lexi29 Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 I'm not sure where to post this. Had a conversation wtih my bf last night. He is moving as his lease is up. He currently lives in a one bedroom apartment (his son sleeps on bed in living room) and he is moving to a 2 bedroom apartment. I've gone with him to look at these apartments and last night we went to look at a 3 bedroom house. He started talking about how he wants me to move in with him. I am not ready for that! And I dont plan on it any time soon which we discussed last night. But he brought up how we could split the rent 50/50 if we moved in together. He has an 8 yr old son (so basically his stuff would take up two rooms) and I have a lot of stuff (which would probably go in storage?) so it is fair to split it 50/50 or should his share be a little more since he has his son living there too? I'm just curious what people who have SO's with children who live together- how do you split the rent?
Lizzie60 Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 I'm not sure where to post this. Had a conversation wtih my bf last night. He is moving as his lease is up. He currently lives in a one bedroom apartment (his son sleeps on bed in living room) and he is moving to a 2 bedroom apartment. I've gone with him to look at these apartments and last night we went to look at a 3 bedroom house. He started talking about how he wants me to move in with him. I am not ready for that! And I dont plan on it any time soon which we discussed last night. But he brought up how we could split the rent 50/50 if we moved in together. He has an 8 yr old son (so basically his stuff would take up two rooms) and I have a lot of stuff (which would probably go in storage?) so it is fair to split it 50/50 or should his share be a little more since he has his son living there too? I'm just curious what people who have SO's with children who live together- how do you split the rent? In this case, no it's not... He should assume the cost for his child... not your responsibility. But since you don't want to move in with him... case dismissed!
Nevermind Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 I am not ready for that! And I dont plan on it any time soon Don't move in. But since this wasn't the question... He should pay for his sons space as well. Here is a suggestion: since most room in apartments are not the same size you should not make a 50/50 anyway. Instead pay the percentage you are using plus half of the common space (or a third in this case).
MystifiedByMen Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 This is kind of the same as my situation in San Diego when I was in college living with my bf. My Boyfriend, me, and a roommate. The couple pays 60% and the other roommate pays 40%. 60/40 seems to end up fair. So in the case of you bf and his son, they'd pay 60% of rent and utilities. You'd pay 40%. This situation worked well for us. This is a little more than 1/3 or 33.33333 but I assume this works out better in your case as his child may stay with his mom a day or two during the week? If not, you’d pay 40% not 33% because you have to assume that you will consume more recourses than a child. Food, water, electric, etc.. Hope this helps!
Art_Critic Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 I agree that it should be split into thirds.. with him paying 2/3 and you paying 1/3. This doesn't exactly fit your case since you are a GF and the kids are not yours but I will mention it just so you can believe the split is proper. If a judge was figuring out the cost of child care/child support and there was a home involved then the judge would split the either the rent or mortgage by the number of people living in the household as to figure out how much of the house expense should go toward the child.. or in this case 1/3 of the cost of the house expense would go toward the child.. so yes.. the child being in the home makes it splitable by 3 and not just by 2 adults.
Author lexi29 Posted January 11, 2008 Author Posted January 11, 2008 Thanks for the responses. No, I have no intentions of moving in with him anytime soon. But because he brought that up (50/50 split) I was curious what others do. Actually his child WOULD consume more water (he takes baths, I take showers), food (he eats constantly and wastes a lot of stuff) and definately would use more electricity (he is ALWAYS watching tv or playing his playstation and has all sorts of gadgets that require electricity. I"m not complaining just saying that there is an added cost to have him there. I love him dearly and have no problem with these things but just points to my line of thinking that my bf should pay more of the rent than me, if we should ever decide to take that step. (I am NOT even considering it at this point but who knows what the future may hold) I have lived with one guy before but it was his place and he paid the rent and I paid all the utilities (not exactly equal but he did make about three times as much money as I did so he didn't complain) and his son only spends every other weekend with his mother so yes he is around all the time. Thanks to everyone who took the time to respond. I appreciate it!
LovesDog Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 50/50 sounds like my ex who was socially retarded! he'd order up an expensive dinner and beer and i'd order up something inexpensive and soda. then he'd say, wanna split 50/50? what a dumbass. i said, uhhh no! that was early on in the relationship, when i should've ended it right away. but i'm stupid when it comes to giving people more chances. mostly he was good about paying for stuff, but i thought it was rude for him to ask me that. in your case, you shouldn't pay 50/50 either. you would pay rent on one room, whatever that fair amount would be. so, i guess 1/3 the rent. a really good man wouldn't ask you for rent at all; he'd just ask you to move in. funny enough, my ex (50/50 guy) did just this...paid for everything at the house. sounds like you made the right decision not to move in
Author lexi29 Posted January 11, 2008 Author Posted January 11, 2008 Me not moving in with him doesn't have anything to do with the way the rent is split up. It was just a subject that came up last night and I was suprised that he wanted to split it down the middle. To be fair, I do make a tiny bit more money than he does (almost $2 hr more) but not enough that it should matter. The only reason he brought up splitting the rent in this three bedroom house he looked at is that he couldnt' afford it on his own. So if he were to stay in his current apt. if he asked me to move in I'm sure he wouldnt' ask for rent. I had just asked the question here cause I felt like I might be being selfish by thinking HE should pay more money because his son would be living there too (so it would be 2 of them and just me). It really suprised me that most people think he should pay more because of his son. (but thats a good thing:)) However if the situation were reversed and it was a woman with a child moving in with her bf would you still say she should pay more in rent?
Nevermind Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 However if the situation were reversed and it was a woman with a child moving in with her bf would you still say she should pay more in rent? If all the other circumstances are the same, yes. Of course.
Art_Critic Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 a really good man wouldn't ask you for rent at all; he'd just ask you to move in. However if the situation were reversed and it was a woman with a child moving in with her bf would you still say she should pay more in rent? If all the other circumstances are the same, yes. Of course. I have to agree with LovesDog on this.. I have lived with many women over my life and each of them had moved in with me.. I have owned a own house(s) since my early 20's. I have never once ever had a GF that moved in with me split the bills.. I always paid for everything.. they would chip in with groceries and such though.. If the roles were reversed.. Ideally I agree with Nevermind in that things should be the same.. Realistically though.. No.. men have a tendency to take care of their women.. and most likely most guys would NOT ask or have her pay half. or at all.
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