Author SimpleyMe Posted February 16, 2008 Author Posted February 16, 2008 Yes she emailed me at my email the same one i used to send her the message. I have sent her only one message,she replied to the message that i sent her,but i seen no point in responding,I only wanted to make my point not play email tag with her. So yes she emails me today saying HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND i didnt respond,im not sure why she told me that,is she pretending to be nice to me so i won't tell her H or is she trying to play games with me? She did not put anything else just HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND.
MakeLemonade Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 That is just downright odd. Cryptic like I said. I also considered the a$$-kissing possibility so you wouldn't tell. I don't agree with blocking her email - if she sends you things you need to KNOW about it. She may be trying to bait you, she may be like some of the OW on here in NC withdrawals and trying to get you to respond perhaps with some plans you and your hubby may have together, just to get some little scrap of a glimpse into what HE is doing this weekend since he won't have anything to do with her anymore. You know, she may be hoping just out of spite you might come back with something, just hoping to hurt her, but in her mind, that is better than nothing. Just a thought. Hard to say.
bentnotbroken Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 I wouldn't respond to anything she has to say and I would save all e-mails from her in case she turns into a bunny boiler,like the ow in my case.
MakeLemonade Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 Glenn Close - the crazy OW boils the bunny on the stove in Fatal Attraction.
whichwayisup Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 You did good. Now maybe you and your husband can tell her husband together. He has a right to know so that he can maked an informed choice about her. Yup I agree. Yes she emailed me at my email the same one i used to send her the message. I have sent her only one message,she replied to the message that i sent her,but i seen no point in responding,I only wanted to make my point not play email tag with her. So yes she emails me today saying HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND i didnt respond,im not sure why she told me that,is she pretending to be nice to me so i won't tell her H or is she trying to play games with me? She did not put anything else just HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND. Ignore the email, she's probably done that on purpose to piss you off. Remember, she doesn't care one bit what you think or feel. She's freaky and honestly, I think BNB is right, consider telling her husband. Let's put it this way, if you get one more email from her, both of you talk to her husband and let him in on his wife's behaviour and what she's been doing.
MakeLemonade Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 I personally don't understand all these posters who are so hell-bent on getting you to tell her husband. I really don't see what that is going to accomplish as far as your relationship and your healing - and isn't that what REALLY matters right now? To me, telling him is just perpetuating a cycle of negativity. And unless she continues to pursue your H, which as of now she isn't, unless it is vicariously thru you, I would just focus on you and yours. JMHO.
White Flower Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 ML might be right. If I sent an email to my MM's W and had no or minimal contact with MM, I would think my existence didn't matter if it went unacknowledged. I would have to swallow my pride and give up. Alternately, it is encouraging to hear your H tell you he's through with her and to give you control over the sitch. Do you think he finds your concern needy? Or do you think he feels he's proving himself to you by allowing you to handle it? Think about it, but I'm sure you know what's best for you.
bentnotbroken Posted February 16, 2008 Posted February 16, 2008 I personally don't understand all these posters who are so hell-bent on getting you to tell her husband. I really don't see what that is going to accomplish as far as your relationship and your healing - and isn't that what REALLY matters right now? To me, telling him is just perpetuating a cycle of negativity. And unless she continues to pursue your H, which as of now she isn't, unless it is vicariously thru you, I would just focus on you and yours. JMHO. Life isn't just about "what about me" it is doing what is right for others also. Letting her husband know will also help her to heal, as she can then move on and only focus on her life. It doesn't have to accomplish anything for her, but it will help the husband to make an informed choice as to whether or not he wants to stay with a liar, who is still in hot pursuit of another man while she is pretending to reconcile with him.
LILA BELL Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 I Dont Think You Should Tell Ow Husband Of The Affair, I Question Your Motives For This Are You Only Wanting To Tell Her Husband Just To Get Back At Her For Having A Affair With Your Husband. You Can't Blame Her For Your Husband Straying Obviously If He Were Happy With You He Would Not Have Strayed In The First Place. Try And Fix Your Own Marriage Before You Try And Break Up Someone Else's Marriage.
LILA BELL Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Btw I Have A Question For You Why Are The Wives Always Out To Get The Ow? Why Not Go After Your Husband He Is The One Who Is Married To You,ow Had No Obligation Towards You. Are All Wives Jealous Of Ow Do We Make You Feel Insecure Are You Only With Your Husband So He Wont Be With The Ow Is That The Reason You Took Him Back? I Guess Im Just Looking For The Wives Point Of View On The Other Woman.
Florida Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Yes she emailed me at my email the same one i used to send her the message. I have sent her only one message,she replied to the message that i sent her,but i seen no point in responding,I only wanted to make my point not play email tag with her. So yes she emails me today saying HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND i didnt respond,im not sure why she told me that,is she pretending to be nice to me so i won't tell her H or is she trying to play games with me? She did not put anything else just HAVE A GOOD WEEKEND. You know the first thing I thought when I read that? She is going to do something really evil to you soon, or wants you to think that. That isn't ass kissing, that's completely ominous. Carry some mace with you, be aware of your surrondings, check your back seat before you get in the car, hell-check under the car too!
