She must think I'm a psycho

[Nowhere2Turn]

Hey everyone,

So I totally regret doing this, but I contacted this girl I found on some dating site who I dated about five years back, completely oblivious to the fact she might actually *not* want to hear from me and would be freaked out by it.

 

It's just that when I went on, it was purely chance that I found her profile, and I recongnized her instantly despite it being so long.

 

Also, a while ago, same thing happened with a girl I hadn't seen in over ten years. It was a girl I dated like, one time I think.. So I contacted her too, just sayin 'hey is this so and so? you know who this is?.. etc etc' and with this girl, she responded back totally happy to hear from me. We ended up hangin out for few months, but it just so happened we (or I) came to find out I just liked her as a friend now anyways. But it was all good. No weirdness at all.

 

So when I found this girl, my first instinct was cool! You know, to me I was just not expecting any weirdness at all. Just like with the first girl. It just didn't occur to me.

 

Then when I went to check my messages, I saw that she completely deleted her profile!! So that totally blew, I just felt so completely unhuman. (Because in my mind, I REALLY was simply--pleasantly suprised to find her, and thought we had a good enough relationship to where this would be a casual reunion of sorts). I was totally not expecting this. Then to top it off, I tried logging on later and now MY profile was deleted!! So I knew right away--she had reported me to the admins.

 

I feel like it was a huge misunderstanding but there's no way I can explain. Now she must think I'm a psycho stalker, and what kills me is that when I rethink what I wrote, it could be interpreted as kinda stalker-ish, cause I was being all ambigous, like 'do you know who this is?' and giving cryptic hints at who I am. So probably wasn't the best message, but to report me?? I thought that was just a little too much. I liked that site and was getting to meet other people and using it in a totally normal proper way, and now I'm just scared to sign back up cause those admins are really sensitive like that.

 

Now I just feel horrible. I feel like a horrible person. I feel like I really did stalk her. I mean, in her mind I did. So now I feel like I did too. I feel guilty of it. I feel like I'm now one of those guys I only read about before.. now I'm one of them.

 

I'm NEVER contacting anyone again!!!!!!!

 

Do you guys think what I did was really in that category of loser stalker though?

Edited February 2, 2008 by Nowhere2Turn

[EYECANDY000]

If someone has a profile on an site where they have tons of friends who they communicate with, I doubt she deleted her profile because you sent her a message. All she has to do is not respond to your messages. The moderators probaly deleted your profile for other reasons. They wont just delete you for sending someone a harmless message

[jaslene2009]

There are thousands of sites out there. I wouldn't worry about it. If I don't want to speak to someone, I don't answer it at all. So just move on, find new friends. I am pulling for ya!

Hey everyone,

So

I totally regret doing this, but I contacted this girl I found on some dating site who I dated about five years back, completely oblivious to the fact she might actually *not* want to hear from me and would be freaked out by it.

 

It's just that when I went on, it was purely chance that I found her profile, and I recongnized her instantly despite it being

so

long.

 

Also, a while ago, same thing happened with a girl I hadn't seen in over ten years. It was a girl I dated like, one time I think..

So

I contacted her too, just sayin 'hey is this

so

and

so

? you know who this is?.. etc etc' and with this girl, she responded back totally happy to hear from me. We ended up hangin out for few months, but it just

so

happened we (or I) came to find out I just liked her as a friend now anyways. But it was all good. No weirdness at all.

 

So

when I found this girl, my first instinct was cool! You know, to me I was just not expecting any weirdness at all. Just like with the first girl. It just didn't occur to me.

 

Then when I went to check my messages, I saw that she completely deleted her profile!!

So

that totally blew, I just felt

so

completely unhuman. (Because in my mind, I REALLY was simply--pleasantly suprised to find her, and thought we had a good enough relationship to where this would be a casual reunion of sorts). I was totally not expecting this. Then to top it off, I tried logging on later and now MY profile was deleted!!

So

I knew right away--she had reported me to the admins.

 

I feel like it was a huge misunderstanding but there's no way I can explain. Now she must think I'

m

a psycho stalker, and what kills me is that when I rethink what I wrote, it could be interpreted as kinda stalker-ish, cause I was being all ambigous, like 'do you know who this is?' and giving cryptic hints at who I am.

So

probably wasn't the best message, but to report me?? I thought that was just a little too much. I liked that site and was getting to meet other people and using it in a totally normal proper way, and now I'

m

just scared to sign back up cause those admins are really sensitive like that.

 

Now I just feel horrible. I feel like a horrible person. I feel like I really did stalk her. I mean, in her mind I did.

So

now I feel like I did too. I feel guilty of it. I feel like I'

m

now one of those guys I only read about before.. now I'

m

one of them.

 

I'

m

NEVER contacting anyone again!!!!!!!

 

Do you guys think what I did was really in that category of loser stalker though?

 

[Nowhere2Turn]

Thanks guys. What sucks is, I was 99.9% sure she would of been happy to hear from me. I had that "gut" feeling she would've been thrilled. When we dated, it wasn't perfect, but there was something there. I saw she attempted to call me a few years later, but I missed the call. I didn't call back then cause I was still going thru issues. On her profile, her description was so much how I am today too, it seemed so perfect. That's why I tried to contact her.

 

But now, I don't know, and never will. I have no clue whether she read it and thought ewww stalker!! Or if she never read it and doesn't know I tried contacting her.

[LikesMeNot]

When she called you and u missed it, u probably hurt her feelings. She remembered u until that point. She gave up on you and forgot u, since there was no reason. not answering was kinda foolish, and could have been avoided.

It also depends on the type of girl. If she overreacted, she's not a very forgiving one, eah? I would give you 3 thumbs down if i could, cause you're acting like a wuss. FIND ANOTHER PERSON!!!!! It's just not worth it!