moontides Posted February 8, 2008 Posted February 8, 2008 I'm a 22 year old girl who's never been in a serious relationship....it's probably depressing me more now than ever. In general, I have confidence about myself. I used to have issues with whether I was pretty or not, but that has gone away with age, and plenty of my friends think I'm cute. The only thing that I'm still somewhat hung up on is that I'm 5'1', but it only bothers me sometimes. Anyways, it's discouraging to me because despite my efforts, it seems that I'm invisible to guys in the room. I'm cordial, mildly flirtatious when the mood strikes, and always kind. I'm a good friend, have a great relationship with my family, I'm a Christian (although that's definitely not something I go beating people over the head with), and am generally a "great girl". All of my friends love me dearly, and everyone tells me that one day I will find the most perfect man ever. Well....after 22 years and no more than the occasional date that I usually had a hand in setting up, no one has ever pursued me. On a random note, I have noticed that a wall is automatically thrown up when I tell people I'm a medical student...like I'm being thrown into some category no one wants to be associated with for some reason. I don't say it in a way that makes me sound high and mighty, I just have to give an answer when people ask what I do. I feel like I have a lot to offer someone...loyalty, sensitivity, good morals, a silly sense of humor, fun, and support in everything he does. So, it's confusing....I don't know what my problem is. It's frustrating when there are numerous guys that I like, and when I even go so far as to ask them out myself, they don't get the message and if they do something with me, it's more to be nice. It's even more frustrating to see my girlfriends get spotted from across the room by guys and be approached by them without doing anything in particular to grab their attention. Any advice on how I can get guys to want to get to know me? Be interested in me? Pursue me even? Thanks in advance....sorry if this is long:confused:
Dumbledore Posted February 8, 2008 Posted February 8, 2008 On a random note, I have noticed that a wall is automatically thrown up when I tell people I'm a medical student...like I'm being thrown into some category no one wants to be associated with for some reason. Interesting. Some intimidation, maybe? Are you seen as somewhat of a challenge, with the stereotypical link to intelligence? I don't really think so. I'm thinking that perhaps you are a little "deeper" than the average girl your age, and the school of himbos swimming aimlessly about you simply can't appreciate you for the person you really are. I wouldn't be making any compensations for the crazy world we live in. Keep on enjoying life, and a metaphorical love truck will soon smash you in the face. I'm sure you will soon get some more constructive advice. You seem well-grounded, and able to express your feelings. What about turning the flirt dial up a bit, just to see what happens? Keep it below the "man eater" setting, but sometimes guys can be clueless.
EYECANDY000 Posted February 8, 2008 Posted February 8, 2008 Hey Moon, Welcome to LOveshack! For starters there is absolutely nothing wrong with being 22 and not being in a serious relationship yet. You cant put a time frame on when you find true love. When its your turn then it will come to you. But never force it. You will find yourself in a relationship that could have been avoided. Lastly, never base your experience comparing it to your friends. Everyone is different and thats the great thing about life, you get varities. The only advice I can give you about guys approaching you more is be confident and and classy. If guys are spotting your friends from across the room it could be for different reasons. Maybe they are interested in Red heads, brunettes, petitie women etc etc. Until then Enjoy life! A lot of people wish they could be 22 years old and do things different
suzy61 Posted February 9, 2008 Posted February 9, 2008 I know it's really hard, but try not to worry. Often the relationships that last the longest grow from friendships with people you know.Either a guy you're good friends with will want to be more than friends, or you'll meet someone through your friends. I don't think the medical student thing is something to worry about either, because at the end of the day, the guy that you end up with will want you for you, not for what you do in college.Or what you didn't do.Also, when a guy is really interested, he'll come after you...you won't have to go after him. I know that sounds really old-fashioned, but it's often true. Just really enjoy being 22, and when the time is right, everything will fall into place.
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