pandagirl Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 So, maybe I'm just feeling a little down from having the flu for the past few days, but I'm getting more and more bummed about my single status. I'm 29 and haven't had a real boyfriend since college. All my friends (including their boyfriends) tell me how cute and attractive I am, and when I ask them why no guy ever asks me out on a date, they say it's because I have a sign on my forehead that says: "I AM NOT AVAILABLE." True, I am quite guarded and apprehensive when it comes to men. Is it possible that guys can tell just by looking at me that I'm not interested? And what makes a girl approachable?
tanbark813 Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 And what makes a girl approachable? A girl who smiles, makes eye contact, and seems friendly in general.
alphamale Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 And what makes a girl approachable? a woman who looks like she's having fun and smiling and has positive body language....
EYECANDY000 Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 Is it possible that guys can tell just by looking at me that I'm not interested? And what makes a girl approachable? Facial expressions can say a thousand words! Its not hard to be approachable , if you seem friendly , joking, laughing. No one wants to engage in conversation with someone who is stuck on the wall with their arms folded, and has a mean mug! growwwl
norajane Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 they say it's because I have a sign on my forehead that says: "I AM NOT AVAILABLE." Ask your friends what you are doing that gives off that signal, and what you could do to change that.
Author pandagirl Posted January 23, 2008 Author Posted January 23, 2008 I think the thing is... I am friendly. People say I'm funny, nice, charming, but my friends say I don't ever give off a *flirty* vibe, that I'm purely putting out a friendly vibe.
compassion42 Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 I agree with the above posts...smile, have fun,be happy and men will pick up on that. I have found that when I stop looking-I usually end up meeting someone new. It's all about the vibes we put out.
Trialbyfire Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 Friendly is okay. As long as it's an approachable vibe, if you're attractive, most guys will at minimum, start up a convo.
Author pandagirl Posted January 23, 2008 Author Posted January 23, 2008 wah. maybe i'm just not attractive and my friends are lying to me! haha. i will put out a better effort the next time i go out.
spookie Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 Try online dating. I used to think negatively about it but now I realize it's the only logical place for people who *aren't* bubbly/ full of fun to meet others like them. Personally, I prefer guys who aren't friendly/approachable; and I know I'm not either unless I'm on drugs. But, it's so hard for two quiet, introspective people, especially if they are at all shy, to meet, speak to each other, and hit it off, without knowing a little about each other first (which online dating helps with). I don't think you should change your "vibe" to attract men; you'd likely attract the wrong ones that way anyway. Instead, seek out a different outlet.
Green Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 Well Im the HMA and if you dont mind one of the few luckiest women on earth you can join my harem. Tell people your spoken for frm now on KMT!
monkey00 Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 I think responsiveness works. An example would be a guy striking up a random conversation with based on what you're doing or wearing..if you give a vibe that you don't want to be bothered then likely it won't go the way you want. In any case I think it works both ways for both sexes. Be responsive, make EC, smile, say "hi".
Author pandagirl Posted January 23, 2008 Author Posted January 23, 2008 Maybe this all comes down to the fact that I am a HORRIBLE flirter! I'm more Sarah Silverman than Marilyn Monroe. I'm more likely to pull out a fart joke than coyly bat my lashes!
HoustonScrewed Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 I would stay away from the online stuff, I have never had anything good out of that. Flirting means a lot about getting dates. I have a problem right now with someone that I can't seem to ask out, and she has flirted with me. I just shake in my boots too much.
tanbark813 Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 Maybe this all comes down to the fact that I am a HORRIBLE flirter! I'm more Sarah Silverman than Marilyn Monroe. I'm more likely to pull out a fart joke than coyly bat my lashes! I don't think that really matters if the guy in question has a similar sense of humor as you do.
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