luvstarved Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 When my H describes a woman as "high maintenance", I generally have the feeling that this is someone who a) he finds attractive and b) he suspects probably would not go out with him if he were single and asked. I have asked him about it and he sort of says, no, it's the very kind of vain and difficult woman he cannot stand, but he says it with a little too much emotion for me to not think there's some sour grapes in there. Is my interpretation common/right on the mark/in the ballpark/way off based on others' experience? Thanks for replies
Mr. Lucky Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 From a man's standpoint, it typically means that amount of required investment - time, finances and emotional energy -isn't supported by the return in affection, companionship and sex. It's not a compliment... Mr. Lucky
Lizzie60 Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 I agree with Lucky.. I would see her as a 'difficult woman' hard to satisfy.. need lots of attention, etc. Certainly not a compliment.
JackJack Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 From a man's standpoint, it typically means that amount of required investment - time, finances and emotional energy -isn't supported by the return in affection, companionship and sex. It's not a compliment... Mr. Lucky I agree.
LankyGuy Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 I have always thought of women as high maintenance when they're the type that won't let their hair get messed up, won't leave the house without makeup and a nice outfit, and are always looking in the mirror sprucing up, etc. They usually have the Pamela Anderson look. Yes, they often usually need to be pined over and constantly supported emotionally, financially, etc as the others said. Now, I've changed my definition a bit...a woman can be a low maintenance "girl next door type" who doesn't get her nails and highlights done every week and likes to use coupons, but still be high maintenance in the emotional needs department. I know this all too well :-/ Not every guy thinks high maintenance (in the physical sense) is a bad thing. My brother loves high maintenance women...especially the snobby stand-offish type. We've always disagreed over women...I'm more of a Jennifer Love Hewitt guy and he's more of the Pamela Anderson guy... So it really depends...
Woggle Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 It usually means a woman that is unpleasable. No matter how well you treat her and no matter what you do she is never happy and will always be looking for the better deal. It can also mean a woman who is obsessed with her appearance though a woman like that is not always unpleasable.
Lovelybird Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 high maintainance means Eternal agony, not a compliment
OpenBook Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 When my H describes a woman as "high maintenance", I generally have the feeling that this is someone who a) he finds attractive and b) he suspects probably would not go out with him if he were single and asked. I have asked him about it and he sort of says, no, it's the very kind of vain and difficult woman he cannot stand, but he says it with a little too much emotion for me to not think there's some sour grapes in there. Is my interpretation common/right on the mark/in the ballpark/way off based on others' experience? Thanks for replies Based on my experience? You're right on the money, luvstarved. Many men, when rejected unpleasantly (e.g., the woman responds to his overtures by dismissing or insulting him), tend to sulk and point out negative things about the woman... even if they have to make it up. It's all about the ego. BTW, women do this too, but in a different way - they either analyze him to death, or analyze themselves to death.
Curmudgeon Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 Based on my experience? You're right on the money, luvstarved. Many men, when rejected unpleasantly (e.g., the woman responds to his overtures by dismissing or insulting him), tend to sulk and point out negative things about the woman... even if they have to make it up. It's all about the ego. BTW, women do this too, but in a different way - they either analyze him to death, or analyze themselves to death. I jokingly refer to my wife as "high maintenance" at times because she may wish to spend somewhat more on something than I might plan to but ultimately, we get what we pay for and if she's "indulged" herself it lasts. She also doesn't penny-pinch when it comes to food and while Imay grouse at the grocery bill on rare occasion, I certainly reap the benefits in terms of quality, variety and taste. If I were to describe any other woman as "high maintenance" it would not be joking or complimentary in any way. It would be perjorative. To me it would be tantamount to calling her "needy," overly indulgent or expensive beyond reason. A few examples: 1) a woman who needed to be the center of my attention all the time; 2) a woman who wouldn't be satisfied with the new Honda Accord EX I just purchased and would insist upon a Mercedes or BMW; 3) a woman who would only wear clothes with designer labels; 4) a woman who would insist upon eating out at upscale restaurants most evenings of the week.
fral945 Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 Mr. Lucky hit the mark. The other assessments are pretty good as well. I'd say (for me) the qualities I see in most high maintenance woman are: 1) They have high expectations & demand a lot from a man. They are never satisfied with what they have, how they are treated, etc. and always want the best of everything (cars, jewelry, clothes, houses, etc). 2) They take much more than they give. 3) Very attractive That's why when men see a very attractive women, the 1st thought that pops into their head (other than "What does she look like naked?") is "I bet she's high maintenance".
Virgo1982 Posted January 14, 2008 Posted January 14, 2008 I think it's pretty simple. Men created these monsters-not all men, but many. It's a basic as supply and demand to me. Yes, that game system may be worth $250, but everyone is trying to get one. So, they're selling on Craigslist for $350. I couldn't care either way. I think men who appreciate high-maintenance women should go for it. Either they'll learn a lesson or live happily ever after.
pickylady Posted January 14, 2008 Posted January 14, 2008 When my H describes a woman as "high maintenance", I generally have the feeling that this is someone who a) he finds attractive and b) he suspects probably would not go out with him if he were single and asked. I have asked him about it and he sort of says, no, it's the very kind of vain and difficult woman he cannot stand, but he says it with a little too much emotion for me to not think there's some sour grapes in there. Is my interpretation common/right on the mark/in the ballpark/way off based on others' experience? Thanks for replies It's an attractive person he believes would refuse to have sex with him, more or less. Yeah, it sounds like he has deep-seeded resentment for the possible rejection he has experienced in the past.
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