humanzee Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 my wife and i got married in highschool,and we have been married for 10 years.we have had our ups and downs,typical of any couple.2 years ago she began to use myspace ,and located an old freind from highschool(male).they began to call and text very frequently.he would make comments to her like?thats the rack i remember?.i finally caught on to her activity and confronted her about it.according to her they never had any physical contact other than the 1 time he met her at work for breakfast.the night i confronted her about this things reached a boiling point ,she explained to me that i was falling short of her expectations ,that i tended to be disrespectful in the way i spoke to her etc.and that she felt no love for me anymore.when asked about her freind she admitted to have feelings for him.she wanted to leave for some time to think ,but in the interest of our children we decided to work things out.she did apologize ,but contends that it was my shortcomings that caused her actions.2 years have now past and that incident has been put to rest ,but i have remained cautious since.at one point our sex life began to go stale,maybe once or twice a month .i began to seek ways to help stimulate our sex life ie. toys movies and literature.and each was met with disgust and rejection.she often states that wants more alone time,which is hard for me to swallow because most of home time is spent in an alternate room watching tv.when we do find time for intimacy it seem like aburden for her.i do know that sex is a physical need for all humanbeings,and yet she expresses her desire for it maybe once a year. i dont want to villafy my wife,she is the love of my life.i dont belive that she is evil or deceptive,and she has had to put up with my lack of inmaturity due to our young marriage.but at 28 years old i feel that there are physical needs that are not being met.i feel that i would be more motivated about our marriage if there was a bit more intimacy.i have a problem telling her this because i dont want her to act interested ,i want her to be interested.somtimes sex is so scarce that it stirs up the feeling that she being satisfied by someone else.i want that intimacy to return and dont know how,eveytime i speak to her about my problems she tells me that im exaggerating .i feel like im walking on eggshells.
whichwayisup Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 You two need some marriage counselling to get your marriage back on track. Learn to really listen and communicate with eachother, instead of tuning eachother out. Obviously each of you have needs that aren't being met, and her contacting some guy from her past has something to do with this as well. She is getting something out of keeping intouch with him, and it isn't good for your marriage. It's her escape, her fantasy which WILL interfer with her feelings (seems it has already) for you, hense the I need space thing... Talk to her, let her know you love her and will do everything possible to make life good again. You both loved eachother enough to get married, so hopefully with some help, those feelings can be reunited again.
Tomcat33 Posted February 6, 2008 Posted February 6, 2008 Sorry but I have to say this: why do grown married people insist on having myspace profiles? Myspace is for teenyboppers, kids, pornstars and bands. Honestly might as well take out a dating profile on a dating site and just cut to the chace, it's basically the same.
jenniferc1114 Posted February 6, 2008 Posted February 6, 2008 I'm very suspicious of myspace. Does she still have hers? Can you view it? Can you look at her history of blogs, comments etc? How about going to her photobucket acct and looking at her icons or past pictures she posted? I would suggest lookimg at all this info first. Do all this before asking her to share this or requesting her to stop. Trust me, once a person cancels their myspace acct, all info is gone. See what u can find first. You wouldn't believe what I've found.
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