Lucky555 Posted January 21, 2008 Posted January 21, 2008 Still trying to grasp what when wrong with the guy i was seeing I feel crushed still since i tried to give him another shot but the same thing happened again. He does not want a commitment. I feel as though something is wrong with me. But i know its because he does not have his own place but could afford one if he wanted to. He is saving his money. I am living with my parents because i commute to school and i want to save money too. I just cant stop replaying things. He is currently upset with me because i have been going out with other guys and just having a good time. Right now i have been trying to block this out but i can't. I am so sad because i thought things would be great again. He never came out and said he wanted to be with me exclusively. i wish i had never been wrapped up in this. He does not make me happy. In the begging he led me to believe he wanted to be with me and he did impress me. He was everything i had been waiting for.....UNTIL I found out his ex was contacting him almost everyday trying to get him back. He didn't but that led me to believe he was not over her. I left because he was dedicating his time to her more than me! When i am with him i feel good i feel happy but i still doubt him because he does not communicate his feelings. when i am away from him i feel like hes not interested in me since he doesn't make any effort to see me or talk to me. BUT he gets upset when i move on. It hurts me to know that i hurt him but i cant keep hurting myself. I told myself not to be his friend do NC. And there i go I contact him only to be left without an answer. If he moved on i would be jealous but i know it was because of someone else. But why do i feel like its me to blame? Because i have needs that need to be met. I need to feel like he wants me and that he would do anything to be with me. He only lives 45 min from me and never once has he wanted to hang out. I feel like i need to get this out to get over it. Its only the matter that i feel like he has hurt me again the same way he did before. I have studies to focus on i don't need him to hurt me ever again. Hes my brothers good friend too which makes it hard not to see him again. I just feel like he lied to me of what kind of person he was and what he wanted. I feel like saying "you can't blame me for wanting someone who wants to be with me. Why are you so angry at me because i am trying to move on. I am not a cheater and we were never anything since you never wanted to have something. How do you expect me to stay by you when you give me nothing to go on. You only add sorrow to my life and why i invested my time i don't know. You had your opportunity and you throw it away once again." I know i have to be single for awhile now to heal. Its hard because getting over him a second time is harder than the first. For me i have been cutting him out since the beinning of this month. I just feel like i had given him so many opportunities and i just wanted to be on common ground and be honest with me. I just wanted him to be real with me for once. I have talked to my friends and they say leave him ect. and i have but those feelings that are left need time to dissipate. He claims he is busy with work ok yeah i am busy with school. But no time to say how are you? no time to see eachother ever? What kind of relationship did he plan on having? I know hes been hurt and so have i before but it seems like he may be not ready for anything. Maybe he just didnt want to be alone. I have been with a guy that he just didn't want to be alone even though we had nothing in common. It was why we are not together. No questions here but if u have something similar or strategies for coping let me know
carrotgirl Posted January 22, 2008 Posted January 22, 2008 {{Lucky}}} No advice other than to just keep doing what you've been doing. You sound a lot more together than I was after I got dumped. Brava! Carrot
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