screwedup55 Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 She broke up with me a few weeks ago. She said she was going to take a break from relationships because she had always moved from one relationship to another with few breaks in between. I find out that a little while after she broke up with me her ex, who broke her heart, came back and wanted to get back together. I cant believe she agreed and it took about a week of them seeing each other to pick up where they left off. I'm so angry and hurt! I know she didn't lie to me, but it sure feels like it. Some break from relationships. I guess she never got over her ex. Problem is I still love her and I still talk to her and we have some mutual friends. I want to move on and I don't want to move on. I've thought about trying to find someone else, but whenever I look at another woman I compare the woman with her. I feel like screaming. Ahhhhhhhh! In need of some sympathy.
k10k Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 Just want you to know that I can relate to how you are feeling and I'm sorry that you are in this situation - you have my sympathy . It hurts to know that someone can just jump into another relationship so soon after leaving you.. the same thing happened to me. "Problem is I still love her and I still talk to her and we have some mutual friends. I want to move on and I don't want to move on". You have to choose to move on - holding onto the things/people that cause us pain and anger only end up hurting us further. Moving on means letting go. She has left you and has decided to be with someone else. Why would you want to talk to the person who has caused you so much pain? The emotions will take some time to sort themselves out - I've also been battling with feelings of anger - but feel what you're feeling and then let it go. Scream if you have to - I'm sure it will help release some of that anger. I've thought about trying to find someone else, but whenever I look at another woman I compare the woman with her. It's only been a few weeks, you need to give yourself some more time. Like everyone on here says - take this time to re-discover who you are. It's time to focus on you now - jumping into another relationship is not the answer.
Author screwedup55 Posted January 16, 2008 Author Posted January 16, 2008 (edited) Thanks k. Your advice is greatly appreciated even if what I say may not seem like it. What's also digging at me is that he regained her trust almost immediately even though he broke her heart badly and in a bad way. I was there to help pick up the pieces, so it makes me extra angry that he can just come back and apologize and explain why he did what he did and wham he is back in. It seems like there was no time to rebuild her trust for him. I still talk to her because I made a promise to her before we started that we would still be friends if things didn't work out. I still enjoy her personality and company. So the NC would be hard to do. The LC is happening a bit because as things get better with her ex. She talks to me less. I never lost who I am and am pretty content with who I am. She never asked me to change for her. So taking time to rediscover myself isn't really much of an option. Plus the distraction advice that other people give, not working too well, the things that I would distract myself with only remind me of her because we had the same main interests in our lives. I know jumping into a relationship is not the answer as I am experiencing something similar right now. I'm not looking to jumped into a relationship, but thought about taking it really slow and ease into something if I find someone. I need someway to get rid of this anger and sadness. It's affecting my ability to function. Edited January 16, 2008 by screwedup55
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