Travis300 Posted February 10, 2008 Posted February 10, 2008 (edited) I've usually been pretty quiet about the last relationship I was in...I havn't been able to talk to anyone I know personally about it because its so hard..I just cry...but here it goes.. I'm a guy..23 years old, and she's 20..We met in march of 2006, and kinda hit it off right away, but we never dated up until September of 2007..we just kept it as friends, even though we both had a thing for each other for the longest time..I don't know why it took that long, but it did. I honestly didnt think it'd work out from the start for some reason, because I thought we had just known each other for too long...but i did, for only 3 months. I'd been in relationships before..once almost a year...but i never felt the way I did about her, as I did with anyone else...i couldn't even sleep at night sometimes if she wasn't next to me. Every time I'd leave her house, I'd be in tears driving home. I was also the first guy she'd been involved with sexually too. Whenever I wasn't with her, we were either talking on the phone, texting, or on the computer..I seriously was happier than I'd ever been in my life with her, and was really starting to think I'd end up marrying her....... ...Then after 3 months, she ended it..saying she thinks we're just better off as friends for now....well, its been 2 months since then..and I miss her more now than I could have possibly even imagined...every night, i just lay in bed for hours thinking about her and almost have to cry myself to sleep...I have to go to work on almost 3 hours of sleep sometimes, and all day when I'm at work, she's the only thing i can think about..whenever i hear any of the songs she used to play when i was around, I can't do anythng but sit there and cry...I cant even see her name, or the car she drives, or anything that reminds me of her without crying to the point that I just wanna crawl into a hole and die...I love her more than anything in the world, I would do absolutely anything for her and she was the only girl I've ever said I Love You too, and actually meant it from the bottom of my heart... Now, I know they say sometimes its good to see other people after a breakup...so I tried going out with other girls, but its a joke and I feel like im lying to myself when I try to have a good time without her. I've gotten to the point where I'm not satisfied with anyone unless they are EXACTLY like her...I'll get home from being with another girl, and just feel nothing at all inside..before, during, and after all I can think about is her. ..I also made a huge mistake about a month after we broke up. We still talked all the time on the phone and all, but I made the mistake of talking to a girl that we both hated pretty badly prior to this..and it went pretty far, to the point of sex. I NEVER met up with her, and never had sex with her, but she doesn't believe me...well, this girl ended up telling my ex the whole thing...and that just completely killed it for the both of us. Since then, its been so strange and different...its nothing like it used to be. She can barely look at me anymore, and whenever we talk..its short lived..and just about nothing.. I just don't know what to do now..because she is seeing another guy. I don't know how to tell her how much I love her..and how much I want to be with her again. I've tried, somewhat, a couple weeks ago, but it was like she didn't wanna hear it...although after we talked, she said she ended up going home and writing me a 9 page letter about everything on the computer..but never sent it to me. How do I go about this?...I know everyone is gonna say "You have to move on", but I can't..I'm sitting her in tears just typing this right now...I don't want to love anyone else. Should I just wait to see what happens? Or do I tell her how I feel??... This is the worst...I've never been truly in love with a girl until I met her..I really..really don't want to lose her. Edited February 10, 2008 by Travis300
eagle5 Posted February 11, 2008 Posted February 11, 2008 Hi Travis, I feel for you, you're having a sh*t time and can't see life beyond her. I'm not going to say 'you have to move on' but you need to use this time for yourself. What I mean by that is you are in a situation you never asked for and you have no control over that, but you do have control over what you do with this time. She may come back, she may not, but either way YOU are the most important person in the world at the moment. Look after no.1, you'll be a better person whatever the outcome. You love her like crazy, that's obvious, but at the moment she's not seeing that or at least she's not reciprocating those feelings, there's nothing you can do about that, so do things with your time you have that'll help you, like join a gym, get out with friends etc. Going out with other girls is a short term fix while you still have feeling for her so leave that for a while. I'm a believer in nc and that's something you should look at doing too. Time WILL help, take one day at a time and don't feel bad about shedding tears, whatever the outcome I wish you the best, keep strong man.....Eagle
Author Travis300 Posted February 11, 2008 Author Posted February 11, 2008 Thanks a lot for responding...thats really what I needed to hear. I asked somewhere else..and everyone told me to move on and just get over her...and I just can't accept that right now...I just got done talking to her for about 2 hours, so hopefully thats a good start.
eagle5 Posted February 11, 2008 Posted February 11, 2008 Certainly could be mate, keep positive, no matter how hard things may be in the future (hopefully not), I wish you all the best, keep us posted....
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