what can i do from here?

[indohouze]

I suppose this might be a dumb sorta question but i cant think things out at the moment because ive just obtained a massive pay increase from a new fulltime job(coming from a dominos driver to a desktop support team leader).

 

Anyways ive been going out with my girl since early november, i kinda met her on the internet by accident(my friend randomly started adding chicks to myspace when he was over one day) and since then have formed a relationship.

 

But im stuck on where to go with the relationship because we really do both like each other but here is a few hates i have and wanna try 'clear' so we can become closer

 

She says theirs certain rules and one was that i can't like pretty much compliment her on how she looks(very hard to do )

 

I cant say i love her(although i think when the time is right that will go)

 

Can't touch her in certain spots but she does to me

 

I see her twice a week basically because she works fulltime and so do i now. Like i might see her 3 times but its something like mon or tues after work then i spend saturday night with her.

 

I just want some advice on what i should do to show her i care more and become more involved with her sorta thing. I had her really all over me in 'love' on saturday night because she was sick/sore and i was with her making her feel happy but yer.

 

It may sound sorta wierd as a relationship but it really isn't its just i think she finds it hard to open up to people because of circumstances that have happened in her life.

 

Anyways all comments much appreciated

[indohouze]

Now she's considering to break up with me over the biggest load of ****. ANytime i do anything slightly annoying to her she goes all defensive and then threatn's to break up if thats what i really want. Ne ways she said that she reakons i feel embarrased to be with her and not only that, that i only take her out when its me and her. I can't figure out whys she's like this i mean i cant see how she would be intrested in doing other things i do like going out with my mates to clubs because all their looking for is a good time and easy going girls. I would be more than happy to take her to other thing i do but i felt as if she wouldn't wanna do it ya no? God its confuzin, i try my best to see her as much as possible as well as my best to make her happy yet i just can't do it.

[compassion42]

Have you tried talking to her about how her behavior is confusing? She seems like she is pretty immature and maybe just not ready for a relationship. I don't know, to me it sounds like this girl is not the one for you-it might be time to move on.

[indohouze]

mmm its really hard. I mean my only form of contact with her now is on msn because she wont answer my phone calls and its hard to get ur point across when its not real time because she has time to think about what to do for a response to suit her. I really can't see myself moving on without big problems for myself for a while because ive fell for her pretty hard. Im one of those ppl that do and can only see logic in a breakup if its something significant that both ppl can agree on in a way. Its just the way her friends talk to me about how she acts when im not their, like they say how much she talks about you like shes crazy in love with me but she just doesnt have the confidence or w/e it is to say she loves me.

 

Another thing that i think has come into her thought processes is the backgrounds of who we are n such. Like where she lives its a avg-bad sorta area and she doesn't have alot of close friends her age because she moved around alot during her highschool years and now her parents are moving interstate and basically telling her to find your own home your old enough. The other week i was out with her friends and they gave me a lift home and when they saw where i lived i think she felt really embarrased and im not trying to make myself look big just i live in a well off area in a new estate. Not only that she was dead embarrassed for me to meet her family at lunch one day and she cut every family member off when they came up with conversation that she didnt like.

 

She hasnt met my family yet but im wanting her to meet them at my mums 50th next month. So yer thats my situation atm and im sorry if its a bit confusing but everytime i come to write posts on this forum its under relationship stress

[PeteJM]

If you can only contact her on MSN then just pour your feelings out there. It would be more powerful if it was a phone call or in person, but whatever. Tell her about how you're really confused and that if she has some problems you're there for her. She seems insecure to me. If putting your feelings out there doesn't work, then you just need to move on.

[indohouze]

hmmmm, she started to listen to what i was saying after she started conversation with me then after i wrote like something really heart felt about my feelings for her she didn't reply then after 10 minutes i asked are u still their and she said im thinking. SO yer . Another thing ive noticed that if i was to point this out 2 someone and you think im crazy well ok but she seems to get into this mood 5 days less or more of the 23rd of a month, so im thinking maybe this is her time of the month or something but then i also think i don't no any chicks that act like this. Is it normal for that 2 happen lol

[indohouze]

we ended up breaking up monday last week and i sent a really long email to her about how i felt and then she sent 1 back and this went back and forth and it ended with she was confused and didnt wanna speak 2 me again. situation is she catches the same train i do 2 work in the morning and i can if i want catch her train home and its like a hour and half with her travel time.

