Author Jmina Posted January 16, 2008 Author Posted January 16, 2008 Nerina Pallot Patience Lyrics Been good, been bad, got worse, got better. I feel I know myself when i'm looking in the mirror. Been hurt, been loved - I'm scarred, not bitter. I am an angel with the knowledge of a sinner. But what do I do, and how should I be? When I look at myself, I can only see me.... I need a little patience... Been hard, been soft, been both, been neither Above it all, I am only a survivor. Been down,been low, got up, got higher - We are only human, all just liars... So I wait for the day when I open my eyes And I look to myself, but it's no big surprise I need a little patience... Well i'm sitting here and sinking and i'm on the '8th floor And i'm thinking do I jump or should I stay around for more? I watch my friends get bigger and get better and get richer But i'm not bitter Time is ticking ticking ticking ticking ticking on with a vengeance I want it all I want it all I need a little patience....
jdeedee Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 Sorry I haven't been here to reply, work is actually productive today! Anyway, I send an email to my ex a month after we broke up. This was about three weeks ago now (wow, so short it feels like ages). I said I'm sorry, I missed her and apologised deeply for my errors. She still hasn't replied but I guess its okay. I don't know, I still don't know. I feel selfish a lot for my behavior towards her, even those behaviors I have now after the breakup. My thoughts are constantly self absorbed, I miss her, I want her, I miss us, etc. The hardest thing for me is to let go and accept the path I am on, instead of trying to yearn for some different set of circumstances. No clue if anything I just said helped, it turned into a self absorbed ramble
Author Jmina Posted January 16, 2008 Author Posted January 16, 2008 thanks for the company jdeedee glad to hear your keeping busy with work! i really should get some sleep now. its 3:30 am lets see what tmrw brings. i am expecting a much better day.
serendip Posted January 16, 2008 Posted January 16, 2008 cheer up Jmina...just ride out the emotion have some faith in yourself...you are a good person
carrotgirl Posted January 17, 2008 Posted January 17, 2008 Love to you Jmina. Fear of the Inexplicable But fear of the inexplicable has not alone impoverished the existence of the individual; the relationship between one human being and another has also been cramped by it, as though it had been lifted out of the riverbed of endless possibilities and set down in a fallow spot on the bank, to which nothing happens. For it is not inertia alone that is responsible for human relationships repeating themselves from case to case, indescribably monotonous and unrenewed: it is shyness before any sort of new, unforeseeable experience with which one does not think oneself able to cope. But only someone who is ready for everything, who excludes nothing, not even the most enigmatical, will live the relation to another as something alive and will himself draw exhaustively from his own existence. For if we think of this existence ofthe individual as a larger or smaller room, it appears evident that most people learn to know only a corner of their room, a place by the window, a strip of floor on which they walk up and down. Thus they have a certain security. And yet that dangerous insecurity is so much more human which drives the prisoners in Poe's stories to feel out the shapes of their horrible dungeonsand not be strangers to the unspeakable terror of their abode. We, however, are not prisoners. No traps or snares are set about us, and there is nothing which should intimidate or worry us. We are set down in life as in the element to which we best correspond, and over and above this we have through thousands of years of accommodation become so like this life, that when we hold still we are, through a happy mimicry, scarcely to be distinguished from all that surrounds us. We have no reason to mistrust our world, for it is not against us. Has it terrors, they are our terrors; has it abysses, those abysses belong to us; are dangers at hand, we must try to love them. And if only we arrange our life according to that principle which counsels us that we must always hold to the difficult, then that which now still seems to us the most alien will become what we most trust and find most faithful. How should we be able to forget those ancient myths about dragons that at the last moment turn into princesses; perhaps all the dragons of our lives are princesses who are only waiting to see us once beautiful and brave. Perhaps everything terrible is in its deepest being something helpless that wants help from us. Rainer Maria Rilke
Author Jmina Posted January 17, 2008 Author Posted January 17, 2008 I got a reply....i couldnt read it first, my best friend who was with me at the time read it first. i was so shocked and suprised that she replied...i cried for a few hours. i just feel shaken up... i think i will be able to find much more peace with this. what do you guys think about it??????where do you think she is with it all? she sounds numb to it... thanks guys Jmina I don't feel angry anymore, I don't really feel anything anymore about you or anything that happened. It's just something that happened and I am moving on with my life. That said, this email is way too premature for me. Please keep your distance from myself and my friends. I wish you the best in your endeavours and hope that you truly are as peaceful and strong as you say you are. Good luck for 2008, Kate
PLAYBRAT Posted January 17, 2008 Posted January 17, 2008 Well..it sounds like she is glad you're doing well...but she is content with moving on with her life and hopes you do too. I would look at it as final closure....it does not sound like she is interested in further contact.
serendip Posted January 17, 2008 Posted January 17, 2008 what do you guys think about it??????where do you think she is with it all? I don't feel angry anymore, I don't really feel anything anymore about you or anything that happened. It's just something that happened and I am moving on with my life. That said, this email is way too premature for me. Please keep your distance from myself and my friends. I wish you the best in your endeavours and hope that you truly are as peaceful and strong as you say you are. Good luck for 2008, Kate She doesn't want you to contact her anymore. She wants to move on with her life...and is not at the same stage you say you are at. Basically it's closure...let her go and be peaceful with it
Author Jmina Posted January 18, 2008 Author Posted January 18, 2008 (edited) so should i just leave it there and not reply with anything? i was thinking i would like to just send: Thankyou i am. Best wishes to you and your family for 08 also. Love Jasmin. i wouldnt be upset with no reply as i am defenetly not writing it for a reply... that would be it. Edited January 18, 2008 by Jmina
serendip Posted January 18, 2008 Posted January 18, 2008 so should i just leave it there and not reply with anything? i was thinking i would like to just send: Thankyou i am. Best wishes to you and your family for 08 also. Love Jasmin. i wouldnt be upset with no reply as i am defenetly not writing it for a reply... that would be it. Don't reply...your previous email said it all all your reply would do is continue something that she doesn't want to continue
Author Jmina Posted January 18, 2008 Author Posted January 18, 2008 Yeah i think you right. i think its time to just go with the flo now. Flow. Jmina
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