samir Posted January 30, 2008 Posted January 30, 2008 First of all Id like to say a hello to all, Im new here, just come across this forum on google search:) I met up with a girl few weeks back, and I think it went well. First date we just went for a coffee and chatted. The following week I invited her to mine for lunch, I could see the attraction and she was giving the signals, she was very touchy and started to hold my hands and rest her head on my chest as we were sitting on the couch... though she was shy or was not ready to kiss... I did not push any further on this point. Bit of background info. She is 21 and Im 30. I sense she is a little inexperienced and has not been in a proper relationship before. We have spoken twice on the phone since last saturday and generally things seem cool. My question is how should I play this? how regularly should I contact her and should I tell her that I like her? Even though its obvious ...dont want to frighten her off by coming on strong so soon.... also with valentines coming up should I do something or just ignore that whole event and continue to get to know her in a normal way and just let it take time to develop? My question is how should I approach this Many thanks.. Sam
Ronni_W Posted January 31, 2008 Posted January 31, 2008 Hey Sam. It may sound too simple or too obvious but... I wouldn't try to "play" it at all. Communicate with her by asking similar types of questions you've posed here -- who better to tell you what she wants and needs, than the lady herself??? Just say, "I like you and I want to get to know you better and, because of that, I'm happy for the two of us to figure out together what is going to work best. I don't want to seem forward but I don't want to seem over-bearing or needy, either. So tell me...what do you want about calls and Valentine's Day and stuff like that." (Well, don't say them all in one sentence! ) Let her be a person, and make her decisions and express her needs and desires. And when those conflict with yours, you both get to be 'persons' and reach healthy and mutually agreeable compromises. Wishing you a long and happy relationship.
Author samir Posted January 31, 2008 Author Posted January 31, 2008 Thanks for your tips Ronnie:) I guess your right about talking to her. I will do just that. I know sometimes if you give a woman too much attention it can put them off you. So in the beginning how often do you think I should talk to her? Lol I sound like a newbie to relationships, but I have never dealt with someone so much younger than me. My previous relationships with with women my age and its a different situation and they are more forward and know what they want.
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