static79 Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 Guys, Quick question. I've got this friend, that I'm in love with. We had started making out a lot, and petting and stuff, but she would always stop and say that she doesn't feel that way about me. Well, after a party one night, she slept in my bed instead of driving. I don't know how it started, but making out led to sex. Multiple times throughout the night. She woke up the next morning and said, again, she doesn't have those feelings for me, even though she always tells me she loves me. I said that we loved each other and that's all that mattered. She said she didn't want to break my heart. She did, I finally told her that I was in love with her, and she still denied feelings for me. So, do I continue talking to her? She seems crazy, I know, from the outside, but she's actually a lot more stable emotionally than you would think. I just think she doesn't know what she wants. I know what I want, but that doesn't help. I do have strong feelings for her, but it's starting to drive me nuts. I just don't know whether I should just break contact with her completely, or try to be friends?
Green Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 you should go on dates and try to meet girls who do like you. If your like me you would also try to get FWB thing going with this girl so you can still get laid while your looking for a girl you can be in a real relationship with. It might be the tactic she is using with you. or she might just be crazy, even though you say shes not. You sound a little crazy too so... straighten your mind out and do what you know you need to. Being her lame go to guy isnt going to win her over and youve already tried everything u could
EYECANDY000 Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 If you still want her in your life then you have to respect the fact that she just wants to be friends. You could express your undying love for her, and if she doesnt like you in that way then she dont. Im sure you dont want to be with someone who is forcing their feelings towards you. Just lay off her as a relationship and focus on the friendship
T - mac Posted January 17, 2008 Posted January 17, 2008 i am only 16 but really, please just break off contact with her while you can, if she really doesnt have feelings for you the way you do for her, then you will save yourself alot of pain in the future. do it while you still can.
Author static79 Posted January 17, 2008 Author Posted January 17, 2008 you should go on dates and try to meet girls who do like you. If your like me you would also try to get FWB thing going with this girl so you can still get laid while your looking for a girl you can be in a real relationship with. It might be the tactic she is using with you. or she might just be crazy, even though you say shes not. You sound a little crazy too so... straighten your mind out and do what you know you need to. Being her lame go to guy isnt going to win her over and youve already tried everything u could Thanks man, You're right, I am a little crazy right now. I don't deal with confusing relationships like this very well. I'm pretty much an A or B person, and A.5 or 0.B don't really work for me. I'm done with this chick.
Sal Paradise Posted January 18, 2008 Posted January 18, 2008 Sounds like she is playing games with you. Why in the world would she tell you she feels nothing for you and then make out and eventually have sex with you. She is screwed up in the head or is trying to string you along until she makes up her mind. Find another chick, life is too short to waste your time on losers like this.
charlie55 Posted January 19, 2008 Posted January 19, 2008 I must say t-mac, your very mature for your age and i completley agree with you. If you carry on like this you will get very hurt, imagine how you will feel if she finds a boyfriend and you see them together, if you stay friends she will want you to accept him but you will find it too hard and begin to dislike him through jealousy....... It will bw far too hard, move on and find someone that loves you back..
burning 4 revenge Posted January 19, 2008 Posted January 19, 2008 you should go on dates and try to meet girls who do like you. If your like me you would also try to get FWB thing going with this girl so you can still get laid while your looking for a girl you can be in a real relationship with. It might be the tactic she is using with you. or she might just be crazy, even though you say shes not. You sound a little crazy too so... straighten your mind out and do what you know you need to. Being her lame go to guy isnt going to win her over and youve already tried everything u couldLOL KMT you're a man with great perspective. Id almost say that there's a philosphical quality about you. I think you may be a millionaire one day
Lucasarts Posted January 20, 2008 Posted January 20, 2008 KMT is just a guy who knows whats up (for the most part) listen to him. The more I read his replies to peoples questions (most of which are becoming quite repetitive and annoying at times) the more insight i get from it as well. Even though most of what is being said is COMMON SENSE, I guess its still helpful to have everyone say the same damn things to the OP just to make sure. As for my input: The girl is USING YOU (which i honestly dont mind, i've never really minded being used for sex...its fun, invigorating, and there's no commitment) and if you're starting to develop feelings for her, then its time to bail. When sex leads to romantic interests despite there being none felt by the other party, then you have to start questioning your own needs and wants and desires. What is it about this girl that gets you to liking her so much? From what you're writing, it just seems to be physical. There's nothing wrong with loving someone for their physical being and sexual appetite, but its usually not a good way to base a relationship (or even calling it "love"). Honestly, I don't think you love her, I think you love the idea of loving her. But I'd keep the girl on the side while you pursue a girl who will actually return the feelings of "love" back to you after you confess them to her (a FWB is never a bad thing, as long as it doesn't turn into something more. . .).
mental_traveller Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 You should forget any prospect of a serious relationship with her. So if you want a serious relationship, you're gonna have to get out there and date other women. However, as your friend has proven herself willing to have sex with you multiple times when drunk, I suggest that whenever you hit a dry patch on the dating front, you give her a call, bring lots of booze, and get yourself some FWB nookie
Ariadne Posted January 25, 2008 Posted January 25, 2008 Hi, I just don't know whether I should just break contact with her completely, or try to be friends? None. Just continue having sex with her.
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