galaxy1282 Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 I'm 25 years old and about 4 months ago I broke up with my fiance. I absolutely hate being single. All of my friends are either married or engaged and I am so jealous of them. One of my friends just told me that her and her fiance are finalists in a contest to have their entire wedding paid for. I wanted to be happy for her but I was just so sad that it was not myself that was preparing to walk down the aisle. I don't want to be jealous of my friends and I honestly do wish them the best, its just hard to hear about all of their wedding planning, especially since I am no longer planning my own wedding. I know that I need to just be patient until I meet someone else, and 50% of marriages end in divorce so I shouldn't be in a rush to get married, but that does very little to console me right now. It's so hard to hear all of their happiness while I prepare to spend Valentine's Day with my dog. Any advice?
spookie Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 Yah, don't spend Valentine's with your dog. Start going out now and meeting new people that have more in common with you in where they are in life, and when V-Day rolls around make some fun anti-V-day plans with your new friends. Of course it's going to be painful to hear about other people's wedding plans right after you've broken up with someone you were going to marry. The trick is not to let this dominate.
KittenMoon Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 It's been 2 years since my long-term ex and I broke up. I have yet to meet anyone else even for a date. In the mean time, all my friends are getting married, etc etc. It's miserable. BUT it's been two years and I'm still kickin'. When you're close enough to someone that marriage is in the talkings, it's very hard to move forward. Romantically anyways. You can take this time now to do other stuff- social or education or recreational stuff that YOU want to do. I may not have met any new suitors, but I've made a ton of new friends, and done a whole load of new stuff. As for V-Day... screw it. Or remember how many people will be disappointed when their SO half-@$$es it or something. Go out and do something weird and fun and NOT romantic- just for the heck of it.
Kittiecat Posted January 31, 2008 Posted January 31, 2008 I have nagging feelings of jealousy towards my friends, too. They're all married, with nice houses, cute little babies, shiny cars, and wonderful husbands. Then I remember that what I see is, to some extent, a carefully crafted image that they project to make themselves feel better. After all, who wants to talk about the negative aspects of children and married life? I'm sure they have their share of marital squabbles, pukey babies, exhaustion and lack of sex. Does it make me feel better knowing this? Yes, a little. It gives me a more realistic view of life's milestones, so I don't always feel like I'm missing out on something spectacular.
vanilla_11 Posted January 31, 2008 Posted January 31, 2008 Hello! I'm new the this fourm, but I have some words of advice. First off, trust me, I know the feeling. I keep seeing all these people I went to high school with getting married, starting families and just loving life & boy, did I think, I am way behind. But then I keep thinking (the same thing you mentioned) divorce... how many of them will end up that way? I know for me, I want to find the right person before I settle down and get married... Well, some advice... do you have other friends that aren't married? That may help you out. There are many people I know that love being single! They enjoy their time alone, date occassionally, but enjoy getting to know others (on a platonic, maybe relationship basis), learning more about themselves and surrounding themselves with family. For Valentine's Day... I personally believe it's a dumb holiday, but don't look at it as a love romantically, but as love in general. Spend it with family, friends (single friends)... or just forget about it... it's just another day... commercialized to make money for companies.
Meaplus3 Posted January 31, 2008 Posted January 31, 2008 I'm 25 years old and about 4 months ago I broke up with my fiance. I absolutely hate being single. All of my friends are either married or engaged and I am so jealous of them. One of my friends just told me that her and her fiance are finalists in a contest to have their entire wedding paid for. I wanted to be happy for her but I was just so sad that it was not myself that was preparing to walk down the aisle. I don't want to be jealous of my friends and I honestly do wish them the best, its just hard to hear about all of their wedding planning, especially since I am no longer planning my own wedding. I know that I need to just be patient until I meet someone else, and 50% of marriages end in divorce so I shouldn't be in a rush to get married, but that does very little to console me right now. It's so hard to hear all of their happiness while I prepare to spend Valentine's Day with my dog. Any advice? Oh... I would not worry if I were you I spent lot's of Valentine's day's hugging on to my cat! Do... be patient''' and wait it out here..It will get better. Try to distract yourself on that day.. perhap's with a hobby.. think of it as just a normal day if you can. Hug's.. AP:)
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