Hamz Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 Hi! I'm new to the site, well I've been reading posts for a few weeks now, and have decided to post something myself. I'm not sure if this is the right board or not. I had been seeing my ex for about 2.5 years and then broke up with him last July. We had been fighting for a while (he thought I was needy and felt like he wasn't really giving me anything that I needed), he moved from DC to NY, we both had poor communication, and I just felt like it wasnt working out. I was also a little depressed and I think that had some effect on things (something that I've started to take control of just over the past month or so). We didnt communicate that much and I tried seeing other guys but I always missed him and was constantly thinking about him. We started talking again, just casually, in September and then I went to see him in October. Things were great, we had a great time, we ended up sleeping together which I knew would happen. That weekend we decided to try to casually date, and be open to seeing others. We continued to talk and then I two more times between October and December. I wanted to get back together with him and be "exclusive" basically, he did not and wanted to see others. He also was wary about getting back together because I hurt him when I broke up with him in July (obviously, I understand that!). I got VERY upset... crying every day, not eating, anxiety, I suppose the "usual." I've been seeing a counselor and my dr. put me on a low dose of anti-depressants (something I should have been on for a long time), and I've been feeling a lot better. Since then I decided I needed a break. I tried NC, but I pretty much suck at that. So, we have talked (mostly IM). The other night we had a long conversation about our relationship, what we both did wrong, etc. etc. He also blurted out that "in a perfect world, we never would have broken up" and that he cares... I know I need to give him space and should stop contacting him. I keep IMing him and I called him the other night. Hes not really reaching out to me. I'm going to NY this weekend with some friends. I was thinking about meeting up with him for lunch on Sunday (which also happens to be his birthday) but I'm not sure that's the best idea. Do you think I should or should not, why? I don't know what to do!!! I do miss him and love him. Gahhhhh!
hads1 Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 I think that you should go to lunch with him -- because it is his birthday you have a reason other than trying to get back with him. But recognize that he may still be wary. Keep trying, I guess
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