D-Lish Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 I agree that your husband deserves some of your anger in all of this. I think it's a good move that he came clean and is working at repairing your marriage. I would imagine it must be hard to repair your marriage while this woman lingers and continues to make advances. Did you do the wrong thing by confronting her? I certainly don't think so. I would expect that she would have backed off as soon as he told her it was over. I would be a bit worried about the fall out. You can never be too careful. I don't think you'll be able to concentrate on getting your marriage back on track until she is out of the picture. You should be focusing on your marriage- not the woman he had an affair with. It's a distraction that will inhibit the healing process. You don't need to be fighting with her. If I had been in your position I would have been angry and probably would have lashed out myself. Are you mad at your husband at all??? He did play a major role in this mess too....and I think that deserves some of your anger and energy. I hope it works out.
Lookingforward Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Try And Fix Your Own Marriage Before You Try And Break Up Someone Else's Marriage. gosh, maybe the OW should have thought of that too ? and btw , any particular reason you capitalise every word ?
LILA BELL Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Because i was to lazy to press the caps button....anything else you want to know?
Lookingforward Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 snip from another thread> I cheat because i can and i get away with it . i know some of you will not like that,but its the truth. My H believes everything i tell him i know i can get away with it so i do it .<snip No, think I already have seen enough thanks Maybe you need to do some thinking about what side of the fence you're posting from ?
bentnotbroken Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 I Dont Think You Should Tell Ow Husband Of The Affair, I Question Your Motives For This Are You Only Wanting To Tell Her Husband Just To Get Back At Her For Having A Affair With Your Husband. You Can't Blame Her For Your Husband Straying Obviously If He Were Happy With You He Would Not Have Strayed In The First Place. Try And Fix Your Own Marriage Before You Try And Break Up Someone Else's Marriage. It doesn't matter what her motives are. What were the ow motives in sleeping with her husband? The ow is the breaking up her marriage. Her husband deserves to know if his wife is playing exchange bodily fluids with someone else. He should have the opportunity to decide if he wants to do the same thing or leave her. He should be able to decide his future, not her. He also needs to be tested for stds because if she is a repeat offender,she could be exposing him to life threatening diseases. Why didn't you try to fix your marriage before you tried to break MM's?
bentnotbroken Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Btw I Have A Question For You Why Are The Wives Always Out To Get The Ow? Why Not Go After Your Husband He Is The One Who Is Married To You,ow Had No Obligation Towards You. Are All Wives Jealous Of Ow Do We Make You Feel Insecure Are You Only With Your Husband So He Wont Be With The Ow Is That The Reason You Took Him Back? I Guess Im Just Looking For The Wives Point Of View On The Other Woman. The one in my situation is psycho and I didn't blame him and told him to get the hell out and never come back.
bentnotbroken Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Because i was to lazy to press the caps button....anything else you want to know? :laugh::laugh::laugh:
EnigmaXOXO Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Letting her husband know will also help her to heal, as she can then move on and only focus on her life. I agree. If her preoccupation with the two of you continues to become more and more of an obsession, I’d absolutely let her husband know what’s going on so that someone on her side could help manage the situation instead of the two of you. You have enough on your plate to deal with as is. Besides, if she’s busy plugging holes in her own marriage, she’ll have less free time on her hands to worry so much about what’s going on in yours. Good luck with your recovery from this and moving on, however it turns out.
MakeLemonade Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 I agree. If her preoccupation with the two of you continues to become more and more of an obsession, I’d absolutely let her husband know what’s going on so that someone on her side could help manage the situation instead of the two of you. You have enough on your plate to deal with as is. Besides, if she’s busy plugging holes in her own marriage, she’ll have less free time on her hands to worry so much about what’s going on in yours. Good luck with your recovery from this and moving on, however it turns out. Or her husband will say f-u and leave her and then she is after your H again with nothing to temper or stop her. Leave it alone as long as she leaves your H alone.
EnigmaXOXO Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Or her husband will say f-u and leave her and then she is after your H again with nothing to temper or stop her. Well, if that’s the kind of human being she’s married too, than her life would be better off without him or others like him in it. If that should happen (which I doubt) he may actually be doing her a favor. When finding out your life and home has been invaded by loonies, than you hardly need to go out looking to make more enemies, anyway. They always seem to have this uncanny knack for finding ‘you’ ... all on their own.
MakeLemonade Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 A well placed harassment/restraining order would take care of that quite nicely. Yes, it would, but it seems she is leaving him alone now w/o any of that - all peaceful like - why blow that by going to the H now and stirring it all up again. Let her/them deal with their R and the OP should deal with and heal hers for now. That's all I am saying. I know in a perfect world her hubby should know too, he may already - he may not - we don't even know that. I just think it will re-stir the shirtstorm that seems to be dying down, and I don't really think that is best, er, HEALTHIEST for now. JMHO, as always.
EnigmaXOXO Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 Yes, it would, but it seems she is leaving him alone now w/o any of that You must have missed post #48. Only about five days ago. It's funny but as i was writing the update i checked my emails and i got an email from her telling me to have a good weekend,im not sure what to think of this. This other woman is still attempting to maintain contact with this family through email. Now via the wife. It’s not over. She’s ill.
MakeLemonade Posted February 20, 2008 Posted February 20, 2008 You must have missed post #48. Only about five days ago. This other woman is still attempting to maintain contact with this family through email. Now via the wife. It’s not over. She’s ill. I didn't miss it, I responded to it actually . One email saying Have a Nice Weekend, doesn't warrant confronting her hubby and possibly getting a restraining order. It is odd for sure. But in my mind, she needs to be on the lookout for more for sure, but still, should wait before stirring up the shirtstorm again. It just wasn't enough to warrant it.
Recommended Posts