AriaIncognito Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I was wondering what anyone felt about dating someone significantly older than you. Do you think it's a non-issue? Do you think it's a big deal because you could be in two totally different places in life? Do you think it's OK if you've got stuff in common? Another interesting twist to this situation is the fact that this person is close to one of my parents age (they had me young). Should that be a major red flag or deterrent? I've got my own ideas on this, but I'm wondering what everyone else thinks, or better yet, if you've been there done that, tell me your story. Was it worth it, did it work out, if it didn't work out, was it due to your ages?
Blue Eyed Brain Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I, personally, do not like to date outside a 10 year range. 5 years either way..... I'm not into the Mrs. Robinson or Mr. Sugar Daddy. It's not my preference. Besides, I have a very modern/inmature way about me...
boo121 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I was wondering what anyone felt about dating someone significantly older than you. Do you think it's a non-issue? Do you think it's a big deal because you could be in two totally different places in life? Do you think it's OK if you've got stuff in common? Another interesting twist to this situation is the fact that this person is close to one of my parents age (they had me young). Should that be a major red flag or deterrent? I've got my own ideas on this, but I'm wondering what everyone else thinks, or better yet, if you've been there done that, tell me your story. Was it worth it, did it work out, if it didn't work out, was it due to your ages? Nothing wrong with dating some1 older in my opinion. If you are both mature people, you will see past the fact that 1 of you is older than the other. I dated someone a few weeks ago who was a bit immature for my liking. She was 18 years younger than me. I am 21 and would say 18 / 19 is as low as should go! No idea how old you are though OP, but to my knowledge, older guys dating younger girls tend to work out better than the other way round. - Something you might want to consider.
Author AriaIncognito Posted February 5, 2008 Author Posted February 5, 2008 I, personally, do not like to date outside a 10 year range. 5 years either way..... I'm not into the Mrs. Robinson or Mr. Sugar Daddy. It's not my preference. Besides, I have a very modern/inmature way about me... I tend to be of the same thinking. I tend right now to stick with the same leading number lol. Usually I'm willing to consider 5-6 years older, and maybe a few years younger but I'd prefer older.
Author AriaIncognito Posted February 5, 2008 Author Posted February 5, 2008 Nothing wrong with dating some1 older in my opinion. If you are both mature people, you will see past the fact that 1 of you is older than the other. I dated someone a few weeks ago who was a bit immature for my liking. She was 18 years younger than me. I am 21 and would say 18 / 19 is as low as should go! No idea how old you are though OP, but to my knowledge, older guys dating younger girls tend to work out better than the other way round. - Something you might want to consider. I know of a very successful pairing of a guy who was 50 something and a girl who was 30 something, it just isn't what you normally see. And yes, he and I fit those two descriptions so I'd be the younger one ;-) I dont know, I had a nice time and see no reason to not accept another date should he ask, don't intend to say no, I'm just trying to figure out if i should expect it to just be dating for the sake of dating, or if it could ever evolve in time. I suppose like anyone, you just figure that out with getting to know one another since there are no sure bets in the world of dating. Gotta make sure your goals/values/wants are in line and all that. The odds of this between me and anyone, is slim. Heck the last guy I was with was born 1 day before me, and that didn't work, so maybe it's time to try the other end lol.
Lizzie60 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 Did both sides... My first ex was 11 years older.. he is now 66... then my second ex was 12 years younger. he's now 43... (I'm 55). I would rather date younger than older. But either way, if the age gap is too big.. it won't work in the long run...IMO When I see my first ex, I really can't see myself with this 'old man' ... I have to say that my 2nd ex looks older for his age though... For the last 10 years, I seem to attract much much younger men... like in their 20s.. one of my MMs is only 25..we've been seeing each other for 2 years now... During my last vacation, 2 weeks ago... I had a fling with a 20-something Dominican guy.. he has called 4 times since... Younger, IMO are way more fun.. but it won't last.. so I have to enjoy them while it lasts... But gawd.. they're fun! I will never feel my age as long as I will have a 20-something guy in my bed... I know some women prefer older men.. but when they both get older, the age difference is way too obvious... and the woman might feel like she's with her father... LOL.. To each our own!
boo121 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 If you 2 are a good match then things like how much older he is than you, whether he has a big nose, or whatever won't matter. Heck the last guy I was with was born 1 day before me, and that didn't work, so maybe it's time to try the other end lol. Exactly! If this one doesn't work, you'll have to settle for a granpa! its not looking good for you aria.
jerbear Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 For me, I keep it under my mom's age like my mom's age minus 10 is my range. I am not looking for a mom as I already have one and other "moms" because they now have kids who think I'm just a big kid! So that is my rational.
Author AriaIncognito Posted February 5, 2008 Author Posted February 5, 2008 Exactly! If this one doesn't work, you'll have to settle for a granpa! its not looking good for you aria. I'd hardly say that dating 2 different men of varying ages would mean i'd next need to settle for a grandpa, but thanks for your post just the same.