 

ne ways the next mronign i didnt write her any msgs and she wrote 1 saying how much she missed me then i wrote something back and throughout the week it was just msgs about how she says she misses me then a few hours later followed by w/e i dont wanna speak 2 u again bye and mind you the circumstances didnt change and i didnt send her anything nasty she just does that and i have no idea why. So ne ways she apparently was meant 2 have deleted everything outta her phone and msn n stuff about me and thats when i get a msg sayign i was looking through my sent msgs and found ur number and decided to send u a msg.

 

Saturday arvo rolls around, i sms'd her and asked her 2 go out 2 town because the week previous 1 of her excuses as 2 why she broke up was that i never take her out with my friends when i go clubbing and it was my best judgement not 2 do that because of what my mates do when were out clubbing and i felt as if she'd b bored and feel out of place. I decided to send her a msg asking her 2 come out 2 town tonight and come 2 a local club i start off with b4 i go out 2 town 2 meet up.

 

She sends me a msg back saying, well you don't ask your ex gf to go out clubbing with you unless you 2 were friends which we are not so i don;'t know why you bothered. I then sent a msg back saying, look i believe its because im a nice guy and thats why i asked im sorry.

 

l8r in the evening about 9-9:30 i get a msg from her saying, having fun? i sent 1 back saying no not really ive got a headache. I didn't receive any msgs after that and of course i was enjoying myself out in a club then about 12:15 i get a msg saying ' this is the first time ive been over my friends house that ive known you and im not with you'

 

I decided nope im not sending a msg back because she can wait and think. Next morning after i had a spew i send a msg saying 'what does that mean' she wrote a msg back saying check your email.

 

DEAR STEVEN,

 

Hey this email is ---------not a very good idea--------- but u always so that I should tell u how---------- I feel so here it goes. Last night is --------------the only time I have been to rems and not been with u, it make me feel ---------sad and confused but I do not know what I want anymore so am so confused ATM but I do no that not being with u last night make me ----------cry which kinda sux as I never cry this is how first time that I have cried --------------since we have broken up I have felt down but I haven't cried. I have been thinking so much this past week and I have come to the conclusion that I--------------- am in love with u. I don't want to say it and u don't----------- wanna hear it but u r all I can think about and it hard not being with u. With u getting on my train it makes it harder for me to forget u but u keep doing it and I didn't like the fact that u had to talk to reme about us. I have all these different feelings running through my head ATM and I --------don't understand what I should do. Its so hard not being with u anymore and I know I was the one that ended it so I have to deal with it but I didn't ----------till now how I felt. I hate the L word and I hate------- these feelings I had feeling -----------depressed and sad all the time and I hate missing u so much I just want all this stuff too go away.

 

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*i put lines through it so if she google searched hopefully it wont show up lol

 

So i wrote a msg back saying look if this is all true i why dont we get back together, im willing to put 100% effort in making this work, take your time i dont expect u 2 answers in 2 minutes flat(that was something like what i wrote)

 

so ne ways tonight i was on msn and she strats typing 2 me saying so whose the new girl your into huh, i added a picture of a friend last night 2 my myspace which was a pic of me n her but shes totally a friend i dont like her pesonatlity so i could never date her plus she has a another guy in her myspace picture and i explained that 2 her then shes all like i don't care w/e. she then sed she repierced her belly button, then she started talking about pain then i said eeek i h8 pain trying to be friendly and she starts talking about how she likes pain n bllood n all that sorta depressing emo stuff. I believe its a act but im unsure what her goal is she is trying to acheive.

 

In the end ive done my best, i havn't done anything wrong in our relationship i just am really confused

 

Im expecting msgs tommorow but yer she wrote a msg b4 i left because my friend told me 2 say 2 her look tell her ur going 2 bed then shes like theirs something i wanna tell u then i ask what and shes like oh dont worry go 2 bed. I dont reply 4 like 5 minutes and she goes, ur phone is off im like what... no its just im in a ****ty cell area so i have 2 move 2 a different part of my room 2 get a constant reception and she sed me a msg saying so you didnt even say goodbye how rude. I sent a msg back saying if you wanna ring me go ahead im ready 2 chat and she wrote a msg on msn saying no im not going 2. Thats when i appeared offline and pretty much is where im at now. She also told me not 2 tell her friend because she wont speak 2 her if i do, but i no she listens 2 her friend so yer.

 

This is 1 crazy relo huh lol, but i feel as if somehow i can help her i will. Don't ask me why just i suppose when i care 4 ppl i wanna do my best 4 them.

 

So if this somewhat makes sense and im sorry 4 not editing it its just im really metally exhausted, could someone please give me their thoughts and advice.

 

Appreciate it

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