Walk Posted February 12, 2008 Posted February 12, 2008 Maybe it is best for him to do something really repulsive in the very beginning to get it out of the way. Like throw up on you. It could only go uphill from there. A (ex) crush of mine projectile vomited shrimp goo onto me.
Zolie Posted February 13, 2008 Posted February 13, 2008 My friends and I coined this term a few years ago. It seems that, if you are really into someone, you cannot be physically repulsed by them (no matter what they do or how they look). However, if you're not that into someone, you can be repulsed quite quickly. I agree 100%! When I first married my husband I thought he was perfection personified. But by the end, even his sneezing irritated me. And other things repulsed me that never bothered me in the early days. I'm sure he would say the same about me, even though we have a friendly relationship to this day. (we just can't stand to live together, lol) On the other end of the spectrum, I dated a man whom I was very into, but who had a particular body feature I normally do *not* care for: lot's of body hair everywhere but on his head, lol. I prefer my men with hair on their head and very little on their bodies. This man was almost bald, and had a virtual forest of coarse, curly hair, on his chest and even a little on his back. I was turned off by it at first, but was already powerfully attracted to him as a person by the time I discovered the forest, so I accepted it. And before long I actually grew to like it!
blackbird Posted February 13, 2008 Posted February 13, 2008 I agree with the OP. One big thing for me is scent. When I'm still in love with someone, or at least strongly attracted to them, I'll adore how they smell. (I'm not talking about their colognes and deodorants, but their natural scent.) When I find myself being repulsed by their natural scent, in the past, that's been the death rattle for me. And it's this strong physical repulsion; I literally cannot stand the scent, even if it's exactly how they smelled when I first met them. And definitely true that someone I'm really in love with could do nothing to repulse me. I don't want to say it's like a mother-child relationship, but it's something similar -- the unconditional aspect of it, I suppose. Except for, there must be conditions I suppose, otherwise it wouldn't change. Or is that, as someone said earlier in this post, just about the emotions 'wearing off'? What interests me is the process of how this happens, how you can go from finding everything your SO does to be endearing, to being disgusted when they try to kiss you. I guess it's different for every relationship, but there must be similarities in breaking points... I have some personal theories, based on whether one views one's SO/relationship as being static/stagnant or dynamic/capable of progression, i.e. how much 'in a rut' you feel, but nothing solid yet.
Mustang Sally Posted February 13, 2008 Posted February 13, 2008 I agree with the OP. One big thing for me is scent. When I'm still in love with someone, or at least strongly attracted to them, I'll adore how they smell. (I'm not talking about their colognes and deodorants, but their natural scent.) When I find myself being repulsed by their natural scent, in the past, that's been the death rattle for me. And it's this strong physical repulsion; I literally cannot stand the scent, even if it's exactly how they smelled when I first met them. And definitely true that someone I'm really in love with could do nothing to repulse me. I don't want to say it's like a mother-child relationship, but it's something similar -- the unconditional aspect of it, I suppose. Except for, there must be conditions I suppose, otherwise it wouldn't change. Or is that, as someone said earlier in this post, just about the emotions 'wearing off'? What interests me is the process of how this happens, how you can go from finding everything your SO does to be endearing, to being disgusted when they try to kiss you. I guess it's different for every relationship, but there must be similarities in breaking points... I have some personal theories, based on whether one views one's SO/relationship as being static/stagnant or dynamic/capable of progression, i.e. how much 'in a rut' you feel, but nothing solid yet.Why don't you start a thread on this, blackbird? (Obviously I'd be very interested in hearing what your theories are.)
Recommended Posts