M2ZND Posted January 20, 2008 Posted January 20, 2008 My ex and I broke up with the hopes that one day we will be together again. We needed space to heal from an extremely tumultuous relationship. Fighting, loving....all of it emotionally intense for almost 2 years. It really took a toll on the both of us! My therapist says that our relationship was an addiction. I believe her. I fell off the wagon yesterday and tried to break NC. He did not respond. *thanks God* I am going shopping with a friend today. That will help me build my inner strength. But my friends can't be with me 24/7. Does anyone, please, have any tools/suggestions to use when I am home alone and extremely compelled to contact him? I have got to learn to STOP!
sedgwick Posted January 20, 2008 Posted January 20, 2008 What I do is distract myself in any way possible, preferably by leaving my apartment, phone, and computer. I force myself to do something else right that very minute: go for a walk, go to yoga, go to my favorite coffee shop and get coffee and sit for half an hour with a good book or my knitting. I tell myself that if I still want to contact him in half an hour, I can. Then when I get to the half hour mark I tell myself that if I can make it through another half hour, I will. Eventually the urge passes. I do not let myself act on impulse. If you distract yourself, you usually find that in half an hour you've found the strength not to call.
Author M2ZND Posted January 20, 2008 Author Posted January 20, 2008 Thanks Sedgewick! Sound advice indeed. I just posted something to someone that I need to take to heart myself. This site, just might be what I needed. Giving others advice when I need advice myself. Thanks!
Author M2ZND Posted February 1, 2008 Author Posted February 1, 2008 Sedwick... I am VERY interested in taking up yoga! Do you have any suggestions on beginning?
LoveLace Posted February 1, 2008 Posted February 1, 2008 Come here...and just talk about whatever you want, weather it's about your Ex or something else..it works for me if I'm trying to avoid calling someone. I usually think of something completely different to talk about but sometimes I like to spill my thoughts about a guy as well. I"ve also found that reading helps, weather it's a magazine or a novel. TV doesn't occupy me good enough. that, or just call a friend instead. I know you say that can't be there 24/7, but when they can be there it might help.
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