maria22 Posted January 15, 2008 Posted January 15, 2008 Hello I'm going to get straight to the point, my boyfriend seems nervous when we make love which makes me extra nervous. It is a fairly new relationship, but sometimes I feel that he should be more .. sensual instead of joking around and even talking.. it feels like he doesnt take it seriously, perhaps he is nervous but it makes me feel very self conscious. I've never been interested in this side of our relationship too much, i'd rather be held and cherished, but since he initiates it every time and then loses his *cough* or just simply doesnt do his thing.. I just wonder if this will get worse. Because in my experience most males hold sexual activity in high priority............. However I always try to make him feel like I DO want to make love with him... well of course I do.. it's just not my main priority I tried asking if I did something wrong, he says no.. and I don't want to keep asking.. cause, I love him I want to know if this is normal to be concerned about, or if i'm having trouble adjusting to this new relationship (the last relationship was very bad) perhaps it's just me... but I want to be sure.. And if he's just nervous, what can I do about it? I want to feel cared for and cherished.. I don't really think it's something we should be joking about when it comes down to it...... Advice? Maria
JustinWolf Posted January 15, 2008 Posted January 15, 2008 Maybe you should take things a bit slower, if he can't lift it, it's maybe because he's really nervous, first get him to be relaxed and then go from there. Take your time
Lucasarts Posted January 15, 2008 Posted January 15, 2008 maybe he has ED? i wouldnt understand why he would b so nervous during the time to perform... there are reasons, but they shouldn't apply to your situation. anywho, just try your best to calm him down and maybe take the initiative after he does...you know, try to help him out with his problem when the stage is set... lol i feel weird trying to tell a girl how to help a man with his personal problem without going in depth and descriptive about it. But yeah, use your body and your sexual prowess to help him out because it seems like he cant do himself right now.
Lee725 Posted January 15, 2008 Posted January 15, 2008 A new relationship can cause some pretty bad nerves. Reassure him that you find him attractive and that he is doing the right things when he does them. If he looses his *cough*, assure him that is OK too. With time he will get more confident. Have not really dated a "bedroom nervous" man although i dated one once who use to shake when he cuddled me, but in the bedroom was a "tiger".
rosalie Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 I had this with a boyfriend once Maria, who got a little too excited a little too quickly, don't take it personally it's not about you. He went to his doctor who gave him some advice.... Maybe you should discuss it with him in a non confrontational way, be light-hearted about it but don't do it whilst it's happening as that could make it worse. Keep it focused on him and not you. If it means anything that b-f and I ended up having a grat time I liked to think of his nervousness as a compliment you should too
Author maria22 Posted January 16, 2008 Author Posted January 16, 2008 ahh how nice of you to reply I didn't think I'd get any. Well, he has stopped being nervous or whatever it was he was feeling.. He even told me out of the blue that i'm the loveliest girlfriend who makes him feel nicer than any other girlfriend he has ever had in and out of bed .. ! ahhh love... thankyou !
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