don't know the crap we went thru with him. But thanks. I have more inspiration to become as rich and famous as I possibly can be now. Thank you! Thank you for freeing me from the bonds of the vagina...
LOVE DAISIES Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 You know what...actually you're not cruel...you gals are making me glad that I dumped that @#*$#...and I know what women are capable of, so I'm gonna dump 20,000 more! One of my biggest problems, DAISIES, was that my ex would NEVER answer a question until I'd asked it like 400 times! Men hate that and you women know we hate it, so you do it more... And YOU, Jane! Why would you hope she's dating Travis Barker? You don't know the crap we went thru with him. But thanks. I have more inspiration to become as rich and famous as I possibly can be now. Thank you! Thank you for freeing me from the bonds of the vagina... Yikes....And here I thought WOMEN were sensitive to being asked their age!!!!
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 I wish you were here so I could seduce you and dump you... I read your other posts...I hope he dumps you too...OWs have to have a cruel streak in them...yellow, weak, spineless people...
underpants Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 I wish you were here so I could seduce you and dump you... Lucky ex, no? Well, my birthday is tomorrow do you want to wish me a happy one?
Author Haohmaru Posted February 12, 2008 Author Posted February 12, 2008 No, because you are sticking your pitchfork in my pain. I thought we were here to help each other.
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