Lauriebell82 Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 This is a question I've been wondering about. The reason that I began wondering about it was my best friend just told me about going to Texas to visit her husband. He is in the Air Force now and just graduated from basic training. Before he joined the AF he was a loser...failed out of community college, bad with money, smoke a lot, drank a lot, very irresponsible. He pretty much had nothing going for him at all..except he was a nice guy. Anyway, so today she was telling me about her trip to Texas and she said he has like totally changed. He lost all this weight, and he had to quit drinking and smoking. He had a curfew too, and my friend said that he was real paranoid when it got close to him having to go back to the base and she said he made a big deal about it! She actually sounded pissed that he was acting responsible and stuff! When actually in reality I think he joined the Air Force so he could support her and make something of himself. Anyway, I just wanted to see if anyone else had any thoughts on the subject. What are some of your experiences? Are women really attracted to men who are bad for them?
sb129 Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 Define "loser". The one you described was actually a nice guy as you said, and wasn't bad for anyone. A "loser" isn't always the same as a "man who is bad for you." My ex was quite successful careerwise, and alot more "responsible" by your definition than my fiance is. My fiance is a million times the man my ex is. He is a wonderful man who is much better for me than my ex will ever be.
Author Lauriebell82 Posted January 25, 2008 Author Posted January 25, 2008 Define "loser". The one you described was actually a nice guy as you said, and wasn't bad for anyone. A "loser" isn't always the same as a "man who is bad for you." My ex was quite successful careerwise, and alot more "responsible" by your definition than my fiance is. My fiance is a million times the man my ex is. He is a wonderful man who is much better for me than my ex will ever be. Hmm, I guess I never thought of it in the sense that "loser" means different things. Interesting... What are people's opinions on what constitutes someone who is bad for them?
Green Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 The guy you described didnt sound like a loser at all
Author Lauriebell82 Posted January 26, 2008 Author Posted January 26, 2008 Loser was maybe wrong terminology. I suppose irresponsibility was a better phrase. It's just surprising because she complained about how irresponsible she was, and now she doesnt like it that he is a responsible adult. i just think that is kind of ironic and I am perplexed by it. So I was just curious to get opinions.
allina Posted January 26, 2008 Posted January 26, 2008 No, from what I see most women are not attracted to losers or men that aren't good for them. I would never date a loser, eww. I think that most women who date losers (by loser I mean uneducated, no job, doesn't treat her well) aren't all that together themselves.
Author Lauriebell82 Posted January 26, 2008 Author Posted January 26, 2008 No, from what I see most women are not attracted to losers or men that aren't good for them. I would never date a loser, eww. I think that most women who date losers (by loser I mean uneducated, no job, doesn't treat her well) aren't all that together themselves. Yeah. The thing is though, my friend is really together. She can be a little irresponsible, but for the most part she is much more responsible then he is. She has low self esteem low so I think she thinks she can't do better or something. So I think it may be weird for her that suddenly she has this military husband who is a responsible adult.
allina Posted January 26, 2008 Posted January 26, 2008 Yeah. The thing is though, my friend is really together. She can be a little irresponsible, but for the most part she is much more responsible then he is. She has low self esteem low so I think she thinks she can't do better or something. So I think it may be weird for her that suddenly she has this military husband who is a responsible adult. I think it's ofter related to low self esteem, maybe she's afraid that now he might want someone "better"
Author Lauriebell82 Posted January 26, 2008 Author Posted January 26, 2008 I think it's ofter related to low self esteem, maybe she's afraid that now he might want someone "better" Hmm, yeah I never thought of that. She does have low self-esteem, I know that. It's funny because I used to be a lot like her and go out with uneducated, lying, jerky guys as well. It's just a little surprising because she was so upset that her husband said he had to get back to the base because he had a curfew. I told her that he is probably scared of getting screamed at by one of the leaders lol.
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