pajamaman Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Hi everyone. Glad to be with some insightful people. I need help on this one. - I am 43. she just turned 35 last weekend - we live 3 hrs apart. we met in my city early nov 07. - went to see her late nov 07. hit it off. great chemistry. had great sex on second night. she want nothing serious. i said ok. - went back to see her mid-december 07 and stayed 4 days with her. lots of sex and good times exploring her city. this is when she said she thinks she loves me. i said me too. she want my baby so we started having unprotected sex. she made travel plans for us, a road trip and an a trip to japan later in fall of 08. cool. - a day or so after i got back from my city, she called saying she wants us to buy a house in her city and she had one picked out already. i said we are not in a relationship yet you want a baby and a house with me. she said we can try the relationship part. ok. we explored the buying house part. - a week after, she called saying she is not sure about us and she said I AM MOVING TOO FAST AND PUSHING HER INTO A RELATIONSHIP WITH ME. i told her, ok. we do not need to prolong this back and forth crap and said my goodbyes. the next day, she called wanting to give it another shot. i said ok and one more wishy washy crap and i am forever out. i can not trust someone who is like that. she said ok. - i go back to see her first week of jan 08. spent 4 days. all was great. more sex than ever and more intense. her bday, i made her dinner and other dishes so she can have food for at least 2 or 3 days. went out to town and had a blast. when we got back to her house, she said we are not bf/gf anymore. i was upset but i said ok. packed my bags and ready to leave. i had a few drinks and not in any condition to drive 3 hrs in the middle of the night. so i stayed. we made up and had sex 4x in 5 hrs. so no sleep for us. i left. all is good. - she text when i got back home saying she decided to move in with me instead. within 2-3 months. i said great. 3 hrs after the text. she emailed me saying she is not ready for a relationship and i am pushing her into it. she also confessed how she expected to have a cake instead of my cooking for her bday. and how i am too jealous and possessive. - i responded that i am more disappointed that she did not appreciate my effort for her bday. and that is it for me. tired of this back and forth and the ungratefulness. - she keep texting me 2 or 3 times a day the past 2 days. mentioning the house, mentioning our intimate moments. i ignored all of them. - last night she text me thanking me for ignoring her. i emailed her saying YOU DESERVE IT COZ YOU ARE ACTING IRRATIONAL, ERRATIC, AND CHILDISH. IF YOU STOP THE GAMES AND ACT LIKE AN ADULT YOU WILL GET A BETTER TREATMENT. she blew off in her response saying it is forever over for us and not even friends. now.... WHAT IS WRONG WITH HER?
SeraBella Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 I think EVERYTHING is wrong with this entire relationship.
Jordane Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 She's psychotic. WTF?! Thirty-five and she's acting like this?! RUNNNN!!!
StartingOver07 Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Agree with all that's been written. And... if you decide to get back together with her, start using contraception or you may find yourself forever tied to this person via the child you conceive.
Author pajamaman Posted January 11, 2008 Author Posted January 11, 2008 i feel so relieved as if i dodge the bullet on this one.... whew!
Author pajamaman Posted January 13, 2008 Author Posted January 13, 2008 we exchanged a few emails. i pointed out to her that the baby, the house, and moving in together was her all her ideas. i also told her it was her that was rushing this relationship to another level. now she is accusing me of being jealous, controlling, and possessive. there is no basis for all this accusation. i have not responded to this email because it is ridiculous to me and 3 days had passed already. a lady friend suggested that i reply and point out that there is no reason for her to accuse me of being jealous, controlling, and possessive. if i don't it would amount to admission. to me this is so childish. that is why i am not inclined to respond at all.
Jordane Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 Who cares what she thinks? She's a total whackjob and you shouldn't want anything to do with her. Just let her crazy ass be.
SeraBella Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 I would say ignore her. If you respond it gives her more reason to keep writing back. She is insane, just ignore her and let it be.
compassion42 Posted January 13, 2008 Posted January 13, 2008 She's really not stable...some form of mental illness I bet. You can do better and deserve better-move on!
serial muse Posted January 14, 2008 Posted January 14, 2008 a lady friend suggested that i reply and point out that there is no reason for her to accuse me of being jealous, controlling, and possessive. if i don't it would amount to admission. to me this is so childish. that is why i am not inclined to respond at all. i don't think you should bother replying, either. what's the point? you've already said basically that you think she was erratic and that she's the one who brought up the baby, house, moving in together after barely dating for a month. i'd say you got your point across. seriously - you already know she's crazy; deep down, i'd bet she knows it too. i don't think it amounts to admission if you don't reply. it amounts to "i'm done with this conversation." nothing says 'i'm done' like silence. just leave this one alone. you're lucky to be out of it!
Author pajamaman Posted January 15, 2008 Author Posted January 15, 2008 thanks for your responses. i am doing exactly what most of you advise. sometimes i just wonder how a 35 year old woman could act like that. i used to date younger women before i met her. i thought for once i am going to be with someone more mature and more sure of what she wants in life. i was mistaken. she was more immature and unsure of what she wants than most of the women i dated younger than her.
Chrome Barracuda Posted January 15, 2008 Posted January 15, 2008 thanks for your responses. i am doing exactly what most of you advise. sometimes i just wonder how a 35 year old woman could act like that. i used to date younger women before i met her. i thought for once i am going to be with someone more mature and more sure of what she wants in life. i was mistaken. she was more immature and unsure of what she wants than most of the women i dated younger than her. Really doesnt matter what age they are some women are just plain F-ing crazy!!!
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