Author AriaIncognito Posted February 5, 2008 Author Posted February 5, 2008 For me, I keep it under my mom's age like my mom's age minus 10 is my range. Well, since you're a guy, it might differ a bit for you. My moms age minus 10 is 43. I'm 33. Typically, that range would be fine for me as well lol.
jerbear Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 Well, since you're a guy, it might differ a bit for you. My moms age minus 10 is 43. I'm 33. Typically, that range would be fine for me as well lol. Good age 33... by the way I like older women and pursued up to 42. The scary part is when your friends have kids who are in the same range as the ones you have pursued. Imagine your friend's kid who is your age range... i.e. 20-24 and they are your friend's kid! :eek: yes I did hit on my friend's kid and didn't know it, till she turned around.
boo121 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I'd hardly say that dating 2 different men of varying ages would mean i'd next need to settle for a grandpa, but thanks for your post just the same. my grandad is around 80, hes fit for his age... I'll put in a good word for you aria.
tanbark813 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I dated someone a few weeks ago who was a bit immature for my liking. She was 18 years younger than me. I am 21 ... You dated a 3 year old?
Balthazar Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 Hello Aria; just a few thoughts on you post. I believe that at the age of 33 you should have no problem dating almost anyone. I myself am 37 and am contemplating dating a (much) younger lady, who is 20. In our case, I feel it will be difficult, because at 20, I am certain that this young woman's personality is still developing;she will be quite a different woman in just a few years. Still, I plan on enjoying what time we have together. I personally prefer woman who are 5-15 years younger than I am, as woman at my age(37) usually look quite a bit older than the men do. I have many friends in their 40's who have wonderful relationships with women in their 30's, so I believe that dating a man 5-15 years older than you is not a problem, as long as you are sexually and mentally compatible. I believe that age becomes less of a factor as both man and woman mature. My own parents have an 18-year age difference(dad older) and have had a wonderful relationship, however my father does have an exceptional constitution . Concerning dating younger men, I cannot offer much advice, other than the example of a cousin of mine. She married a man who was 6 years her junior and quite handsome. I felt that it was a doomed relationship from the beginning, and unfortunately, they divorced about 2 years after the wedding. The reason was that he was getting a lot of attention from younger women and strayed.My 2 cents.
Saxis Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I myself am 37 and am contemplating dating a (much) younger lady, who is 20. In our case, I feel it will be difficult, because at 20, I am certain that this young woman's personality is still developing;she will be quite a different woman in just a few years. Still, I plan on enjoying what time we have together. Wow! That is quite a gap, but almost the same as your parents? I'm only 26 and have reservations about a 19 year old that wants to date. She's a relative of a friend's girlfriend, living with them while she goes to college. We don't really know each other, except introduced while at his house. She spoke through my friend over the phone after we had left, asking if I thought she was too young for me. I got her number anyway, but think I might like to get to know her a bit and size up her maturity level before any dating. With age gaps, I think it's best to slow things way down and really get a feel for where each person is in life. I don't have any experience with it yet, but that's my plan.
EYECANDY000 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I was wondering what anyone felt about dating someone significantly older than you. Do you think it's a non-issue? Do you think it's a big deal because you could be in two totally different places in life? Do you think it's OK if you've got stuff in common? Ive only dated someone who much about 12 years older than me, and it didnt last to long. I am in my late twenties. He was talking about how he wants to get married and have kids. And I just didnt see it that way. We had some things in common, but honestly it seemed like I was dating my dad. I like someone who is my age, or a couple of years older
underpants Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 It's funny you should post this thread. Honestly, if you like the guy then go on a few more dates with him and see where it goes. I don't think age has as much to do with relationship success as do the compatability and character of the the two involved.
Saxis Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I don't think age has as much to do with relationship success as do the compatability and character of the the two involved. True. I think we stereo-type people by their age, regarding compatibility and character.
StartingOver07 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 I dated someone a few weeks ago who was a bit immature for my liking. She was 18 years younger than me. I am 21 and would say 18 / 19 is as low as should go! She was 3? I have no problem dating older men (10+ years) but I have never been attracted to someone younger than I am. I think you should do what feels right for you.
halfarock Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 … I'm 33... My girlfriend is 33 and I’m 48. When we first met I thought that she was way too young for me and that we could never have much in common. As it’s turned out I can’t imagine anyone being anymore compatible. The age difference just doesn’t matter.
burning 4 revenge Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 You dated a 3 year old? and he has the nerve to complain that she was too immature
Lizzie60 Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 My girlfriend is 33 and I’m 48. When we first met I thought that she was way too young for me and that we could never have much in common. As it’s turned out I can’t imagine anyone being anymore compatible. The age difference just doesn’t matter. I know.. you're both still young... wait till you hit the 60 and she's 45... come and tell us if she's still with you... sorry to disappoint you but these relationships rarely last on a long term basis... especially when the oldest partner gets older.
Saxis Posted February 5, 2008 Posted February 5, 2008 and he has the nerve to complain that she was too immature Coloring books and playdough is a cheap date!
ladyintights Posted February 6, 2008 Posted February 6, 2008 I tend to be of the same thinking. I tend right now to stick with the same leading number lol. Usually I'm willing to consider 5-6 years older, and maybe a few years younger but I'd prefer older. sometimes rules are broken when emotions are involved. say you hit it off with someone you just met at a local hot spot, would you ask for his age and say "no thanks?" come on now. "sorry only id-verified dates with me bud"
halfarock Posted February 6, 2008 Posted February 6, 2008 I know.. you're both still young... wait till you hit the 60 and she's 45... come and tell us if she's still with you... sorry to disappoint you but these relationships rarely last on a long term basis... especially when the oldest partner gets older. I don’t know about that. The only couple that I know that has a wider age difference seems to be bonded for life. She tells me that they met and got married while she was in college. She is about 60 now and he is at least 80.
Recommended Posts