km Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 How do I talk my husband out of remodeling our home, now that I know he's really not that good at it? He's got it in his head that he's not going to take 'no' for an answer from me -- but I've already lived through one near-catastrophic remodeling project of his, and I'm not willing to let him do it himself, any more. I'm willing to pay for a pro - how do I keep him (he's more than a wee bit immature) from having a temper and going ahead on his own?? Anyone ever live with this, before?
Kasan Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 How do I talk my husband out of remodeling our home, now that I know he's really not that good at it? He's got it in his head that he's not going to take 'no' for an answer from me -- but I've already lived through one near-catastrophic remodeling project of his, and I'm not willing to let him do it himself, any more. I'm willing to pay for a pro - how do I keep him (he's more than a wee bit immature) from having a temper and going ahead on his own?? Anyone ever live with this, before? What is the project that you need done?
Author km Posted January 10, 2008 Author Posted January 10, 2008 The project should be fairly minor -- shoring up a basement wall that's just starting to show a crack. The companies that have come out to look can all do this with minor disturbance. He wants to dig up the entire front yard. Two years ago, we almost got divorced over the clusterf*** that occurred when he did other work involving digging up the front yard. It took forever, cost too much, and resulted in massive mud runoffs into our neighbor's yard. I'm NOT going through that again!
lost4ever Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Good luck! My husband is the same way (he is really bad at house work, but always wants to do it) Our home was hit by a tornado he had to do all the work himself...I tried to play the, but hunny, it's so stressful, ..blah. blah. blah...it didn't work, and of course the siding is not done (he had problems) the windows are so loud, tons of things wrong...i love that man, but he shouldn't quit his day job (btw, I tried that line too...didn't work)
Kasan Posted January 10, 2008 Posted January 10, 2008 Unless he's a contractor I wouldn't want him to touch the basement wall either, as this could really affect the value of your home. It's one of the first places that home inspectors look at when they inspect the home for resale.
MysticStar Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 There are some things you shouldn't mess with. I've gutted rooms, added rooms, replaced windows etc. But I know my limits. The garage I had built by the pros. The playhouse for the kids I did myself. But when it comes to digging, and foundation work, I hire someone. Too much work, and my time is worth more to me. I'd rather work the overtime and pay someone else to do the job. How are you going to get your hubby to cease and desist? I don't no, maybe threaten him with divorce???
HokeyReligions Posted January 11, 2008 Posted January 11, 2008 Do you have a home improvement store that has demonstrations or pro's that will work with you? Sometimes if a pro can show him exactly what needs to be done, in what order, give a reasonable estimate of time it will take for each phase, and how much the tools and supplies will cost it will overwhelm him into either hiring it out - or at least he may learn enough that it won't be such a total disaster. We watch a lot of those home improvement shows because we are thinking of doing some of our own work on our kitchen remodel. They make it look simple, but I have to remind him that they have teams of people who do this, behind the scenes, all night often, and even then it takes longer than the 30 or 60 minutes it takes to show the whole thing on TV. By searching the Internet (DIY) for step-by-step instructions on these projects and printing them out he see's (me too, I've been guilty of over-confidence too!) that its not as simple as it looks. Overwhelm him with information - plans, instructions, decisions about what materials to use, budget, and be as overly helpful as you can and maybe that will wear him down enough to give up and hire it done. You'll probably argue some, but you might be able to steer him to something he CAN do so he doesn't feel like he's not a part of some projects - but the stuff that you know you need pros for will be done by pros and his ego won't take such a big hit. Be supportive so he doesn't feel he has to prove you wrong. Good luck. I know how it is!
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