messiah Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 hey all this is my first post so i would greatly appreciate any comments or advice on my situation.... My gf and I recently broke up in the last couple of weeks we were together for about 2 and a bit years. I dunno why but she claims that her feelings for me have gradually faded away..( is that possible by the way?) a couple of days later i couldnt bear it. so we had a talk and we agreed to just not see and contact each other for a while so we can both re think how we feel about each other. About a week later on a saturday night i was invited to a friends party. She was gona be there too because this friend was mutual so i didnt really wana go because we werent supposed to see each other. But i ended up going anyway. On the night of the party while we were dancing (my gf/ex that is) she kissed me, on more then one occasion also. They werent just friendly kisses on the cheek. they were full on kisses on the lips, the kind that you will give your loved one. The next day i asked her why she did it. and of course she claims to be drunk, not remembering, and even denies that it happend. Now she seems to be angry at me! when i didnt do anything. I didnt put any moves on her that night she kissed me on her own accord. She knew that i was in a confused state before the party and she goes and does something like that to send me more into a spiral. So what happens now? do i continue to give her space? i really dont kno what to think about all this anymore....
oppath Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 Yes, continue to give her space. Don't allow her to mess with your emotions. I'm sure it's not with intent on her part, but you are the common denominator if you continue to allow it to happen. I'd give yourself a 2-3 month ban from mutual friend activities where she might be. Just make alternate plans. It really is not that big of a deal and is not that difficult to pull off. Take charge of your social life. You call up your friends and make the plans.
Trialbyfire Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 Yes, continue to give her space. Don't allow her to mess with your emotions. I'm sure it's not with intent on her part, but you are the common denominator if you continue to allow it to happen. I'd give yourself a 2-3 month ban from mutual friend activities where she might be. Just make alternate plans. It really is not that big of a deal and is not that difficult to pull off. Take charge of your social life. You call up your friends and make the plans. I couldn't agree with you more oppath. If someone is confused, space is the ideal solution.
Author messiah Posted January 22, 2008 Author Posted January 22, 2008 (edited) yea i forgot to mention that she has kind of sifted into my close group of mates so shell always be there shell always get the invite to activities. These are my actual close friends the ones you hang out with anytime you want you kno, and she has sorted sifted into that altho i wouldnt say shes close with any of them. She just hangs out with them. So im trying to not see her but whenever i ask my mates what they are doing or what they got planned, shell be there. And i know that i cant tell my mates who they can or cant hang with nor can i do the same for her. Its just hard because it feels like i have to do all this by myself. Edited January 22, 2008 by messiah
oppath Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 Actually, you can totally tell your mates "It's going to be difficult for me to be around her for a couple months. It's not that I hate her, it will just require some time to adjust." Don't be scared to tell them that.
Author messiah Posted January 24, 2008 Author Posted January 24, 2008 hmm its not really working, i have told my friends that i cant be around her right now. But she always gets the invite anyway. like we usually meet up to play soccer often and she always gets invited i love to play soccer its the only thing that helps me get through this. But i was thinking, does it really count as seeing her if i dont acknowledge her or talk to her while shes there?
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