FooledOnce Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 I got an email from my ex at work today (stopped me in mid-conversation when i saw it). She said she would like to get together for lunch or at night. She says she understands if i don't want to but she was just missing me and thinking of all the things she wanted to tell me and keep me updated on. Now, about a month ago we got together, she said she missed me, we kissed, cuddled, etc. but then she went out and put up pics of her and her new bf kissing and stuff on facebook (ouch). So i'm pretty certain that she doesn't want to get back together. So why does she really want to see me? I'm thinking she just wants to make sure 'her foot is still in the door' (as someone else said in another thread). So why say that she misses me? Is she just trying to mess with me to see how i'll react?
oppath Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 She surely does miss you. When you end a relationship, there are many qualities about someone that you still love. She misses you. She is genuine in that regard. However, it's also selfish and manipulative behavior on her part to throw the "I miss you card" unless she wants to get back together. Would she want a guy who dumped her to pull that card on her? Of course not. Why not ask her straight up: "what are your intentions in asking me to meet? I'm really not ready to be platonic friends. I'll let you know if and when I am in that place."
PerfectXPretty Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 Yeah sounds skeptical, i wish ya luck! i'm sure you'll make the right decision!
MakeLemonade Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 I would agree that she probably does genuinely miss you - however - I also think it is probably an ego/esteem thing, she is feeling insecure in her new relationship/dating and is looking back to the familiar to build herself up.
jdeedee Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 Just agreeing with the sentiments of the other posters. If she is still in a relationship with this other guy I would give the advice to politely decline meeting up, especially if you are still hung up on her. She has good intentions I'm sure, she is probably missing you and having trouble want's a esteem build up and doesn't realise how hurtful it will be to you to see her. Confusing too.
Author FooledOnce Posted January 22, 2008 Author Posted January 22, 2008 Yeah, that's just the thing. I like seeing her; we still get along and have a good time, but then I think about her a ton and get sad all over again. Also, every time it's been about 3 weeks since i've seen/heard from her, I get to feeling awful all over again. That always lasts a couple of days, then she contacts me again. Must be the same for her. I think what i have to do to break the cycle is not see her anymore at all :-( It's really hard cuz she's my best friend ever and the first thing i think about when my feet hit the floor every morning.
sedgwick Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 If that's you in your icon, you're sexy and she's clueless.
Author FooledOnce Posted January 23, 2008 Author Posted January 23, 2008 Haha, thanks Sedge, it's not me but i'm still sexy and she's still clueless ;-P I haven't written her back yet. I'll probably write her today and tell her I can't meet up this week because of work (truth). That'll put the ball in her court if she wants to make arrangements to see me. Just by contacting me she's making me think of her again. I just had a dream that we were back together again and we were hooking up. Hot, passionate hooking-up. I'm off to a cold shower.
Always Wrong Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 Don't let her use you for an ego boost! That's why she wants to see you. And she is probably trying to keep her options open if her current bf bails.
PinkRibbon Posted January 23, 2008 Posted January 23, 2008 Sounds like she is playing with you. Trying to keep her options open without slamming the door shut. You have to decide what you want and proceed from there. But letting someone play with your emotions and heart in not a good trait in a person. If she is doing it now what is stopping her from doing it again in the future...only you can stop it.
Recommended Posts