itgirl Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Not posted on here for a while. so here goes. This is my story. Been friends with MM for the past 8 years. Beginning of last year I got took to hospital from work, when i returned back to work, MM came to see if i was ok and started to email me. His emails became more intimate and he started saying things like I don't know what i'd do without you and so on. anyway we had a chat and things kind of happened from there. We both said that he would never leave his wife and kids for me and i didn't want that either. Throughout the year we saw each other 5 days a week, 7 hours a day (we both work in same place). We have had a physical affair for the past year now. i saw him when I wanted and vice versa. The christmas holidays came he gave me my xmas pressie and we had a staff xmas party to go to. We didn't go together for obvious reasons, so my boss picked me up anyway we arrived at party and MM was already there on his own. The night went on and we didn't speak to each other, kept out of each others way. I got a little tipsy and started to dance with some male collegues. my boss came over and said MM was watching me all night and didn't look to happy. I ended up going home on my own. We had 2 weeks off at work so din't contact each other or see each other. Anyway we are now back at work and I asked him to help me with some work and i got an email from him saying "Sorry I don't think it's a good idea anymore", i sent one back saying "WHY". He replied with "JUST ACCEPT IT". This got me totally confused so I sent one back saying "What am I accepting?. He never replied. The next day i sent another email to him saying we are finished and we have just thrown 8 years of friendship out of the window". Again he never replied. its been a week now and we haven't seen each other or spoke to each other face to face, i'm avoiding him, he's avoiding me. Basically we've ended the Physical affair and ended our 8 year friendship as easy as that!!!!! I'm just wondering why he was being like that towards me???? Sorry about the essay
whichwayisup Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 He obviously has changed his mind about the affair and maybe his wife found out so he had to end the affair and friendship with you. Respect that, as much as it hurts you, you knew going in he was married and more than likely not ever going to leave his wife for you. You need to let go, heal and move on and NOT contact him on a personal level, only work related issues IF you have to talk to him. Not sure if you two work side by side, or have to deal with eachother, but if you can go out of your way NOT to talk to him, do so.
LucreziaBorgia Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Either his W became suspicious and he is ending it to preserve his marriage, or he got an OOW or, perhaps he simply just ended it because he simply didn't want it anymore. Regardless of the reason, he shut the door firmly because he doesn't want to be drawn back in in any way. As for your eight year friendship, unfortunately, your affair replaced your friendship and when the affair ended, in his mind there was no friendship to go back to.
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