taylor3205 Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 Its been nearly 3 month since we split after a 9 year LTR. I go from extreme depression to extreme rage and anger. I cant snap myself out of it. I have just been on the phone to him and I am now raging. I know I need to go strict NC and the sooner I do this the better, but there is still a bit to sort out, financially etc Its the 2nd time he has left, last time he moved in with someone else for 6 month, i shouldnt have taken him back. Im just raging or depressed and its doing my head in. Its enough to drive someone crazy. The day I no longer feel anything towards him, I will celebrate!! He makes me feel worthless, he is pretty good at doing that. Ive done nothing but support him and help him with his business since we got back together about two years ago. Now he has took off and left me with nothing, while he reaps the rewards!! I feel like I have nothing, Im struggling financially and Im stressed to bits. I went to the doctors last week and now on anti depressants. I know I just need to get over him and work on myself but its easier said than done, it was a one sided relationship and I should be glad its over, but im not!! Just needed to rant!!
shayna Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 Wish I could offer you advice- but I'm there right where you are- only 3 months further along than you. And wishing that he'll come back even though it was an unhealthy relationship. I hope we both get thru this. Sometimes I just feel I won't. Life holds no purpose it seems. Sure, you go on with various activities and work yada yada. But its just not as fulfilling. But there will be one day where we will come out of our hole and realize that those other parts to life really are amazing too. We just HAVE to believe that.
Nomad1 Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 Taylor and Shayna - of course it is painful and it is the expectation and hope of getting back together that perpetuates the cycle. Usually one is a giver and the other a taker. The taker does not respect the giver and the giver is under his/her spell. One way to break the cycle is to stop giving. I know it is hard, but just switch off. The more you give of yourself, your time etc., the more they will take and the more they will despise you. Channel your anger into running a mile away from him / her. Ignore him/her. They do not exist. Chase any thought that imposes itself on your mind away. This will precipitate the moving on process. When the fantasy with the other turns into reality, they may come back to you for a dose of self-esteem and confidence boost because they know that you foolishly loved and adulated them. When they do this kick them to the curb like a piece of dirt. Do well for yourself. Love yourself. Nomad1
Lee725 Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 it was a one sided relationship and I should be glad its over, but im not!! Just needed to rant!! Sometimes a good rant is all we need to do. Rant away, i know i makes me feel better.
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