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So-called best friend?


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Posted

I need some clear-headed advice here because I'm FUMING about this and wanted to see what other people think.

 

My best friend and I have been close for about 12 years (minus a 2-3 year break where we didn't speak). She and her husband moved into my city a few years ago, and we've become particularly close.

 

I have also been dating someone seriously (albeit VERY off & on) for the past 8 years. Since my friend & her husband have moved to my area, they also became fairly close with my significant other. The 4 of us would frequently do things together. My SO & I have been "off" for about a year, but we've remained close.

 

Things have been going very badly w/ the ex-SO of late. I have done pretty well at not involving my best friend & her husband in the situation, since they are friends with him too.

 

However - there was a particularly bad incident last weekend. I called my girlfriend, telling her that I needed some "girl time" and to please call me back since I would be pretty available this week. I didn't hear from her. I didn't leave anything on the message about what it was about.

 

I called her on Friday evening to see what they were up to. Didn't hear from her at all. I find out later that she & her husband when out with my ex-SO.

 

I left her a message yesterday saying, "Hey, left you two messages and haven't heard from you. Hope things are OK." I didn't mention that I knew they she had gone out with my ex.

 

She sends me a text saying "I'm sorry I haven't gotten back to you, I haven't been feeling well this week. I'll try to call you later." Didn't hear from her.

 

Right now, I'm pretty ticked off & of the opinion that the ball is in her court. Am I overreacting here?

Posted

Yes, the ball is in her court.

 

And yes, I'd be ticked off since she lied to you a bit. She said she wasn't feeling well and that's why she hadn't gotten back to you, but she was out on Friday night, so she wasn't feeling that bad. Of course, it could just be that she wasn't feeling well earlier in the week when you first got in touch, and then she was already out on Friday night and didn't want to get into all that in a text.

 

If you've been friends that long, give her the benefit of the doubt and see what she says when she gets back in touch.

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