alexa137 Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 ok i iwill make this short -met a guy thanksgiving week, he was interested in me, sent me an email so we chatted etc. phone , email then meet up, went out, dinner, bar, drink etc. hes been here at my apt, watched movies, etc--during christmas week and last week got some kisses , compliments, etc...well now within the last week nothing! barely calls me and when i try to send him hints i get nothing back! i dont understand also he jsut moved out of apartment(guy roomate) into a house with a girl(he says just a business agreement, they are not involved or nothing) so what happened and how do i ask him a question wanting to know without sounding desperate or anything else? i am guessing hes just a friendly guy and is not really interested today we exchanged emails but was nothing to do with anything important just boring stuff like work, etc what do i think, or say im confused jsut want to know if i should move on and forget him or what! help!
EYECANDY000 Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 Know the reason why he doesnt come by anymore or calls before you move on. It sounds like you are still interested in this guy and just needs to know whats going on with him. While you guys are emailing eaching other about boring stuff like work, i would ask if him he wasnts to hang up somethime this week? it it seems like he is a little standoffish and not interested ... then you move on!
ElvenPriestess Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 It doesn't sound like you're ready to move on, I'd just ask him what's going on? Point out the 180 he did and ask if any thing is wrong? That's what I would do. House with a girl? I don't know about that one. What kind of business arrangement is that supposed to be, they're living together! And why not find a male to do that with?
EYECANDY000 Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 Know the reason why he doesnt come by anymore or calls before you move on. It sounds like you are still interested in this guy and just needs to know whats going on with him. While you guys are emailing eaching other about boring stuff like work, i would ask if him he wasnts to hang up somethime this week? it it seems like he is a little standoffish and not interested ... then you move on! Sorry forgot to do spell check!!!! Know the reason why he doesnt come by anymore or call before you move on. It sounds like you are still interested in this guy and needs to know whats going on with him. While you guys are emailing each other about boring stuff like work, I would ask him if he wants to hang out sometime? if it seems like he is a little standoffish and not interested ... Then thats when you move on!
shockandawed Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 I wouldn't ask him about why he has changed...that comes across as an attack and I know I wouldn't favorably respond to it. I also don't respond well to hints and such. Sounds like his interest is waning, or he could possibly be very busy the last few days. There is only one way to find out. Simply call him up and ask him for a specific date this weekend. Hey, would you like to go out Saturday night? You don't sound desperate, just interested. You will either get an acceptance or it will force him to have to address the issue. Either way, it should help you clarify his intentions. Good Luck.
Author alexa137 Posted January 9, 2008 Author Posted January 9, 2008 im not good at asking a guy out-i would rather wait and have him do it fear of rejection i guess it took me alot just to ask these question so heres my email and then his so you can fully see what was said etc ME oh ok so you go out to eat a lot then huh? wish i could sure you can come for dinner sometime- i was just wandering and i hate to ask but i thought you were kinda interested in me but since you moved, etc , you know, i thought maybe you were hooking up with the girl you moved in with or someone else idk! maybe i'm crazy! i should stop talking now and get to work! HIM The girl I moved in with is a roomate only. She is a nice lady but def not my type. LOL She is on my MS page. LIS.
ElvenPriestess Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 Well I would have stopped after the first half of your email, but you got a good result. He flat out told you where to locate her on his MS page. I really think you have nothing to worry about her now as he's been open like that. Still, he didn't mention anything between the two of you. You COULD respond with something like "Thanks for settling my mind, I knew I was being silly. So anyways, I was wondering how you feel about us at this point?" That's what I would do.
Author alexa137 Posted January 9, 2008 Author Posted January 9, 2008 yeah i know but so many guys lie! the last guy i dated kept telling me for months that the girl he was calling was "family" until 4 months later i found out they were having sex and shes pregnant! devastating! i dont think i could ask anymore questions because i dont really feel theres was or is an "us" i guess hes just very friendly, he does have 37 friends on his MS page and they are all women! so maybe hes jsut a player not whay i am looking for! i am 38 and dealt with players all my life! i am looking for someone who wants what i want-an honest relationship so i t hink i will leave him alone and not respond anymore and maybe hit delete from all sources! yeah i am a very negative person! but i have to be since i am still not over the ex dumping me a few months ago-i actually didnt cry for almost a week when i meet this guy-he kinda kept my mind off of the ex but now back to depression
ElvenPriestess Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 Aw, hun, try and cheer up. It will all work out no matter which way it goes. And you know what? It doesn't hurt to ask him, it's better to have the possibility of knowing than be totally in the dark right?
MakeLemonade Posted January 9, 2008 Posted January 9, 2008 (edited) At this point you really don't have much invested, I would move on to try to find someone who wants an honest, open relationship as you do. They are out there. Game players need to be left in the dust. They are a waste of time. Can't say he is definitely playing games I guess but he sure isn't pursuing you as you obviously would like to be and feel you deserve. I guess maybe he is just shy or taking it slow but all those MS friends and ALL are women. Maybe it's just me but that would be a red flag that he is a player or at least wants to be. He also didn't address what you said in your message about you thinking he was kinda interested in you (i.e. - only allayed your fears about the roommate to keep you interested). Unless there was more to the message that you posted.....if you choose to keep pursuing, don't put too much of your heart in his basket until you get on much more solid footing with him. Edited January 9, 2008 by MakeLemonade
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